Can you define roles and will people want to fill them?
Maybe you’ll discover the next Cherry Garcia.
What Brings You Here?
At the upscale end of the corporate spectrum, questions are effective tools in defining purpose and motivating mission. I learned how powerful they could be from Diana Oreck, who was working for Ritz-Carlton at the time we met. She explained how the company uses questions to imbue its employees with its “gold standard” ethic.
We ran into one another on one of those packed flights that prompts commiseration among strangers about survival instincts and contortionist skills. Our conversation in “economy class” turned out to be supremely ironic since Oreck is a first-class connoisseur. She hails from the famous family that made a fortune in vacuum cleaners. Growing up in Mexico, she often traveled with her parents as they tended the business. They frequented fine hotels and young Diana fell in love with the glamour and mystique of the fanciest, most exotic places they stayed—the ones with ornate lobbies and mysterious people from around the world. If they stayed long enough, she found that staff became family. The adventure was thrilling. She went into the hotel business, leaving vacuums to the relatives.
Ritz-Carlton owns more than eighty hotels in twenty-six countries. With revenue of more $3 billion a year, the hotels employ 38,000 people. Their goal is to dominate the luxury hospitality business and create genuine brand loyalty in their well-heeled customers. In this super-competitive world, Oreck told me, visitors expect service that goes above and beyond.
“If you have a satisfied customer, you’ve only met their needs. In this environment that’s not enough. You need to exceed expectations.” The customer can’t be just a transaction and a “head in a bed.” There has to be something more.
Oreck trained Ritz-Carlton managers and staff to understand and share the mission so they could fulfill it. Committed to “unique and memorable” experiences that will turn guests into “customers for life,” the company wants to create an experience that “enlivens the senses, instills well-being, and fulfills even the unexpressed wishes and needs of our guests.”
What defines us?
What do we stand for?
How do we deliver on the promise?
At staff meetings and other gatherings, employees are asked about their ideas and suggestions, their successes and failures. They’re encouraged to tell stories—the good, the bad, and the unbelievable. They act out hypothetical scenarios to see if they’re living up to the credo that’s been drilled into them. A young couple comes to the restaurant with a toddler. What is the first thing you say, the first thing you do? An older couple arrives at check-in and the woman appears stressed and angry. What do you say?
Oreck calls it “radar on, antenna up,” driven by good questions, careful listening, and thorough training. She explained that every employee who dealt with guests had authority to unilaterally spend, credit, or discount up to $2,000 per day to “make it right or delight.” If you’re going to build a workforce that buys into the culture, she explained, you have to empower and engage your employees.
“As an employee, if I have to run to the manager every time I want to help a guest, the company is telling me I’m too stupid to help, or I’m going to give too much away, or you as the company were joking when you said you trusted me.”
Ritz-Carlton’s training teaches employees to use their own questions to create relationships with the guests and deliver on the mission. A guest goes up to the concierge and asks where the gift shop is. Rather than simply directing the customer down the hall, the concierge will, when possible, accompany the guest partway and may ask, “What brings you to our lovely city?” If the guest says she’s in town for a wine tasting, the concierge can use the information to recommend a restaurant with an amazing wine cellar.
Questions don’t win the war if they’re not accompanied by active and effective listening. “We have a ratio: two ears and one mouth,” Oreck notes, telling me that the hotel staff must make “emotional connections.” She counsels everyone she trains to listen hard for emotional indicators—joy, anger, frustration. Her lesson plan is mission-focused: Create that experience that will lead to a “customer for life.”
Ritz-Carlton is no charity. It is big business. But like Ben & Jerry’s and the World Food Program USA, it cannot succeed with its gold-plated mission if the people who work there aren’t asked to be part of it and execute it.
Asking to Listen
Throughout this book I’ve connected the discipline of asking to the art of listening—deep and active listening. In the case of mission questions that seek shared purpose, you’re listening for comments and clues that reveal motivations, ambitions, and capacity that align with your mission. If you’re asking Jordan to support your cause, you’re listening for indications of his commitment and passion. You’re listening for comments that show optimism or outrage, inspiration or indignation, or some expression to suggest that Jordan agrees that yours is a worthy cause and he is interested in doing something to advance it.
If you’re talking to Clara about financing a business, you will be listening closely for anything she says about the viability of the idea, about the marketplace or the business plan, or about the competition or cash flow. You’re listening for hidden or unexpected places to explore and connect. If you hear a suggestion about the satisfaction that comes from giving, you have another topic to ask about:
What have you supported that has really made a difference?
“Oh, that’s easy,” Clara might say, “It was the work we did on the home for sick kids. We saw the wonderful place get built. It helped entire families get through their ordeal.”
How did you get involved in that?
“We met with this amazing woman who so impressed us with her commitment and her approach. We knew that she could pull it off.”
Here’s where the close listening comes in, and an echo question.
We?
“Yes,” comes the reply. “My husband and our daughter, Emma. We make these decisions as a team.”
You’ve just learned essential information about why the family gives, what made for a credible project, and, importantly, how they give as a family. You build the relationship accordingly.
Karen Osborne counsels that we can all be better listeners. First, consider what type of listener you are.
Do you listen for data, facts, and specifics?
Do you key into stories because you relate to people?
Do you respond to emotion?
What interests you and gets your attention?
What prompts you to respond?
How hard is it to remain silent?
Figuring out what kind of listener you are will help you listen better and craft more precise questions and areas for follow up.
Next, identify your weaknesses.
Are you an interrupter?
Are you someone who has to drive a conversation; who has to fill silences and pauses?
Does your mind wander?
Do you look down and do email?
Is it because you have trouble focusing or are just bored?
Can you identify the types of conversations or the points along the way when your mind might wander?
Do you suffer from the “I syndrome,” a habit of instantly turning what you just heard into a comment about or reference to yourself?
If you listen closely to yourself and to others, you will discover how many people fall into the “I syndrome” trap and how often it occurs.