After the funeral, we received a visit from the lawyer of Sir Charles, who informed Chloe and myself very politely that three thousand pounds each had been bequeathed to us. He added that the heir would be down next day, and he thought we should see the propriety of leaving the Hall before his arrival, and he hoped we should take the children with us, as no provision appeared to have been made for them.
To these propositions we consented, and left that same night. Three days afterwards we were in London.
We found comfortable lodgings in a street over against St. Martin's Church; at Charing Cross, and I at once gave Chloe her cue. I was to pass for widow, whose husband, a ship captain, had been drowned three years before. Chloe was my sister,the little girls my children. With this view, I told them they were always tp call me mamma,and Chloe aunt. Poor innocents! they had no recollection of a mother, having both been kidnapped by gipsies, from whom I bought them for Sir Charles, nor have I the least idea of the condition of life from which they had been removed.
Having thus cleared the ground, we were prepared with a ready tale, when the next morning our officious landlady with the curiosity of her class, began, while setting the breakfast things,to put the usual pumping questions.
That good woman having forced out, as she thought, all she wanted to know, and seeing our purses were well filled, left us at length with a profusion of courtesies.
In the course of the morning, sending for a coach,and taking the children with us, we set off for the Temple.
In Pump Court lived a young member of the bar,a Mr. Randall, whom we were well acquainted with,from his having been a frequent visitor at the Hall in the shooting season.
This young spark was our very good friend — perhaps something more, and to him we proposed to apply as to the best means of investing our legacies.
We found our young Templar up three pair of stairs, in a very cheerful chamber. He received us in his robe-de-chambre, and with many apologies for the disorder of his rooms, set chairs and desired us to be seated.
As your ladyship has possibly never been in the Temple, a description of this young gentleman's chambers may amuse you.
The apartment in which we found ourselves was spacious, and well panelled with good oak wainscot, lighted by two casement windows which looked into the stone-paved court, in the centre of which stands a big pump, from which I suppose it derives its name. A large maple table, six massive chairs covered in sadly faded and worn velvet, a cabinet, and a rickety sideboard, comprised the furniture.
Over the chinney piece was what had once been a superb Venetian mirror, in a gilt frame, with sconces for lights; but now, all cracked and clouded, the gilding tarnished, it presented a sad picture of departed glory.
On the walls hung fencing foils and masks, boxing,gloves, prints representing favorite racehorses, pugilists, and so on. Mixed up with the remains of breakfast, lay the remnants of last night's debauch;a smashed punch bowl, wine glasses, pieces of pipes,lemons, etc..
On the sideboard were numerous bottles, full and empty, and the whole room was reeking with the odour of stale tobacco smoke, wine, and strong waters.
To complete the scene, so strange to our eyes,in a corner lay our young gallant's sword, thrust,through the belt, instead of into the scabbard, his wig, a watchman's lantern, a staff, a woman's cap, and a garter — the latter most probably the spoils of some affray in which the madcap had been engaged the night before, when he had beaten the watch.
A door on one side of the chamber I presumed to open into the bed room; but as there was no saying whether it might not contain some fair creature,your ladyship may be sure I was not so indiscreet as to put any impertinent question.
Mr Randall, having first picked up his wig,which he tossed carelessly on his head, turned to me and inquired, — ' What happy circumstance am I indebted to for the honour of a visit '?
I briefly told him I had called to request his advice as to the best way of investing our money.
'And so, ' said Mr Randall, crossing his legs,and producing a handsome snuff box, which he opened with one hand after the last mode and presented to me, and then took a large pinch, ' so that dear old sinner is defunct? '
I nodded.
'Strange, ' he continued, ' that I should not have heard of his death; but, gad, Herefordshire is a deuce of a way off. He was a capital fellow, was Sir Charles, but a very devil for the girls. Well,well, we must all die some day, I suppose, damme!And now, my dear creatures, what can I do for you? I cannot marry you both, but will take whichever of you will have me.'
He stopped a second, and receiving no reply, continued. — " But, damme, all this time you are wanting to learn how to invest your money? Three thousand pounds each! By Jove, that was devilish handsome of the old boy, though, wasnt it? Well, let me see, there's (counting on his fingers)- 1,Long Annuities; 2, Consols; 3, Indian Bonds; 4, South Sea(thats a bubble, mind my words, a bubble, not bubby, my dear, ' the wag added aside and turning to Chloe, " I did not say bubby, but a bubble — a bubble, my dear creatures, that will burst);5, There's Government Securities — Stop, I have it,' he continued; ' there is a capital house to be sold in Leicester Fields; it is freehold, well built, and handsomely fitted up; a night house, where all the bloods about town go, to get rid of their money. Old Mother H. — has made a fortune there;in five years, and is now retiring from business.She will want, let me see, I should say a thousand for the goodwill, and five hundred more for the furniture — a capital spec! The price of the freehold is two thousand, so that you may have the whole thing out and out for a cool seventeen hundred and fifty pounds each, if you two go halves. That is little more than half your money and with the rest you can buy an Annuity, my darlings.'
As, notwithstanding all his madcap ways, we knew Mr Randall to be a shrewd, clever man of the world, and of undoubted probity, I felt strong inclined to agreed but Chloe, more cautious, proposed that we should think it all over, and so;we left.
To cut the matter short, I may as well tell your ladyship that a few days afterwards we again saw our friend, and told him we had decided to follow his advice; and now I am mistress of the most patrician house of pleasure in the metropolis frequented as it is by nearly all the quality.
But really this letter has been much too long,
so with my humble duty to your ladyship,
I remain, madam, Your servant to command,
Phoebe Kissagen.
Letter II
Now strip my children, now at once leap in,
And see who best can dash through thick and thin.
TO LADY MARY MONTAGUE.
Madam,
I am vastly obliged to your good ladyship for all your kind inquiries. I am happy to say that, thank the Lord, my new place of businesses thriving nicely and while I can maintain my company select, and my girls in good health, all will go on well.
As my customers are all gentlemen of the first quality, I can fit your ladyship to a hair with a gallant, whenever you like to honour Leicester Field with a visit;,mine is the corner house at the south end; but be pleased, madam, to give me a day's notice, to give time for a few necessary inquiries.
You desire me, my lady, to give you a relation of our doings here, in the rogering line, and I'll use my endeavours to please your ladyship, which I can the more readily do, as both Chloe and myself have peepholes to all the rooms of our wenches, and can both see and hear all that passes in those chambers whenever we have a mind to.