"Bahrain."
"Bahrain?!"
He laughed at that. "We docked and have leave. There's a whole bunch of payphones here. My cell phone doesn't work here. This place is seriously depraved!"
"What time is it?", I asked him. What time zone was Bahrain in? That was on the other side of the world! "And what is this about depraved?"
"It's 2040 here. We're plus eight compared to the East Coast. And you don't need to know about depravity. You're married! To my mother, no less!", he answered with a laugh.
"Just remember, sonny, an old beat up paratrooper can kick a young Marine's ass any day of the week!" Smart ass kid!
After that we talked about the tornado in Springboro, and then I got Marilyn and the girls on the line with him.
I felt good enough to be able to cook that night, so we invited Tusker and Tessa over for dinner. The girls introduced them to Stormy and then told them about our adventures in the Midwest. Then Tusker suggested that as soon as we were done with the convention, we should head up to Sturgis, South Dakota, and campaign at the annual bike rally. I almost snorted my drink out through my nose, and then almost died of laughter when Tusker and Tessa had to explain to Marilyn some of the antics that routinely occurred at Sturgis. Then I had to ask Tessa if there were going to be any pictures surfacing of her in a wet t-shirt contest, or lounging naked on the back of Tusker's hog. Tusker didn't help any by denying her denials. The twins wanted to know how I knew about Sturgis; they had heard about it through their biker brother. That was going to make for an interesting conversation the next time I talked to Charlie!
We also gave the girls their birthday presents, which were some scarves and accessories their mother had picked up in Hollywood, at some fancy boutique. They oohed and aahhed appropriately, but I'll be damned if I could understand how such small amounts of fabric could command such ludicrous prices. Is it a woman thing? Or was I just being an old fart?
Monday I sent the twins and Stormy off to the vet for a checkup and shots and all the other things you need to do with puppies. They were also assigned to get the mutt a dog license! I'd hate to be hit with an unlicensed dog violation while running for Vice President!
Matt Scully showed up mid-morning on Monday, shortly after Marilyn left for the airport, and by late Tuesday we had a new speech written. I practiced giving it a couple of times, speaking at a makeshift lectern, and then Scully gave me a withering critique and we did a rewrite. I did another practice speech, and he wasn't as withering. We kept after it through Wednesday lunchtime, at which point he took a copy of the speech to run past Rove, Cheney, and Allbaugh. I didn't care by then. I was just exhausted by the whole process.
Thursday it was time for me to wave the flag in my various offices. I had the girls tend to my doctoring, and after my shower we were able to remove most of the bandages on my chest and arm. I still needed to keep the ribs taped up. Then I shooed them out and dressed in a good suit, and Frank helped me tie a tie one-handed, and I put the sling on and secured it properly to my chest. I wanted to heal up well enough that when it was time for my speech, I could do it without the sling.
Frank and I headed over to Westminster first, early enough to head into the Westminster Diner and greet people and have breakfast. Nick Papandreas was present, as I hoped he would be, and I invited him to join us. He greeted us warmly, and though he refused breakfast, he did have some coffee. He quizzed me all about the tornado, and then reminded everybody in the diner how I had saved the diner ten years ago. I shook a lot of hands before I could escape and then Frank and I drove over to the District Office and the campaign headquarters, located side by side in the strip mall up the road. I thanked everybody for all that they were doing, and got a lot of applause and congratulations.
By lunchtime we had flown to Washington, and I made a slow tour through the Rayburn Building, visiting friends and stopping at my offices for the Maryland Ninth. I made a nice little side deal with John Boehner that if I made it to Vice President, I would support him for the Whip position I was vacating. He was the head of the Republican Caucus currently, so this would be another step up the ladder. After that, we headed over to the Capitol, where I got to meet with my staff in the Whip's office as well as Hastert and DeLay. Again, more applause and congratulations. Then Marty joined us for a late supper before we headed back to Hereford.
Friday and Saturday I basically did some work in the Westminster office and did some campaigning throughout the Maryland Ninth. It looked as if I was going to beat Rob Hollister. The polls were definitely in my favor. I also had to field a few questions about what would happen if Bush won over Gore, and what would happen then. I explained the procedure, and then told them that while I couldn't tell them who would be running in the special election, it would be somebody they would approve of. The Republican Committee had agreed with Marty and me that Cheryl Dedrick would be the choice to replace me. She had sailed through their vetting process a lot easier than I had.
Marilyn came home from Hollywood Friday afternoon. She gave me a DVD with her introduction of me at the convention, and we played it on a television set in my office in Westminster. Marilyn might have been scared to death to speak in front of an audience, but one on one, she was just fine. I had to admit, it looked pretty slick! It ran about twenty minutes or so, going back to when I was a kid growing up in the suburbs, moving on to being a teenaged investor, on through high school and college. The narrator was none other than Magnum P.I. himself, Tom Selleck! As soon as he started talking and I knew who it was, I had to ask my wife if she met him!
"He's gorgeous!", she gushed. "If he wasn't already married, I wouldn't have come back!"
"That would really blow the family values vote, wouldn't it?", I remarked.
"He's got money, too.", she teased.
I just threw my hands up in despair at that point.
While Selleck was doing the narration, and various home photos were being run across the screen, Marilyn began talking about midway through the bio. They had her sitting in an armchair, partially in shadow, with shots of her from slightly off to the side. The format was one where she was getting asked questions from off camera, and they were taping and splicing in her replies. She started talking about from when we met in college, through my Army and Buckman Group years, and then about what I was doing as a Congressman. Eventually it came to an end. When this really played at the convention, the screen would go black, and then John Boehner would speak from offstage and announce my entry, and I would come out from behind the curtains.
It was very professional and slick. I told Marilyn, "Hell, this guy is great! Let me know when he starts walking on water, because I want to watch!"
"You're no help! I think I'm going back to Hollywood and look for Tom Selleck again!"
"I can always grow a new mustache."
"Yeah, but he still has hair!", she replied.
I made a menacing move towards her and she skedaddled out of my office. "It's a good thing for you I'm still an invalid!", I yelled after her.
Sunday afternoon we all flew up to Philly in the LongRanger. We even took Stormy with us. If they were going to play me up as the hero, I might as well do it big time. Even Democrats like puppy dogs! We flew into New Castle. Frank was waiting for us there with a limo and the security staff I was traveling with these days. Presidential nominees, like Bush and Gore, get Secret Service protection while they are campaigning. Vice Presidential nominees don't. If we won the election, that would all change, but right now I was providing my own protection detail.