To thoughts I might not even acknowledge.
Relief had eased the lines of Ash’s face as he asked, “How exactly would I take them from her?”
“Another simple process. One that could’ve occurred at any point during her Culling and before her Ascension.” Delfai was still staring at Ash in the same unsettling manner that he had looked upon me. “You must feed from her.”
“That’s it?” Frowning, I glanced at Ash. “But he has fed from me.”
The odd little smile faded from Delfai’s lips. “He must feed until the last drop of blood is taken. Until there is nothing but the embers left. Then, they will transfer to him. He will Ascend. But you…” He sighed. “You will not survive. You will die.”
Chapter 45
You will not survive.
I jerked as the god’s words echoed over and over.
“No. No,” Ash snarled as energy charged the air. Shadows blossomed beneath his flesh, churning rapidly. “You’re wrong.”
“You can successfully remove the embers. Any Primal could because she is, whether or not your father intended, a placeholder for them,” Delfai said quietly enough, but it sounded as if he shouted the words. “The realms are lucky no one else has learned of their existence in her,” he said, and I flinched. “But she cannot survive such an act.”
Death always finds you. Holland’s voice whispered through my thoughts. By the hands of a god or a misinformed mortal. By Kolis himself, and even by Death.
Ash.
I laughed.
As I stared at them, I laughed. I couldn’t help it. The sound was strange, too loud yet too brittle.
Ash’s head snapped to mine. His eyes were nearly pure orbs of eather. Shadows raced over his cheeks as faint tendrils spilled into the space around him. He was close to shifting, losing control, and I…
I was just there.
The floor didn’t feel as if it moved beneath me as it had the last time I’d heard someone speak about my demise so bluntly. There was no surprise. No shock. And maybe it was because I knew this. Didn’t I? I could allow myself to escape my fate for a time. But, deep down, I’d known that I wouldn’t be able to run from it.
“No,” Ash repeated as if the single word changed what Delfai had said. What an Arae had already told us. He shook his head, lines of tension bracketing his mouth as his eyes locked with mine. “There has to be something,” he rasped, turning back to Delfai. “It cannot be an either-or situation. There has to be a way to remove the embers without causing her harm. My father survived—”
“Your father was born a god destined to Ascend into his Primalhood, just as you. The embers belonged to him. They were hidden in her bloodline, in her mortal body. They didn’t belong to her,” he said in that same quiet, flat tone. “All it took was one drop of Primal blood for them to grow stronger in her and make it impossible for anyone to remove the embers.” He said what Holland had warned us about. “They have merged with her. Even if you had attempted to do this the moment you became aware of both embers being inside her, the end result would still be the same. It would be like cutting out her heart. There are only three options here. Either you become the true Primal of Life and restore balance to the realms. Someone else, another Primal, takes them—and I don’t think any of us wants that. Or she completes her Ascension, and you already ensured that—”
“Don’t.” My eyes flew open as the embers in my chest vibrated, pushing a flood of heat and energy through my veins. It hit the air. Glass cracked. “Do not finish that sentence.”
Delfai sat back. “I’m sorry, but you will die either way.” He sighed, and the sound was something…accepting. Resigned. “Whether the realms are saved in the process is up to—”
Ash shadowstepped, grasping the god by the throat and slamming him into the bookshelf several feet behind the settee and off the floor, rattling the furniture. Books pitched forward, falling like rain and thumping off the floor.
“Stop!” I cried, racing forward.
“Her death will not come at my hands,” Ash snarled in a guttural, barely recognizable voice. The hazy outline of wings made of eather appeared behind him. Essence sparked along his bare arms. “That is an unacceptable answer.”
My stomach lurched as I reached them, seeing that only eather filled his eyes now, and blood…blood began to drip from Delfai’s nose and the corner of his mouth. The god started to spasm, and the veins beneath his skin lit up.
Ash’s lips peeled back, revealing his fangs—
“Don’t!” I shouted. “This isn’t his fault.”
“Maybe not.” Ash’s voice dropped low, becoming nothing more than blood and shadows. “But perhaps he will become more creative in his answers once he spends some time in the Abyss.”
“That isn’t going to help. He told us what he knows. That answer isn’t going to change.” I grabbed Ash’s arm. The shock of the essence blew the wisps of hair back from my face. His skin felt like ice and stone. “Ash.”
His head snapped toward mine, and my heart stuttered. The shadows had stilled, leaving his flesh a striking mosaic of golden bronze and midnight. He was more Primal than man.
“This isn’t his fault, Ash.” I swallowed, smoothing my thumb over the hard skin of his forearm. “You’re hurting him, and he doesn’t deserve this. You don’t deserve another mark. Let him go. Please.”
A second passed. Just a heartbeat. But it felt like an eternity as he stared down at me, his body taut with power and violence, the striking lines of his features twisted in rage.
Then he released the god.
Well, dropped him.
Either way, Delfai was free.
He landed hard enough to shake a few more books free. They hit the floor around him as he leaned onto his side, hand at his throat, wheezing. Injured but alive.
I didn’t let go of Ash’s arm, and he didn’t look away from me as I forced him back from Delfai. Slowly, the shadows faded from his flesh, and the eather receded from his eyes.
“I should be dead,” Delfai rasped. “I’ve seen my death.”
Frowning, I glanced at the god but didn’t let go of Ash’s arm.
“You were supposed to kill me.” Delfai leaned back against the bookshelf, patches of skin along his arms and neck charred. My stomach churned. “That was how I died.”
“Well, you’re not dead, thanks to her.” Ash’s jaw worked as he glared at the god as if he were about to change his mind. “Congratulations.”
Delfai’s fingers stilled around his throat. “It may be cause for celebration.” His hand dropped to his lap. “Perhaps there is a silver beast and a brightest moon. Two. Not one,” he rambled. “Two then one.”
“What in the hell are you talking about?” Ash demanded.
“Nothing.” He smiled widely, revealing blood-streaked teeth. “Nothing but hope.”
There was a good chance that Ash had done some damage to Delfai’s mind because what he’d prattled on about made no sense. Silver beast? Brightest moon? It reminded me of the title Ash had given me, but I really didn’t know why he’d be rambling about that—and it honestly didn’t matter.