Without looking at her, Geraden added, “Just hope the lady Terisa is wrong. Just hope he gives us a little time. Today we got ready. Tomorrow I’ll fire up a furnace and start mixing sand.”
To her own surprise as much as anyone else’s, Terisa got up and left the room.
She didn’t want to hear it, that was alclass="underline" she just didn’t want to hear it. She was too recently come from Orison – from the Castellan’s distrust and Eremis’ cunning and Gilbur’s violence. She hadn’t had any sleep except for the short rest which had come over her unexpectedly in the grass below the Closed Fist. And the sense of peace inside her was fragile; it would collapse if she let herself get caught up in the anxiety of Houseldon’s defenders, if she let herself get caught up in her own concern for Geraden. Sleep, that was what she needed, not all this talk. In the morning, she would be readier – maybe braver.
Nodding to the servants she encountered along the way, she retreated to Artagel’s room.
It was dark. For a moment, she thought about asking someone for help; then she remembered where one of the room’s lamps was. On a small table at the head of the bed. She went to it by the light from the open door, picked it up and brought it back to the doorway. Another lamp hung on the wall outside; she used it to light the lamp in her hands. When it was burning brightly, she entered the room again and closed the door.
A second lamp lit from the first helped fill the room with a comforting yellow glow. Amazing how nice Artagel’s cot looked in that light. She visited the bathroom, then took off her clothes and doused the lamp she had set across the room. The early spring chill in the air encouraged her to get into bed immediately, cover herself with clean sheets and sweet blankets.
At once, she knew she was right: this was what she needed. As soon as her head reached the pillow, the peace inside her seemed to rise up and swell outward. It reached through the house growing quiet around her; it reached out to Geraden and the men trying to plan Houseldon’s survival; it reached up into the deep heavens and across the Care toward Domne’s mountains.
Silence and rest spread so far in all directions that they carried her away.
She went to sleep in such sudden contentment that she forgot to extinguish the lamp on the small table at the head of the bed.
That was what saved her from rousing the household and embarrassing herself unnecessarily, that forgotten lamp. In the dark, she might have lost her head; might have screamed.
For the second time in her life, after she had been asleep for a while she felt herself being kissed.
A strong mouth began to nibble on her lips; a tongue slipped between them, searching for hers. A hand just cool enough to call attention to itself found her hip under the blankets, then rose in a long caress across her belly to her breasts. While the tongue probed her mouth more deeply, the hand began to play with her nipples.
Her eyes flew open. In one quick glimpse, she saw the curly hair and intent brown eyes of the man kneeling beside the cot to embrace her; she saw that he wasn’t Master Eremis or Castellan Lebbick, wasn’t Gilbur or anyone else who terrified her. So she didn’t scream. Instead, she swung her arms with all her strength in an effort to fling him away.
One of her elbows caught him squarely on the collarbone.
With a muffled yelp, he fell off her, sprawled to the floor. His arms tried to protect the bandages over his ribs and around his shoulders, but the fall sent a jolt through his fractured bones. For a moment, his back arched in real pain. Then he went limp on the floorboards.
Looking up at her and panting carefully as the pain receded, he murmured, “Terisa,” in a wounded tone, “what’re you doing? I just want to make love to you. You don’t need to hurt me.”
Now that she could see his whole face, she couldn’t mistake his resemblance to the rest of the Domne’s sons. Judging by his bandages, his cracked or broken ribs and collarbone, his crooked features, he must be Stead.
Glaring down at him angrily, she said the first thing that came into her head. “I thought you had too many broken bones to get out of bed.”
He gave up sounding wounded and experimented with a smile instead. “So did I. But that was before I saw you in the hall – outside my door. So I waited until everyone was asleep. Then I gave it a try. I guess a man can stand almost anything if he wants to badly enough.”
When she didn’t reply, he asked, “Will you help me up? I really am hurt, and the floor is hard.”
Fortunately, he was wearing a pair of light cotton sleeping trousers below his bandages. If he had been naked, she might have had trouble keeping her composure. Under the circumstances, however, she was able to look at him squarely and say, “If you try to get up, I’m going to kick you until you wish you hadn’t.”
But as soon as she said that she nearly started laughing. She had once threatened to kick Geraden. In fact, she had kicked him. To make him stop apologizing.
“That isn’t kind,” Stead protested. His expression was lugubrious for a moment. But then another thought occurred to him, and he grinned. “On the other hand, it might be worth it. You won’t be able to get out of that bed to kick me without letting me see what you look like. The way you walk makes me think you must look glorious.” His grin sharpened. “I’ve never been turned down by a woman who let me catch even a glimpse of her breasts.”
“In that case” – her desire to laugh was getting stronger – “I won’t kick you. I won’t get out of bed at all.” Stead looked astonishingly like Geraden trying to do an imitation of Master Eremis – with limited success. Keeping herself carefully covered with her blankets, she sat up and indicated the lamp. “I’ll just throw burning oil at you.”
Stead didn’t appear to take this threat very seriously. “No, you won’t.”
In an effort to stifle her mirth, she glowered back at him. “What makes you think that?”
“You don’t really want to hurt me.” With no arrogance at all, he explained, “What you really want is a man.”
She stared at him. “I do?”
He nodded. “Every woman does. That’s what men and women are for. First they want each other. Then they get into bed and enjoy each other.”
That sounded dangerously plausible. She countered by asking, “What about Geraden? He’s your brother, after all. And I came here with him. Don’t you consider him a man?”
“Ah, Geraden.” Stead’s smile seemed genuinely affectionate. “Of course I consider him a man. If you want my opinion, he’s the best one of us all. Oh, he isn’t half the farmer Tholden is. He isn’t half the shepherd Wester is. He isn’t half the swordsman Artagel is. And he sure doesn’t know anything about women. But he’s still the best.
“But that’s not the point, is it?” he continued rhetorically. It was remarkable how little arrogance he had in him, how little assumption of superiority. He didn’t belittle anyone. “The point is, you don’t consider him a man.”
Terisa’s mouth fell open. She closed it with an effort. Suddenly, the situation wasn’t funny anymore. “I don’t?”
“You came here with him. He worships every inch of you. If you thought of him as a man, you’d be in his room right now.” Nothing in Stead’s tone suggested the slightest criticism of Geraden – or of her. His view of the situation was essentially impersonal.
“There must be someone else you want.”
Holding her gaze, he began to ease himself up from the floor. Every moment was obviously painful to him, but the pain only accentuated the appeal in his eyes.
“I think you want me,” he murmured. “I certainly want you.”
There was something of Master Eremis in the way he looked at her, an intensity of interest which hypnotized. And he had distinct advantages over the Master. He wouldn’t demean her. He wouldn’t do anything cruel.