“Zach,” she cried, pink heels clattering as she ran farther out onto the dock.
She wore a soft pink dress. The bodice clung and its skirt swirled around her hips. Once he’d accused her of dressing to be desirable. Well, today she’d given it her best shot. She’d gone shopping and had deliberately picked a sexy dress for this confrontation.
All the men stopped talking at once. She let her pashmina slide to her shoulders.
Jaws fell. Zach spun, then hissed in a breath at the sight of her. Even though his eyes went icy and hard, she’d seen the split-second spark of attraction her appearance had caused. She’d caught him off guard in front of his men, exposed his vulnerability, and she knew he hated that.
Grief that he was hers no longer, that she couldn’t run into his arms, slashed through her like a knife.
He didn’t look as sure or confident as he had the last time she’d seen him. His face was thinner; his eyes shadowed.
“Get her out of here,” he ordered, his frigid voice radiating antagonism.
“Sorry, Mr. Torr. Ma’am, I’m gonna have to ask you to leave,” the burly man said behind her.
She had only seconds before she’d be forced to go.
“Zach,” she cried. “I’ve got to talk to you.”
“Too bad. I’m in a meeting.” Slamming on a pair of dark glasses, he turned away.
The burly man grabbed her arm and began to tug her gently in the direction of the exit. “Please, ma’am…”
Frantic, she struggled to free herself. “Zach… You’ve got to listen to me.”
The man’s grip hardened. “Come on, ma’am.”
“Zach! Please!”
His face tight and determined, Zach tapped his pen against his clipboard and continued to ignore her.
She didn’t want to tell him like this-not when he was surrounded by other people. She didn’t. But what were her choices?
“Zach, I’m pregnant!”
Zach had selected the elegant office onboard his ship as a place where they could be alone, but the space felt cramped and airless to Summer as Zach subjected her to a thorough, intimate appraisal. Never had she found his arresting face more handsome, but when she searched its hard, angular planes for a trace of sympathy, she found none.
His eyes were so intense and cold, they made her feel almost faint with grief.
“Zach…” For a second, everything in her vision darkened except his face, which blurred in swirling pinpricks of light.
His hard arms reached for her, steadied her, led her to a chair, where she gulped in a sweet breath of air.
“Are you okay?” he demanded.
“I-I’m fine.”
He stood over her, watching her carefully to make sure.
“Zach, I didn’t want to tell you the news like that…in front of your men…when you were so furious. But I had to tell you face-to-face. I didn’t want to leave a message with your secretary, or for some reporter to accost you with questions because I was having our child.”
“Oh, really? You didn’t bother to tell me the last time you were pregnant. Are you eager to share this child with me since I’ve got money now? And when do you intend to tell the press, so as to heighten your box-office draw? Frankly, I’m surprised you didn’t bring the hounds with you today.”
Again Zach’s eyes had become emotionless. She felt as if her heart were freezing and dying. It was as if, instead of her, he saw some cruel, cunning stranger.
She took a deep breath. “No… Why would I… You can’t, you can’t believe I’m that low.”
“You’re wrong.”
“I want to protect our baby. And I have my own income, I’ll have you know. So, money is the last thing I need from you.”
“I’ll set up an account and do what’s necessary. But the less I see or hear from you, the better. In the future, my lawyers will talk to your lawyers. I’ll want to see our child rather frequently, I’m afraid. As you know, I’m sorely lacking in close family. And as I distrust the mother, I’ll need to be as big an influence in his life as possible if he’s to have a fighting chance. And I repeat, I will see to it that these matters are arranged so that we meet as infrequently as possible.”
“I-I know how you must feel…finding out the way you did…about our first baby. You must think me truly awful…”
“No! You don’t know how I feel! You couldn’t possibly imagine.”
For a moment his hard face was expressionless. Then he shook his head. “You don’t understand me at all.”
“I know I didn’t stand up for you the way you wanted me to when my stepfather brought charges against you. You thought I went along with him, but I didn’t. I loved you. I still do.”
“Don’t use that four-letter word. You say it too easily. All it’s ever been for me is a one-way ticket to hell.”
“Zach, I was sixteen…pregnant…terrified…of him and of the accusations, of all the ugliness. I was so confused. Hysterical, really.”
“It doesn’t matter anymore,” he said in a weary, defeated tone.
But it did matter to her, fiercely. She’d thought she’d learned to live with her regrets, then he’d come back into her life and made her love him again. Being with him right now, when he was so distant, knowing that he was shutting her out forever, made her want to confess everything, to finally share all the regrets she’d carried alone for so long.
She’d organized a funeral for their first baby, had attended it by herself in the rain. Her mother, who would have come, had been too ill to leave Bonne Terre. Gram had been caring for Summer’s mother, and Tuck had been too young to be of any comfort. Summer had stayed in the cemetery until she’d been drenched, until the last clod of dirt had been thrown, until a compassionate grave digger had plucked a single white rose from the funeral wreath she’d bought and handed the dripping blossom to her.
“Press this in that Bible you be carrin’, cher. And go home. You can’t do any good here. The little one, she’s in heaven now.”
Summer had placed angels on the grave.
Somehow she swallowed her tears when she came back to the present. “I went to Houston when I was nearly five months along. I tried to talk to you, to find you, but you wouldn’t see me.”
“Because I knew you were manipulating me.”
“But I tried to tell you about the baby. I really tried.”
“Not hard enough apparently. You could have told somebody else… My uncle, maybe. He would have gotten the message to me. But you didn’t.”
“I was out of money. I wasn’t feeling so well. I-I thought it was no use, so I went back to New Orleans. I-I lost the baby the next week. I was all alone. I wanted you so desperately. I never wanted you with me more.”
A muscle in his carved cheek jerked savagely, but when he spoke, his voice was low, contemptuous.
“You didn’t do anything deliberate to bring about that unhappy event, did you?”
“What?” His words hit her like a blow. Once again his face swirled in blackness. If she’d been standing, she would have fallen. Only with the greatest effort did she manage to catch her breath.
“No.” The single word was a prayer asking him to believe her. The single tear that traced down her cheek spoke the truth.
Not that he could see the truth, blinded as he was by his own fury and sense of betrayal.
“You damn sure know how to deliver a line.” His low voice was hoarse. “I’ll give you that. You need to remember that little trick for the stage, sweetheart. It was very effective.”
“Okay. I understand,” she whispered. “You’ll never trust me again. Or forgive me.”
“You’ve got that right. The sooner we finish this conversation, the sooner we can get on with our separate lives. I said I’d help you with the baby, and I will. You don’t look well. I want you to take better care of yourself this time. Cut back on your schedule. You can’t possibly do eight shows a week. I’ll pay for the best doctors…anything you need. And I want to be there when you deliver. Not for your sake, but for the baby’s.”