Yesterday, his being overly aware that Elizabeth was just a few yards away had distracted him from business, causing the meeting to last longer than it should have. However, the fact that he managed to remain in his study proved his strength of will had not completely abandoned him, which was certainly beneficial to his mental state.
Though, all these efforts might have been undone, for, when the ladies had remained so late to finish the handkerchiefs, he had not been able to stop himself from inviting them to linger long enough to partake in a light supper, realizing it was only good manners to do so.
Darcy shook his head. That was not entirely accurate. While it was true the invitation had been the polite thing to offer, looking back, he could not deem it merely good etiquette. Even though he himself had been hungry at the time, he had been more starved for Elizabeth’s company than for food.
However, during supper last evening, he had, once and for all, determined Miss Bennet was, in fact, emotionally invested in her relationship with Bingley. Therefore, Darcy had no further reason to be present while the ladies prepared the gifts for the children.
Oh, who was he trying to deceive? He had no good motive to spend time with Elizabeth any longer.
Except for one, which he formed in the middle of the previous, sleepless night.
At first light this morning, he had written to Bingley and asked him to meet him here at half past eleven. It would be rude to simply send him in to help the ladies without offering his own assistance, as well. Additionally, he did enjoy preparing for the celebration at the orphanage; he had been involved whenever he could over the years.
A few minutes ago, when he heard the ladies make their way into the parlour, it had taken a great amount of self-control not to rush down the corridor to greet them. However, he could not simply send Bingley into the parlour without providing some sort of warning—he had to make certain his friend was up for it.
A knock on the door startled him from his ruminations.
Feeling restless, Darcy opened the door himself. “Good morning, Bingley. Thank you for coming.”
Bingley’s lips turned up at the corners, but the smile did not reach the poor man’s eyes. In fact, his eyes… Darcy had never seen such deep sorrow.
Dismay filled his soul. How had Darcy and this man’s sisters believed they were in the right about what they had done to this kind-hearted soul?
Darcy could correct this. He would do so this very minute.
“What did you need to speak to me about, Darcy?”
Bingley had come straight to the point, with none of his usual, cheerful chatter, which proved beyond any doubt that Bingley’s condition was worse than Darcy could have guessed.
Darcy cleared his throat. “Georgiana and I, along with others, are preparing gifts for the Saint Nicholas Day celebration at the orphanage.”
“Is it that time of year already?” Bingley lifted a paperweight on Darcy’s desk and examined it, then looked up quickly. “Do you need my help with something? It would do me a great service if you put me to work, Darcy. I will do anything.” His face reddened. “I know I sound desperate, but I am having some difficulties keeping busy enough...” his voice trailed off.
Darcy almost chuckled. When Caroline Bingley had informed Darcy that they would need to work together to keep her brother occupied so his mind would not stray to thoughts of Miss Jane Bennet, it had been well within range of Bingley’s hearing. That woman was such a fool.
“Well then, perhaps you can help bundle the gifts for the children. We could use your assistance.”
Bingley looked relieved and attempted a smile once again. “I am certain I could tie a bow well enough to suit even your meticulous expectations.”
Darcy did laugh aloud this time. “Shall we remove to the parlour, then?” He motioned towards the door.
Bingley nodded, and yet Darcy hesitated, hoping Bingley would ask the question he always did before they went anywhere together. It would seem odd if he warned him Miss Bennet was present for no apparent reason. Or perhaps not. Since he was not certain, he felt it best to allow the subject to come up naturally.
“Who will be in attendance?” Bingley asked.
There it was.
Darcy turned and watched Bingley’s face closely as he said, “My aunt, Lady Adelaide, and Georgiana, of course. My sister’s companion, Mrs. Annesley joins us… and two ladies with whom you can claim an acquaintance. Miss Bennet and Miss Elizabeth.”
Bingley froze, then backed up a step. He looked from the closed door back to Darcy. “Are you serious, Darcy? Ja—Miss Bennet is here, in this house? At this very moment?”
Darcy nodded. “Apparently, the Bennets’ aunt is the same Mrs. Gardiner who volunteers at the orphanage. Since she is unexpectedly engaged just now, the Misses Bennet have travelled to London to take her place.” He took a deep breath, bracing himself to make his confession. “I must say I have concluded it is possible your sisters and I were wrong about Miss Bennet’s motives. Either way, we should not have convinced you to abandon your estate in Hertfordshire. That we would warn you of our suspicions was appropriate, but it was reprehensible of us to practically bully you into staying away from the lady. I apologize.”
Bingley’s eyes widened.
Darcy continued, “Not much time has passed since you left Netherfield. Renew the acquaintance, if you wish… but please, Bingley, take care. Keep in mind our uncertainties as you make an informed decision about how to proceed.”
Bingley nodded. “I do wish to see her again.” As he smoothed a stray lock of hair away from his forehead, his friend’s hand shook.
“Then come with me and you shall,” Darcy said, and led the way towards the parlour.
It must have been difficult for Bingley to stand still and listen to his speech whilst knowing the woman he loved was just down the corridor. He found he understood Bingley’s predicament completely. He was living it.
When the thought occurred, it hit him squarely in the chest, and he made an abrupt stop.
I am not in love.
“You, Darcy? In love?” Bingley asked with a bit too much humour in his voice for Darcy’s liking.
Good heavens, had he uttered that thought aloud?
Darcy glanced over at the footman standing outside the parlour door, in time to see him snap his jaw shut and redirect his gaze straight ahead.
Darcy groaned internally. The footman had definitely overheard their conversation. This news would spread all over the household in a matter of minutes if he did not get it under control immediately. The last thing he needed was the housekeeper wishing him joy.
He cleared his throat. “I said I am not—”
Bingley gasped, “Of course! It is Miss Elizabeth, is it not? How could I not have noticed whilst we were in Hertfordshire? But now, thinking back, it is so obvious.”
Darcy refrained from speaking his explanation: Whilst they were at Netherfield, Bingley had been so occupied with Miss Bennet that he had not been in the mindset to notice his surroundings at all. This statement would not have the desired effect; in fact, it would convince Bingley—and the footman—that Darcy did believe himself in love, when, in fact, he knew very well he was merely infatuated with Miss Elizabeth Bennet.
He was definitely not in love.
“There is nothing wrong with admiring a beautiful woman, Bingley. Please, do not read too much into it. It will come to nothing.” He cleared his throat. “Let us join the others.”
As Darcy preceded Bingley into the room, he focused upon Miss Bennet so he could monitor her reaction to his friend’s entrance. Her gaze moved from Darcy to Bingley, and almost instantly, it was as if life was breathed back into her entire being. Light suddenly glowed from her eyes. Colour returned to her face.