Maybe if StarClan had really chosen her …
That’s ridiculous, she scolded herself. StarClan must be only a dream. If they were real, they never would have let Hawkfrost trick Mudfur.
There wasn’t anything she cared about more than keeping her Clanmates strong and healthy. If that didn’t make her a true medicine cat, what would? But she wasn’t ready to do it alone.
As night began to fall, Hawkfrost stuck his head into the medicine den. “I brought you a mouse,” he announced, with a nervous glance at dozing Mudfur.
“Thanks,” Mothwing meowed. “I don’t want to leave him.”
Hawkfrost dropped the mouse in front of her and then hesitated, shifting from one powerful paw to the other. “I was talking to Sasha at the edge of our territory,” he told her slowly.
“Oh, good,” Mothwing replied. A few moons before, Sasha had been captured by Twolegs along with several Clan cats, including Mistyfoot. Some ThunderClan cats had gotten them all free, and Mistyfoot had invited Sasha to visit whenever she wanted. It had been wonderful to see their mother again, even though she wouldn’t stay. Couldn’t stay, not if she wanted to keep the secret that Tigerstar was their father. Too many ShadowClan cats knew that she and Tigerstar had been mates. If ShadowClan knew that Sasha was Mothwing and Hawkfrost’s mother, they might figure out their secret. But it was good to know Sasha was nearby. “Was she okay?”
“Yeah … ,” Hawkfrost began, then looked down. “But Firestar and a couple of other ThunderClan cats saw us. They were coming onto RiverClan territory to talk to Leopardstar. Firestar asked if we were Tigerstar’s kits, and Sasha said yes.”
“What?” Mothwing went cold. “Why would she admit it?”
Hawkfrost hunched his shoulders. “The way he said it … he already knew. I look like Tigerstar, I guess. At least, I look like Brambleclaw. And every cat knows he’s Tigerstar’s son, but he was born in the Clans, so no cat worries about him.”
“They would have found out eventually, I suppose,” Mothwing mewed dully. Hawkfrost and Brambleclaw did look a lot alike. “Do we have to leave?”
RiverClan wouldn’t want Tigerstar’s kits, she was sure of it. They still talked about the cats he’d killed, the terrible things he’d done as he rose to power. They used his name to frighten naughty kits, as if he were a monster or a fox.
“Maybe not.” Hawkfrost came closer and touched his nose to her cheek, gently. “I don’t think Firestar will tell any cat or let the cats he was with tell anyone. I think he’s known for a long time.”
Mothwing’s belly was heavy with dread. “But if they do …”
Hawkfrost extended his long claws, digging them into the ground. “I’m RiverClan’s strongest warrior,” he insisted. “If anyone tries to turn against us, they’ll be sorry.” Mudfur shifted restlessly in his sleep, and Hawkfrost glanced at him again. “I’d better go.”
Mothwing nodded, distracted, as he left the medicine den. Everything was falling apart.
A small sound came from Mudfur’s nest, and Mothwing looked up to see his eyes open and fixed on her. What if he heard? she thought, dismayed. Would he still want her as his apprentice, if he knew she was Tigerstar’s kit?
“Mudfur?” she asked. The brown tom made a strange wheezing noise and tried to climb to his paws. He looked worried, not angry. He made it halfway up and then fell back into his nest, gasping.
“Mudfur!” Mothwing forgot about Hawkfrost and Tigerstar and ran to her mentor’s side. His eyes were fixed on hers, and he seemed to be struggling to speak, but only a thick gargling noise came out. “Where does it hurt?” she asked. “What do you need?”
Mudfur gagged. A string of bile ran from the corner of his mouth and he panted, gasping for breath. Mothwing pressed her paw against his side, feeling how shallow his breathing was. “Help!” she called. “Help!”
After what seemed like an endless moment, a pounding of paws came from outside, and Blackclaw and Swallowtail dashed into the medicine den. Blackclaw’s apprentice, Volepaw, was close on their tails. “Get Leopardstar!” Mothwing snapped at them, and Volepaw doubled back out of the entrance, running hard.
A few heartbeats later, Leopardstar pushed her way between the warriors and stared down at Mudfur, horror in her amber eyes. “What’s wrong with him?”
Mudfur gagged again, his thin body trembling uncontrollably.
“I don’t know,” Mothwing wailed. “He … he’s been ill and he just fell and can’t seem to catch his breath or talk. I’ve been giving him poppy seeds and feverfew and—”
Leopardstar cut her off. “Will he recover?” Her meow was calm, but something in it reminded Mothwing that Mudfur was not only Leopardstar’s medicine cat, but her father. If Mudfur died, it would be a terrible blow to their leader.
“I don’t know,” Mothwing repeated, feeling helpless. “I’ve been doing all I can, but … I might need advice from a more experienced medicine cat.” She felt ashamed. “Can I ask Cinderpelt for help?”
Leopardstar nodded. “ThunderClan’s camp is at Sunningrocks now. Go as fast as you can. I will stay with Mudfur.”
Outside, there was enough moonlight to guide Mothwing’s paws as she raced out of camp and toward the river’s edge. I’ll find Leafpaw first, she decided. She likes me, and she’s Firestar’s daughter. She’ll get him to let Cinderpelt come.
She waded into the shallow river, heading for Sunningrocks on the other side. In the moonlight, she could see ThunderClan cats curled on the bare surface of the rocks, sleeping. They would be leaving the forest soon: their camp had been destroyed. There was nothing left for them here.
What if Mudfur dies? Mothwing felt cold with dread and grief. Mudfur was old and sick; he might not survive. If the RiverClan medicine cat died, and the other Clans left, she would have to take care of RiverClan alone. I’m not ready.
If she had been chosen by StarClan, maybe she would be ready by now. Maybe she would automatically know what to do. Mothwing splashed her paws a little more firmly through the water. She had been working hard. No cat would know more than she did after so little training. But the lingering thought remained, no matter how she tried to shake it away: If they’re real, StarClan is punishing me. But even if that was true, she couldn’t let Mudfur down. He’d had faith in her abilities and had suffered the Clan’s anger because of it. That was reason enough for her to stay and become the medicine cat Mudfur seemed so sure she could be. She would start by using everything he’d taught her to take care of him. Come what may, Mothwing resolved to make her mentor proud.
Mudfur lay in the center of the medicine clearing, his sides barely moving with slow, shallow breaths. Rain ran through the branches above onto his flank, but he didn’t flinch or try to move away. Mothwing had tried to move him to his nest when the rain started, but he had whimpered like a hurt kit, and she hadn’t had the heart to keep trying.
For a few sunrises after Cinderpelt and Leafpaw’s visit, Mudfur had rallied, getting back on his paws and moving slowly around the medicine den as Mothwing had fed him herbs to ease his pain and stave off infection.
At the same time, things had been going from bad to worse in the territory outside their medicine den. WindClan was almost starving. The river had gotten lower and lower; the cats had discovered that the Twolegs had diverted the water away. When ShadowClan’s camp had been destroyed in front of the Clans’ eyes, Leopardstar had decided that it was too dangerous for even RiverClan to remain. All four Clans would leave together to find a new home.