Harry tried to get himself under control. "Uh, yeah, sort of, I guess," he managed between chuckles. "Never heard anyone use that word, though." Another fit of laughter had him collapsing to his side on the bed. "You know what? We're half-brothers! 'Cause I'm only half-Slytherin! Or maybe we're st- stepbrothers," he gasped. "'Cause I'm joining the, uh, family 'bout five years late--"
And then the laughter shook the foundation of his soul, the sensation veering on hysteria as inside his mind, the words merrily trilled, Snape's not going to adopt Draco, Snape's never going to adopt Draco, we'll never ever ever be brothers! Snape's going to be my guardian, not his, I won't have to share, never ever ever!
It was like a bad dream had suddenly faded completely from view.
Which, of course, it had.
"Harry, you forgot your-- Merlin, what is going on in here?" Snape's sharp voice inquired.
Shakily pushing himself back into an upright sitting position, Harry saw his teacher standing in the doorway, a copy of the contract in his hand. He tried to talk, to explain, but too much humor was still bubbling up inside his throat.
"He thinks being in Slytherin as well as Gryffindor is bloody hilarious," Draco announced, snorting.
"What's funny about it?" Snape challenged, his voice edged with offense.
That quieted Harry's laughter, although not for long. "Um, I was just imagining wearing maroon and silver and gold and green all at once," he hastily invented. The story spilled past its boundaries before he could stop it. "See, I thought Dobby could maybe cobble scarves together for me, oh, and I'd have to wear mismatched socks, and maybe I could split a couple of ties up the center and glue both halves together--"
"Just add a snake to the crest on your cloak and be done with it!" Draco erupted. "There's no need to go around looking all stupid, Potter!"
"Ten points from Slytherin," Snape sighed, waving his wand. "Really, I thought you two were past this squabbling."
"Malfoy just doesn't like my fashion sense," Harry returned, throwing out the name deliberately to see what would happen.
"And ten from Gryffindor," Snape added, with another flick of his wand. Then his face went still, as though he was listening to something far, far away. He closed his eyes in concentration. "The counters," he groaned. "I hadn't realized."
"What?" Harry prompted, though he had a suspicion he might know, already.
Snape glared at him. "They took ten from Slytherin. And then, they took five each from Gryffindor and Slytherin because they knew I'd docked points on your account."
Harry burst out laughing again. He'd wondered what this be-in-two-Houses arrangement would do to the point counters. Now, he knew.
"It's not funny!" Draco objected. "And why would that happen, anyway? The adoption's not official until tomorrow, Harry said!"
"I signed a magically binding contract," Snape announced. "I don't need some Ministry adjunct to make things official in my mind. That's why." He handed Harry his copy of the contract. "Put that somewhere safe. After the seal's appeared, you should safeguard it in your vault."
Still outraged, Draco complained, "If we fight and you dock us both like usual, it'll sink Slytherin through the floor, and hardly even dent Gryffindor! Harry here could sabotage the whole House system!"
Snape barely spared a glance for Harry. "He could, but he won't."
"Why wouldn't he?" Draco demanded, baring his teeth.
"Because he's a Gryffindor, too," Snape announced, and not in tones of disdain. Harry liked that. "Harry. Given how the House counters have just behaved, I think the warding spells will take root, now. We will perform them tonight. Would you let your cousin know?" His sneering expression said more clearly than words that he did not particularly care to have the Muggle boy asleep on his couch in the middle of the afternoon.
"Okay, sure," Harry said, smoothing out the adoption contract and looking at it.
Draco shifted restlessly on his feet, then suddenly bolted from the room, calling back that he had a Potion to finish.
"And there I thought he was so caught up in this mysterious Herbology project," Harry lightly joked. "He doesn't have a Potion brewing. If he did, you'd be starting in on a lecture about not leaving it unattended."
"He obviously wishes some time alone," Snape pointed out, his black gaze narrowing on Harry. "I may not have agreed with Thistlethorne's remedy, but her analysis of the situation was not to be faulted." His gaze fell on the adoption contract. "Don't flaunt that. Put it away as I said."
"I wanted to wait to see the seal appear--"
"Put it away."
Harry nodded. "Yes, sir."
Snape looked like he might say something more, but in the end, he merely muttered that he had work to do in his classroom, and swept out the door.
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"Your friends came by," Dudley mentioned over dinner. "The red-headed boy was really angry that Draco wouldn't let him see you."
"You and Severus were in with the casewitch," Draco calmly explained, elegantly spearing a butterflied shrimp. "I thought better than to interrupt."
Harry couldn't argue with that. "So, Ron and who else?"
"Granger, Longbottom, and one of the Patil girls; I've no idea which."
"Okay, I'll owl them," Harry decided.
"Going to tell them all about recent developments?" Draco inquired, silver eyes cool as they studied Harry.
"Yes, of course!" Harry snapped, but at a glare from Snape, added in a more neutral tone, "Not in a letter, though, I don't think. Ah... what did you tell them?"
"That you were busy," Draco drawled.
"Too busy to see them," Dudley added. "The red-haired boy didn't believe that, though. He called Draco a lying snake. Then the bushy-haired girl told him to calm down, and the other girl tried to step across the threshold and got a nasty shock and said she knew they shouldn't try to visit Harry here, and couldn't he come eat in the Great Hall or something, and then Draco said she was stupid to try to enter without being invited in, and didn't she think that a teacher would know how to ward his own quarters--"
"Thanks, Dudley," Harry cut him off. Snape was glowering already, and rather than add to the negative mood by rounding on Draco, Harry decided to just let the matter go. They were going to redo the warding spells after dinner, after all. It was better for Snape to be calm. Or at least Harry figured that was probably true; he didn't really know.
Hmm, maybe that was why his own magic wasn't working? Because every time he tried a spell he felt frantic inside, worried that it might not work, anxious that he'd never get his powers back?
Later that evening, Harry wasn't sure just how calm Snape might be, but the warding spells worked as expected. His teacher knelt, calling forth all his powers to hold the spells in place, and Dudley vowed he would willingly give his blood to protect Harry. And this time, when Dudley's blood dripped down into the glowing silvery-gold orb Snape held aloft, the spells caught it and bonded it to the very fabric of the magic.
The orb turned swirling crimson, and then began to shimmer a dark, iridescent green. And then it exploded, spraying outward to coat the walls, floor, and ceiling anew, the spells reaching into every room, even flowing into the Floo and up the chimney past Harry's line of sight.
Snape rose shakily to his feet, and staggered slightly, but this time, he wasn't cursing. He looked satisfied. "It's done," he said, before making his way to a chair and all but collapsing.