"I don't believe you will, no," Snape put in, his voice composed. "Esprit de corps is all well and good, but in this instance, you can't do Mr. Weasley's learning for him."
"Look, I know you hate him, but--"
"Mr. Potter," Snape remarked, a layer of frost coating his words, "being my son doesn't give you carte blanche to criticize me, especially in the presence of third parties. There is such a thing as filial respect."
"I'm going before I start casting Unforgivables!" Ron screeched, and then he was running down the hall, not even bothering to close the door.
Snape closed it for him with a laconic wave of his wand.
Harry drew in a breath. "Well. He's gone now, so let's hash this out. What the hell do you think you're doing? You can't expel Ron!"
"Actually, I can," Snape returned, still with that same cold calm.
"Ron's done a ton for this school," Harry said firmly. "Dumbledore will never stand for this."
"Oh, no? Let's review the facts, shall we?" Snape favored Harry with a thin smile. "One, Ronald Weasley is not the projected savior of wizardkind who must be shielded from outside danger at all cost. He is most decidedly not immune to expulsion. Two, he grossly slandered a faculty member in the presence of other students, no less. Shocking behavior. Three, though I was entirely reasonable and proposed an alternative to expulsion, he has refused to do it to my satisfaction."
"Your so-called alternative was crap and you know it!" Harry shouted. "And what's more, it's not like Ron spread his comments around the entire school! It was just down here, just that once, and then he buttoned his lip up tight! And nobody believed him anyway, so it didn't do your reputation or your career any harm at all!"
"His comments were slanderous, all the same."
"If you expelled every student who slandered you, half the school would be gone by now! We all thought you were an evil bastard hell-bent on helping Voldemort! You did everything you could to make us think that, so of course we slandered you!"
"As you say, students were meant to think that. The misdirection suited the Order's needs. Anyone intelligent enough to form conclusions was going to form the ones we wanted."
"It started way back before the Order needed to misdirect anybody! And speaking of the Order, the Weasleys will have your head if you expel him. And so will Dumbledore, just like I said!" Harry folded his arms in front of his chest and glared triumphantly in Snape's direction.
The Potions Master didn't look worried in the slightest. He didn't even raise his voice, though it did hold quite a sneer as he announced, "I quite assure you, the headmaster will see things my way no matter what arguments Arthur and Molly Weasley may bring to bear. Potions Masters are notoriously difficult to engage. Very few have the patience to deal with children--"
"Yeah, including you!" Harry put in.
Snape completely ignored the interruption to continue, "Albus Dumbledore certainly needs me more than he needs the goodwill of a minor official in the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts Department."
"All right, maybe it's within your power to to expel Ron," Harry acknowledged, going to stand right before Snape. "But don't, please," he entreated, looking up, green eyes intense. "For me. He's my friend."
"He," Snape stressed, "is no friend at all."
"He is, but even if you don't think so, that's beside the point. What counts is that I'm still his friend, Professor." Reaching out, Harry rested his palms on Snape's forearms. "So I'm asking. I'll beg if that's what you want. Don't expel Ron, sir. Please, please don't. For me."
Something like regret filled Snape's eyes, telling Harry even before the man spoke what his answer would be. "This isn't a matter for you to decide," he announced, shaking off Harry's touch. "I can't abide open defiance. If you'll excuse me, I do believe the expulsion paperwork awaits me in my classroom office."
As Snape Flooed away, Draco burst out into raucous laughter.
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"Shut up, it isn't funny!" Harry immediately objected.
"The fuck it isn't funny," Draco retorted, still laughing. "The little shite should have been expelled when he tried to make me eat slugs, but no, everybody decided that his hex backfiring was punishment enough. I've been waiting for this day for years!"
Harry narrowed his eyes in warning, but Draco wasn't deterred in the slightest. "I wonder if the house-elves will send up some champagne if I say we've cause for celebration," he mused.
"You're so hateful!" Harry cried.
"It's his own Gryffindorishness getting him into hot water," Draco said, laughing even harder at the word he'd coined. "All that insistence that life should be fair. Well, it isn't fair! If it was, you wouldn't have lived all those years with people who hated you, and I wouldn't have lost the lion's share of my money when I made the choice to side against my father. Weasley needs to grow up. Hell, anybody with half a brain would just have written the next ten thousand and be done with it. If he's stupid enough to throw away his education, he's too stupid to be here, anyway!"
"Ron doesn't deserve what Snape's decided to do!"
Something flashed in Draco's eyes. Something ugly. "Oh, you want to discuss what people deserve, do you? What about what Severus deserves from you? You said you believed Weasley over him!"
"I did not! Snape didn't deny the paper was hexed!"
"You took a Weasel's side, over that of your father and Head of House!" Draco raged on, stomping up to yell straight into Harry's face. "Your behavior about this whole detention issue has been disgusting from start to finish! I've lost track of the times you've tried to get Severus to lighten Weasley's punishment!"
"Because it was unreasonable!"
"No, it wasn't. It was merciful, you idiot! Severus generously let Weasley write lines instead of expelling him forthwith, and why do you think that was? Because the Weasel is such a good friend of mine? Shite, Harry, Severus did you a huge favor and what did you do? You argued with him for weeks, called him an arse to his face, and when it came right down to it, took sides against him!"
"I stood up for what was right!" Harry shouted. "Ten thousand lines is bloody vengeful, that's what it is!"
"Oh yeah? Well what do you think would happen to me if I accused McGonagall of shagging a student in her spare time?" Draco grimly nodded at the look that crossed Harry's face. "Brings it home, does it?" he sniped. "You can't imagine her merely assigning lines, can you?"
"No," Harry admitted.
"Well, there you have it," Draco pronounced. "Severus stood up for you, so to speak, and I for one don't blame him in the least if he's decided it just wasn't worth it. You chose Weasley over the man who rearranged his whole life to help you, then let you in it! You don't deserve to be his son!"
"You're just jealous," Harry accused.
"Jealous, of you?" Draco scoffed. "Of a Gryffindor so cowardly that he has to be bribed before he'll try the slightest trace of magic on his own? I might burn up!!!" he mimicked Harry's worries, saying them in a high, girlish voice. "Yeah, I'm jealous. I really, really wish I made a habit of stomping all over Severus every chance I get, right. I wish I was so effing stupid it took me weeks to identify a few plants, or that I was pathetic enough to make a sodding snake my closest confidant while I completely ignored a father who clearly wanted to be there for me--"