“Their stupidity is my gain.” He stuffed an olive into his mouth. When he licked the oily dressing off his lips, he saw Avery’s gaze linger on his mouth. Easy, Grey.
“I see you as an entrepreneur, not a ski bum.” She hugged her knees to her chest. “I envy you, actually. I’ve been saving up for four years to start my own clinic, so one day I can be my own boss, too.”
Determined to keep this date light, Grey ignored the reminder of their uncertain financial futures, and teased her. “Like Donner?”
“Only better.” When she winked, Grey chuckled.
“Naturally.” Setting his empty plate aside, he nudged closer to her and brushed his fingers along her thigh. “Did you like growing up here?” He waved his arm over the surroundings.
“I did.” She glanced around at the new grass, budding trees, and river. “I love it here. In fact, my reluctance to leave is part of what came between Matt and me.”
“Huh. Again, his stupidity is my gain.” Grey didn’t really want to hear about her relationship with Matt. “So you want to stay in your hometown. Do you like living with your brother?”
As soon as the words were out, he regretted bringing up Andy and their home. Idiot!
She glanced away, obviously uncomfortable talking about Andy or their home with him. “We get along really well, actually.” She ran her hands up and down her calves. “Although, if I’m being honest, that’s probably because he’s usually happy to go along with whatever I want. He’s more quiet and sensitive than me. In that way, he’s a lot like my mom.”
Grateful for a chance to move away from that hot topic, he picked up on her last comment.
“So are you like your dad?” He watched her expression swiftly turn to a deep frown.
“Not willingly.” Her lip curled.
“Oh, really.” He popped up higher on his arm, eager to dig into the crack he’d just found. “Now that sounds interesting.”
“It’s so not interesting.” When Grey shot her a look, she continued. “Let’s just say my dad isn’t the world’s warmest, most patient man.”
“So you weren’t the apple of his eye?” Slowly the puzzle pieces began fitting together—her wariness with men, her need for control. A beat of silence passed, except for the puffing of Shaman’s breath as he chewed on the dog treats.
“My dad’s always been proud of me. He loves me.” Avery watched Shaman trot over to the boulders. “He’s just . . . demanding.”
“What about your mom?”
“She’s been a doting mother and wife.” Avery’s tone indicated her remark had not been much of a compliment.
“Isn’t a doting mom a good thing?”
“When you’re a kid, sure. But sometimes, as much as I love and appreciate her, I feel like I don’t really know her—the real her. Honestly, I wonder if she even knows herself. She’s made my dad, Andy, and me the focal point of her life. Her friends were the mothers of Andy’s and my friends, her outside activities involved school volunteering or the bridge club my dad wanted to join. From my perspective, she gave up her own identity for most of her adult life.
“Now she’s in her late fifties without anything of her own. She’s totally under my dad’s thumb. I hate that, and then I feel guilty about my anger, because she’s been so loving.” Avery picked at some grass, her gaze hardening. “I doubt I could ever be like her—sacrificing everything that makes me who I am just to please everyone else. If that’s what it takes to be loved or make love last, then I guess I’ll be on my own.” She looked at Grey, her expression solemn. “See why my former boyfriends weren’t so stupid after all?”
“All relationships are different; some better than others. It’s up to the people involved to figure out what works for them.” He narrowed his gaze. “But just because you wouldn’t make your mom’s choices doesn’t mean she’s unhappy with them.”
“I hope she’s content. She doesn’t have many options at this point.” Avery twisted her mouth in a grim mood. “Enough about my family. Tell me about yours.”
The thought of his mom always made him smile. “My mom is exactly how you’d picture a music teacher. Loves kids. Loves music. Creative and caring. Laughs easily—and bakes some wicked-good cakes and cookies. You can pretty much blame her for my sugar addiction.” He paused and rolled onto his back, looking at the sky but seeing his childhood living room in his mind. “My dad is affectionate with her. They have a strong marriage. But he was tough on me. He had a hard time with my dyslexia, mostly because he worried about my future. Then, after Juliette died and I took off, well, he felt like I abandoned them.”
Grey looked over at Avery before continuing.
“He’s never really forgiven me for leaving. He couldn’t understand why I didn’t want to stay there surrounded by memories because, as he put it, a lot of them were good ones.” Grey’s chest constricted slightly, but he rubbed it away. “Then, when his dad died and left me his money, my using it to buy a business here instead of around Lake Tahoe was another nail in my coffin. Now he’s convinced I’ll lose everything. To him, my dyslexia means I can’t run a business. But I’ve learned a ton about the industry from working with so many outfits at so many resorts. And Trip is a huge help with the paperwork.”
He aimed for confidence, but really, Grey had no fallback position. Worst-case scenario—his lack of education, dyslexia, and inability to ski or climb would relegate him to a dreary future working minimum-wage jobs.
Grey’d bet his entire inheritance on making Backtrax work. He rubbed the space above his injured knee. “I know I can do this. I have to make it work, if for no other reason than to avoid the ‘I told you so’s.’”
Avery shivered as a strong breeze rustled the leaves of the nearby branches. Grey tugged her down alongside his body and wrapped one arm around her shoulders. Holding her close distracted him from his worries.
She set her chin on his chest. “You’re disciplined, Grey. I have faith in you.”
He smiled while playfully touching the tip of her nose. “Hopefully that faith extends to more than Backtrax. I want you to have faith in me as a man you can trust. One who isn’t interested in changing you or holding you back.”
He watched her face twitch. Personal discussions clearly made her jumpy. But she’d only promised him one date, so he had to make it count.
She stared at her fingers as they traced a circle on his chest. “Can I ask you a question about Juliette?”
His stomach tightened. “Sure.”
“What was it about her, exactly, that made you fall so hard?” She glanced at him, then looked away as if she were afraid of the answer.
For someone who didn’t like answering personal questions, Bambi sure could ask the big ones. But feeling the weight of her against his side, and suspecting she felt insecure, made it less painful for Grey to talk about Juliette today.
“It wasn’t any one thing.” He felt himself smile. “More like a million little things and experiences. And youth. Sometimes I’ve wondered, if she and I had met as adults, would we have been as good together? I can’t really answer that question, but I think what made it work for us was mutual respect. I listened to her, and not just to what she said, but how she felt and what she hoped. I supported her dreams, and she did the same for me. We had absolute trust in each other. No secrets. She had my back and I had hers. She truly was my best friend.”
“Sounds nice.”
“It was.” He tilted his head, and decided to unearth more about Avery. “You said something the other day that troubled me.”
“I did?”
“Yeah. You said you’d never felt really loved by any guy.”
Her cheeks turned pink, and not from the breeze. “Do you think I’m pathetic?”
“No. I just can’t believe it.”
“Look at how Matt betrayed me. Though honestly, even though I never hurt him, I didn’t love him deeply. Not the way you loved Juliette, with your whole heart and soul. That’s a connection I’ve never experienced. Maybe it’s just not in the cards for me. I don’t have the best attitude about love.”
Her downcast expression made him want to punch Matt and every other guy who’d disappointed her. “Or maybe you just hadn’t met the right guy until now.”
Her lips quirked. “Until now?”
“Right now.” Then he rolled her onto her back, holding himself above her. “I wouldn’t want you to change a thing.” Before she could respond, he bent his head and kissed her, gently lowering his body against hers. What he would give to make love to her, here and now.
Her hands found their way around his waist and back, and she kissed him back. Tightening and tingles shot through his body and straight to his groin. She felt so good, so right, so everything. He wanted to be the guy who would change her outlook on love. He would be that guy, even if he needed a sledgehammer to break through all her walls.
“Grey,” she panted as his mouth found her collarbone and she tightened her hold on him.
Unfortunately, a loud bark and wet nose descended upon them, killing the moment. Grey pushed himself up on his elbows and grumbled, “I should’ve left Shaman at home.”
“He’s my bodyguard.” Avery reached up to pet the dog under his chin. “Keeps you in line.”
Grey kissed the tip of her nose. “Not for long. He’ll be grounded this evening.”