She was responding to something Ryan had said in her usual exaggerated way. She moved close to him and whispered something in his ear. He laughed and blushed.
I walked out of the arcade and into the heartless wind, while my hopes and dreams turned to ash.
It hit me on the bus ride back home to Penpol Cove.
I was sitting at the back, my head resting against the grimy window. Outside, the gentle undulations of Perran golf course rolled by. The golf course where Ryan had shown me the stars the night of Amy’s party. The night when he had lain on the ground so close to me I could smell his skin and feel his breath.
It was all about Connor. Ryan was here as part of a mission and everything he did and everything he said was part of that mission. Including me. He had joined our school because it was Connor’s school. He had joined astronomy club because Connor went to astronomy club. He was friends with me because Connor was friends with me.
It hit me that every flirtation – every smile or accidental touch – was a calculated move on his part. And that when his guard was down – during the brief interludes in his mission – he chose to hang out at the arcade with Matt and flirt with Chloe Mason and her friends.
It made sense. Every boy at Perran School wanted to flirt with Chloe Mason and her friends. It was only natural that Ryan would too.
I felt like an idiot.
Ryan phoned me just as the bus left the bypass for the lane that ran into Penpol Cove.
‘What happened to you?’ he asked. ‘We were supposed to meet at the arcade. You said you would help me.’
‘You seemed to be doing a good job on your own.’
Which was true. Connor had cheered up immensely when he saw Ryan flirting with Chloe.
‘I let him beat me at pool like you suggested,’ Ryan said. ‘I think it’s working. He seems friendly this afternoon.’
‘That’s terrific.’
‘Is something wrong? Did something happen at Connor’s house?’
‘Nothing’s wrong. I’m just worried about my exam tomorrow.’
‘Do you want to meet up with me later on? I could test you.’
He sounded concerned. Friendly. Which was right. He was my friend. Nothing more.
‘No. I just want some time alone to study.’
‘OK,’ he said quietly. ‘Shall I drive you to school in the morning?’
‘No, I’ll take the bus.’
‘Oh. So, I’ll see you at school then?’ He sounded cautious, concerned that he might say the wrong thing. I was glad. I wanted him to suffer a little bit, to wonder if he’d misjudged his relationship with me.
I ended the call without saying goodbye.
Chapter 11
The air was still and filled with mist and drizzle. As I reached the cove, the thick vapour thinned for a moment revealing a woman throwing a stick for her dog and a boy perched on a rock, sketching. The boy turned towards me and smiled. Ryan.
I hadn’t seen him for days. He’d offered me a lift home after the French exam on Wednesday, but I’d made up a lame excuse about needing to meet Miranda in town. He’d called me several times on Thursday morning, but I let the calls go to voicemail. He didn’t try again. I’d heard from Connor that he’d spent Thursday afternoon at the arcade with Connor and Matt. Connor hadn’t mentioned Chloe by name, but the glee in his voice and talk of ‘some girls from school’ allowed me to fill in the blanks.
The mist thickened and he disappeared again. Sketching seemed a strange occupation for someone sent back from the future. Didn’t he have more important things to do?
For a few seconds I considered ignoring him and continuing on my run, but as usual, my desire to be near him outweighed my desire to forget him. Wishing that I was in the outfit I’d worn to Connor’s on Tuesday, instead of my ratty running clothes, I strolled across the pebbles and sand to Ryan’s rock.
‘Hi, Eden,’ he said, snapping his sketchbook shut and dropping it on the sand. ‘Are you OK?’
‘I’m great.’
‘You haven’t taken any of my calls. I was beginning to think you were avoiding me.’
‘I was avoiding you.’
Ryan gazed out towards the sea. ‘Oh.’
I sat down on a flat rock next to him. ‘What are you drawing?’
‘Nothing much. I like to sketch when I need time to think. It helps me relax.’
‘Are you going to Plymouth tomorrow?’
Ryan nodded. ‘I was planning to. Connor invited me. He said you wanted me to come. But now I’m not so sure.’
‘Will Chloe be coming?’
He looked at me, a mystified expression on his face. ‘Chloe Mason? To Plymouth?’
I just nodded, not trusting myself to speak.
‘Why would she be coming with us?’
‘The two of you seem pretty friendly now.’ I couldn’t keep the sulk out of my voice.
‘Is that why you ignored my calls? Are you jealous of Chloe?’
He sounded more surprised than amused.
‘Not jealous,’ I said. ‘It just helped me complete the puzzle.’
‘What puzzle?’
‘You.’
He raised an eyebrow.
‘Look, when I saw you and Chloe fooling around together at the arcade, all the pieces fell into place. You don’t travel through time to make friends with people. I get that. You’re here to complete your mission and your mission is to prevent Connor from discovering a planet.’
‘Yes,’ Ryan nodded.
‘So your friendship with me is a means to an end. I understand.’
‘No.’
He left the comment hanging in the air.
‘What is this anyway?’ I asked, snatching his sketch pad from the sand.
‘It’s just my art project,’ he said, reaching for the book. ‘It’s not interesting.’
I flipped to the first page. It was the sketch he’d made of me during our first art lesson together. I turned the page. Studies of leaves and trunks from our trip to the Eden Project. I continued to flick through the book. A sketch of me at the beach. Me lying back on the sand, my eyes closed. Another one of me, this time sitting on my bed, surrounded by books. My face in a half-smile. A full-length sketch of me standing by the school gate. Another sketch of me soaked through with rain. A close-up of my eyes, rain beading on my eyelashes, my mascara smudged below my eyes. A sketch of me sitting on Ryan’s bed, dressed in Cassie’s clothes.
‘Why have you drawn so many pictures of me?’
Ryan kicked the jagged rock in front of him. ‘I think about you a lot.’
‘Why? Am I significant?’
Ryan laughed. ‘To my mission? That’s what you mean, right?’
I nodded.
‘No. You’re not remotely significant. I didn’t even know you existed other than as the girl who broke Connor’s heart.’
‘So why do you have all these pictures?’
‘Isn’t it obvious?’
I shrugged. It wasn’t obvious at all. I knew that he liked me. And he’d been flirting with me for weeks. But he’d made it clear that he wasn’t looking for anything more.
‘I can’t allow myself to develop feelings for you,’ he said softly. ‘I leave for my own time on the twenty-third June.’
‘The day of the ball?’
‘That night. After the mission completes.’
I swallowed but a hard lump had lodged in my throat. ‘Are you any further with finding out what Connor’s plans are for that night?’
Ryan smiled. ‘I don’t suppose you’d consider going to the ball with him, would you? Then at least I would know where he is that night.’
I groaned. ‘I just don’t want him to get the wrong idea.’
Ryan punched my arm lightly. ‘It’s a small sacrifice, Eden. One night of wondering if Connor’s going to try and kiss you versus the death of the planet.’