We stopped singing and stood again in silence. The sun had set and the moon was rising. It was nearly full, obscured by the tops of the trees.
“Good bye, Merlyn, Boyo.” Alexander was watching the sky as well, “I miss you. Go to that big old moon and eat cheese. Lots of cheese. It can’t hurt you now. Don’t have to worry about cholesterol or your heart. Or your weight. Mangez des frommages, Mate! Maybe you’ll stumble upon Elvis there and you can show him how to sing.”
“Yeah,” Oliver grinned, “May your heaven be filled with cheese and stages and spotlights and people who can appreciate your particular brand of original vocal styling.”
“Go find Lance and wait for us, Merlyn,” I said softly, “When we all get together again we can sit around and laugh like we used to. We’ll go on day trips and haunt the halls of Bennington!”
“Please be well again,” Lucy, always the sensitive one, wiped her eyes, “Just be healthy and strong again, wherever you are.”
Burying Merlyn’s hat seemed to heal my husband and his brother to a certain extent. I would see Oliver from time to time go out to the spot and stand for a moment. He’d speak to the winds and I knew he was sending Merlyn a message.
It was still hard for them not knowing what had happened, but after a time the pain faded into sweet memories of a treasured friend. We never did find out how Merlyn crossed the veil, but I don’t suppose in the end it really mattered how he passed.
He did, as we all do.
In our time.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
I found as I grew older day by day two things. The first was that I had to wait patiently for the young to settle down and the second was that there was nothing I could do about it if they didn’t. I wanted to see all the children in the traditional situation…good marriages, good jobs, a couple of kids of their own, nice houses and all the trimmings of the perfect life. Carolena had managed all of those things and Nigel seemed to be stable and satisfied. The others were a different story.
Natalie had met a man in Paris the year she arrived. He was an art curator and she immediately felt an attraction. It was a rough start, as they both were horribly shy, but eventually they found their way to each other. They spent eight long years locked in an affair before she came home to Wales with her bags shipping right behind her.
She phoned us from the airport and asked if she could stay with Oliver and me at the wood.
“Well, of course, Nattie!”
“Oh, thank you! Could you ring my parents and have them come out tonight?” She asked.
“Why don’t you ring them, Muffin?”
“Oh, I have to get my rental car and I want to get there right away. Do you mind asking for me?”
“No, I’ll do it. You get here as fast and as safely as you can, OK?”
“I will! I’ll see you soon, Auntie Sil! Love you! Cheers!”
“Love you, too, Natalie! Cheers!”
I had a feeling right then that something was up, but I was so excited that Nattie would be back in Wales that I didn’t ask any questions. I knew she’d tell me the whole story later anyway.
We had a nice supper and afterward we sat in the front room so we could talk comfortably.
“So what are you going to do now that you’re back?” Oliver asked.
“Find a job!” She smiled, “As soon as I can! Don’t worry, I’m sure I’ll have my own place in a couple of weeks.”
“No rush,” We told her. “You know you’re always welcome.”
“Why don’t you stay with us until you find a job?” Lucy asked, “Welshpool is closer to civilization. You’ll save a mint in petrol.”
“Oh, I’ll find a job,” She replied, “I might have to move, but I’m hoping to stay close.”
“Well, it’s excellent to have you back, Nattie,” Alexander was usually the one to lay it on the table, “But I’m wondering what’s made you leave your life to come all the way back here.”
“I just wasn’t happy,” Her face went deep red. She looked at me like she needed to be rescued. “Things weren’t going to get better.”
I knew instinctively that Natalie was pregnant.
“Why would that be, Nattie Muffin?” Oliver’s eyes were sparkling.
“Well…Uncle Oliver and Auntie Sil…and Mum and Dad, I…” Her big blue eyes moved from one of us to the next, “I’ve made some major decisions concerning my life and my relationship. And, well,” She took a deep breath, “I’ve come home for a lot of reasons, but one mainly. Please no one shout. I’m going to have a baby. I’m sixteen weeks along.”
Alexander’s expression didn’t change. He just sat in his chair.
“Nattie!” Lucy exclaimed, “Why didn’t you tell us?”
“I didn’t plan it, it just happened. I wanted to make sure of what I was going to do before I told you. Like I said, I had some major decisions to make about my life.” I suddenly noticed that she was showing under her oversized jumper. We must have all been blind not to see it.
“And him?” Alexander had that thing that some Daddies have when it comes to their little girls. When I say that ‘thing’, I mean a deep, animalistic instinct to protect them and rip the throat out of anyone who has threatened or harmed their daughters. If Alexander had been a wolf the hair on the back of his neck would have been standing on end and his teeth would have been bared, “Why isn’t he here with you?”
Natalie went pale.
“Did he send you packing?” Oliver was doing his best to keep his voice under control. He had the same instinct as his brother. Even after all the years had passed since Natalie had lived under our roof, the line between her being our niece and our daughter was still sometimes blurred.
“Not exactly,” Natalie replied meekly.
Lucy moved to her side and slipped an arm around her. It was a protective measure that I was inclined to do myself.
“What do you mean not exactly?” Alexander demanded. He really didn’t need her to answer him. I could tell by the look of him he had already figured what she would say. He had that same expression on his face that Edmond had got just before he began screaming his head off, “Why isn’t he here with you sharing the good news?”
“She doesn’t need you to be angry,” I snapped, “She needs you to be her dad.”
Alexander took a deep breath, stretched his arms over his head and stuck his hands in his hair. He was making an obvious effort to remain calm. “I’m not angry with her. Why would I be angry with her?” He looked at me with such force that if I had not already been sitting I would have straight away. He stared at me before he turned back to his daughter, “Nattie, please just tell me what sent you home. I need to understand so I can help you.” He still sounded like he was ready to open a can with his teeth.
“He didn’t want to get married.”
“You don’t have to be married to have a baby,” Alexander was pressing for an answer.
“He didn’t want the baby, either. He tried to…” She couldn’t say it.
“Tried to what, Muffin?” Oliver prodded.
“He told me to have an abortion,” She said it quickly like she had filth in her mouth. “He even made me an appointment. And when I refused to go to it, he left me.”
Alexander’s face twisted. “Son of a fucking bitch,” I swear his lips did not move when he said it. “I knew it!”
“She did the right thing,” Lucy rubbed Natalie’s shoulder, “Coming home straight away where she’s got people who love her. She did the right thing, Alex.”
“She did.” I agreed. I could see the rage swelling in Alexander. Someone had wronged his baby daughter and he had every intention of avenging that, “Calm down, Alexander!” I knew that look, that hateful twist of the lips that he and Oliver both got on their faces just before they did something really rash and awful. “You’re not going to do your daughter one bit of good acting on your impulses.”