“Ollie,” I pulled my hand away from his, “You stay close! But don't you dare...touch… me!” I bore down.
“Push, Love!” Oliver told me, counting along with the doctor and the nurse, “One! Two! Three!” He was so excited. I was vaguely aware that he was smiling with his mouth wide open, “You're doing great, Silvia! You're doing so great!”
I wondered how the hell he knew if I was doing so great when with one final push and a collective cheer from the doctor, nurse and Oliver, out of me shot…
Absolutely the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.
“It’s a girl!” The doctor proclaimed, “Congratulations!”
Our baby screamed bloody murder.
“Hear that?” Oliver kissed me hard on the mouth, “Hear all that noise? That’s our girl! She’s ours, Sil! Listen to her! Isn’t she wonderful?”
“She is!” I don’t know why, but I was laughing. The nurse was pushing on my belly like she was trying to kill me to help me expel the placenta and I was laughing. “Listen to her bitch, Oliver! That’s the Dickinson in her right there!”
He let loose with a ridiculous cackle, “Aye, Love, that would be true! She sounds like Alexander on a bad day!”
After few moments they brought her over to us.
“Oliver, Oliver!” They put that little bundle in my arms, “Oliver, look at her! We’ve made a little monkey! Look, she’s just like a tiny ape!”
“Don’t say that, Mummy!” He bent closer at my side.
“No, honestly! She looks like a chimp! Look at her! She’s all funky! She looks like a teeny tiny baby orang-utan!”
“They’re all like that,” The nurse smiled gently.
“All of them come out looking like a deranged lemur?” Oliver asked genuinely. “Like some bizarre, demented infant baboon?”
The nurse’s eyes grew wide with horror.
Oliver and I, of course, laughed hysterically. We were having our first good joke at our new baby’s expense. And why not? We both knew new born babies were rarely attractive. Neither of us had a doubt she’d turn out fine. Besides, she was too young yet to take any offence.
“I don’t think she’s an ape at all, Love,” Oliver took her tiny foot in his hand and fingered her toes, “She’s just a wee little wet muffin is all! Give her time to dry out! She’s only got that look on her face cause of all that blooming hot sauce you made her ingest last night! You looked like a gorilla yourself this morning! I thought I woke up beside a grey back!”
“Ha!” I cried. Literally, I was crying. I was so happy and it all seemed so funny. Indigestion, various types of apes, new born babies, birth, life, marriage, the faith it took us to finally get there. It was all more than I could understand, but it was all real. As real as Oliver and me and our wee little wet muffin sitting there in the delivery room laughing it up together for the very first time.
Now that is a precious memory indeed.
When I was brought to a recovery room it was filled with flowers and cards and balloons. “How many people did you call?” I asked Oliver.
“Just Alexander, like you said. I told him to call whoever he thought of.”
I looked at a tag tied to a teddy bear, “Oh, my! This is from Sandy! He called Sandy! I miss her!”
“Of course he did, Love. She’s your best girlfriend. Are you ready for company? There are about a hundred people waiting to see you.”
“I suppose. I must look terrible.”
“Are you joking? You look absolutely amazing!” He gave me a wink, “I’ll be back.”
I sat there and looked around the room at all the gifts for a moment until people began to pour in.
“Silvia!” Ana was the first one in, Edmond stuck at her heels, “She’s absolutely perfect!”
“Did you see her?”
“Through the nursery window. The nurse said there are too many people here, but we don’t care!” She bent down and kissed me on the cheek, “My first granddaughter! Thank you!”
Edmond was speechless. He opened his mouth to speak, but couldn’t. He just stood there grinning and then he winked at me. He looked a lot like his sons when he did it. Finally he leaned over and kissed me right in the middle of my forehead, “We love you, Silvia!” He grinned as he pulled Oliver under his arm and kissed his forehead, too. “You did excellent, Son!”
Alexander and Melissa were next into the room, “Good job, Sil!” Alex had a sleeping Nigel on his shoulder. He stooped over and kissed me on the head, “She’s gorgeous!”
“Oh my!” I nearly screamed in shock and delight, “Lance Crosby, you old dog! What on Earth are you doing here?”
“Visiting you, of course!” He came over and gave me a huge hug. “You went and finally had that baby you’ve been carrying around since boarding school! You were pregnant nine years instead of nine months! Well done! I was in Caernarfon when Alexander rang me and I thought…well, hell…I ain’t had a day off in a while, so I drove on down.”
“You have not changed one wee bit! Except you’re a hair taller…let me see. Yes, you might be!”
“Oh, how I’ve missed you and your lies!”
“Sil,” Oliver pushed his way through and held out the phone. “You’ll want to take this.”
I took it from his hand, “Hello?”
“Silvia, it’s Lucy! Oh, I’ve missed the whole thing! Damn it! I wanted to be there!”
“She’s a girl! She looks like a chimpanzee!”
“Like a what?”
“She’s all squishy, she’s adorable. She looks like a squishy monkey!” I stuck my finger in my free ear, “Where are you?”
“I’m just crossing into England from home,” She was living in Scotland again. She'd gone back after she graduated from high school because she was worried about leaving Daddy alone. She'd struck out on her own since, but I knew she still kept close tabs on him, “I can’t believe I missed it! A girl! Brilliant! Dad is with me! We’ll be there as soon as we can! Don’t do anything else without me!”
“Oh, be careful, but hurry! I can’t wait to see you!”
“I’m losing bars now, Sil…I love you…”
The call dropped as I said, “I love you, too!”
“Lucy’s coming,” I told everyone excitedly, “And my dad, too!”
“I knew she’d make it back sooner or later,” Oliver tapped Alex on the shoulder, “Our sweet Lucy’s on her way!”
“Sweet Little Lucy Cotton!” Alexander grinned, “I haven’t seen her since she was in a training bra! Brilliant!”
Melissa shot him a look and he immediately straightened his face.
Lance had just hung up his mobile, “Merlyn sends his best. He’s in flipping Holland, if you can believe that. He’s in a meeting, but he’ll call you tonight personally.”
“What’s he doing in Holland?” I asked. Through my drugged and foggy mine, I couldn't imagine anybody needing to go to Holland for anything. It seemed like such a bizarre and strange place to be. I couldn't fathom how he could be there and not in England, even though he was Welsh and now lived in France. My head was a mess of physical exhaustion and narcotics.
“Some kind of business. He’s always travelling. He was in Finland last week.”
“Bollocks!” Alexander announced, “He’s gone to Holland get himself a pair of those wooden shoes! I’m so jealous!”
“Yeah!” Agreed Lance, “Me, too!”
By the time the room had cleared out a few hours later and the nurse had brought our baby back to us, I was too tired to hold her. Oliver, however, was not. He kicked off his shoes and told me to shove over. He crawled up into the bed with her in his arms. He set her between us. We both lay there and stared at our daughter, completely in awe.
“She’s perfect,” I whispered.
“Oh, yes. We made muffin magic with this one.” He couldn't take his eyes off of her.
“One day she’ll make muffin history.”
“Are we calling her after Madame Pennyweather?”
I felt the first ping of sadness I had in a very long time. Our headmistress had died late that autumn in hospital after suffering injuries she sustained in a car accident. We had spoken to her about a month before it happened on the phone and told her about the pregnancy. She had sounded so excited for us, “You are going to be wonderful parents! Children are the most beautiful blessing! You’ll have to bring the little one by and let me have a look!”