“Buroudei Cece to walk sand.”
Crap. That wasn’t right. Not even close. I raised my gaze, unable to help myself, watching as the shimmering parts of Buroudei’s eyes tightened up as he focused on me.
“Buroudei Cece to walk to retrieve sand.”
Oh, God. I really needed to work on my verb conjugation. And I wasn’t sure about the placement of the objects, direct or indirect. I was trying to tell him that I needed him to take me back out over the sand to the ship so that I could get some supplies. As terrible as it was, it seemed less and less likely every hour that any of my friends were left alive. But I was. I had survived. And I needed to do everything I could to ensure that survival. Buddying up with Buroudei and his people had been a big step towards that, but I needed more – more clothing and extra boots, more sunscreen, and whatever other useful stuff I could pull out of the cargo bay. Even the small amount of time I’d spent without my solar jacket today had left me sunburned, and Rika had had to smear some more of that radioactive milk on me to get things back to normal.
Buroudei hadn’t moved. I could feel the puffs of his breath against my mouth, and my lips parted involuntarily. Focus, Cece. I had to make him understand my request. I knew he wouldn’t let me just walk off alone, and I definitely wouldn’t survive such a field trip alone.
“Buroudei Cece to walk... sand... to retrieve...” I blew out a frustrated breath. Now I was just rearranging the words I’d already said. My vocabulary was failing me. Half the stuff I needed to say they probably didn’t even have a word for. I had a feeling that “space ship” wasn’t something that would translate.
“Come on, I’ll show you,” I said in English, scooting back further and standing. Buroudei’s tail twitched, and for a second it seemed like he was about to grab my ankle and yank me back down.
“Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere without you.” I held out my hand.
He stared at it, then looked up at me questioningly.
“Come on, stand up!” I waved my arms up and down, bending and straightening my legs dramatically so that he’d get the picture. He did, getting to his feet, raising himself to his full, impressive height. I ignored the drying of my throat, the quickening of my pulse, and reached for his hand, taking it in my own. “This is what I was trying to get you to do. Holding hands.” I gave his huge hand a squeeze, and watched in fascination as the specks of his eyes flew outward, his nostrils flaring.
“Not sure I like the look in your eye. Don’t distract me. Let’s go.” I tugged on his hand, leading him out of the tent.
Outside, the night was cool. I pulled Buroudei around the side of the tent, thoroughly enjoying the way he was following without question. I stopped, pointing out over the desert, hopefully somewhat in the direction of the ship. It was way too far away to be visible from here.
“Buroudei Cece to walk to retrieve.” With my free hand, I gestured violently out towards the horizon. Then I turned to look up at him. “Please, please understand me.”
Buroudei said nothing, his face impossible to read. We faced each other in the gloom, and he captured my other hand with his, holding them between us. Then he uttered a sentence, some of which I actually understood... “Something something go something something retrieve...”
I gasped.
“Are you saying you know what I’m asking. You’ll take me? You’ll take me back to the ship?” I pointed out towards the horizon again, and Buroudei’s tail twitched in acknowledgement. He repeated his sentence, and I was even more sure that time that he was agreeing to do what I’d asked.
I gave a whoop, almost as excited about our communication success as I was about actually going back to the ship, and I leaped forward, throwing my arms around his waist. I felt his tail thump the ground, hard, and his own arms wrapped around me, cradling me in a cage of steel. I pressed my forehead into his chest and sighed.
“Thank you.”
Buroudei gave a low growl, then before I knew it he’d yanked me up, carrying me close against his chest, back into his tent. I thought about protesting, and kicking and fighting to be let down, but slowly I realized that I just didn’t want to. I was flying high from the fact that we’d just talked to each other. Well, sort of. I was so excited by our new connection, and about the fact that he was going to help me. Tears burned in my eyes. It finally felt like I was making some kind of progress, that things were maybe starting to go alright after disaster after disaster. I looked up, almost dreamily, at Buroudei’s strong jaw, his fierce expression, as he carried me into the tent.
“What’s the next step up from ‘I’m so happy I could kiss you’? I’m so happy I could fuck you?” God, I felt crazy, and maybe this was crazy, but I knew in that moment that of Buroudei tried something again, I would go for it.
But he didn’t try anything. A soft “oof” of disappointment came out of my mouth involuntarily as Buroudei deposited me onto the collection of hides that was his bed. Then he stood, speaking softly, the only words I recognized being “dakrival hide” and “irkdu.” I frowned, gesturing at the straining behind his loincloth.
“You should really stay and take advantage of this, buddy. I don’t know if I’m going to feel this insane tomorrow.”
Buroudei looked pained, but he spoke again, more quickly this time, his words coming like gruff barks. He bent and brushed his fingertips over my forehead, down my jaw, then down the length of my braid, fingering the smooth tail of my hair. I moved up to my knees, clutching at his hand, pressing it against my neck.
The sound he made was strangled as he pulled away. Without another word, he turned, leaving the tent, the flap falling closed behind him with a finality that made me want to cry.
“Well, fine then. Whatever. Go do whatever alien business is so pressing,” I huffed. With an annoyed groan, I flopped down into the bed, pulling the hides around myself, burrowing down and nursing my pride. If Buroudei came back that night, I wasn’t aware of it. I fell asleep alone, and did not dream.
WHEN I WOKE THE NEXT morning, Rika was waiting for me once again. Similarly to yesterday, she remained glued to my side, and honestly, I was glad for the company. Though we couldn’t understand each other’s words, we were getting used to our unique language of gestures. I liked being around her, and that went for the other members of the tribe I’d gotten the chance to interact with, too. I kept my eyes peeled for Buroudei, unable to help myself. I caught flashes of him now and then, usually deep in conversation with an exceptionally tall warrior (exceptionally tall even by their standards), but like yesterday, he seemed extremely busy. I ignored the little niggle of pain I felt at not being able to spend time with him. Stupid. You should be focusing on more important things. More important things like when we’d be going back to the ship. I realized that Buroudei and I didn’t have a way to communicate when that was happening. He’d said he’d take me, but when? He might not have understood how much I needed to go get my human supplies.
He didn’t join us for the evening meal, and once again I ended up at his tent alone with a plate of food. Why do I feel like I got stood up? My feelings were ridiculous, but they were hurt all the same. When he finally did arrive, long after dark had fallen, I greeted him with a cold shrug, pointing to the plate. He looked at it, then slashed his tail, holding his hand out to me the way I had to him last night.