“You’ve done it to me,” I whispered, trying to hold it back until he could get it in me. “I’m going to come. I just can’t keep from coming now! Your finger was enough to drive me up the wall!”
“‘Hold on, Judy,” he said, reaching down to aim his cock up to the mouth of my ass, ‘I’ll have it in you in a minute and then we’ll both come! You’ve really got me worked up. I know I’ll shoot my balls off as soon as I feel your ass slip around me!”
“Hurry, get it in,” I moaned, biting my lip and trying to keep the come back for just another minute.
“I was so intent on getting him into my asshole that I forgot all about him being so big. That made me relax, I suppose, and it wasn’t any trouble at all getting him in. His tool went in just as easy, as if it were going in my cunt, and from then on it was just one great long stream of pleasure. Oh, I really had myself a time, laying there and letting that good feeling roll all over me when he started driving his cock home. Just as he said, he started shooting come as soon as the rim of my asshole popped around the head of his dick and that made him all the more anxious to get more of it inside me.
Lord, he just drew back and fucked my ass till I thought sure it was going to fall off! I was coming from the moment his prick started spreading the mouth of my ass, all the way down to the time he finally stopped squirting the come in me, and when he finally fell on me and lay still, I just felt totally drained.
“That first time with Jeff, I think, was about the only time I’ve ever done anything with a man and didn’t really hate myself at the very instant that it was all happening. Of course, after it was all over and he’d taken his cock out of my ass, then I started feeling terrible. But that first moment, when he was just getting it into me, I just felt as though I were doing something halfway nice. I don’t think I ever felt quite that way before or since.
“There’ amp; one thing about letting guys fuck you in the ass-every time I’ve tried it, the guy’s been so totally whipped by it that it’s’ just one time around and that’s it for them. Before I started making them flick me in the ass, back when I didn’t know anything but screwing the regular way, some of those fellows would go two or three times without ever taking their pricks out. You know, they’d fuck till they came the first time, then they'd lay there for a little while and — then they’d start in again and fuck some more. It sure isn’t that way when they’re ‘in my ass. Then it’s just one time’ and they’re done. I guess it’s got something to do with it being so much better back there. “
“Anyway, whatever the explanation is, Jeff was finished after that one time.
It’s just as well that he was because I’m not sure I could have taken him again. His prick is awfully big, long and thick, and I was fairly sore the next morning. It didn’t keep me from going to work, of course, but I’m just as glad there wasn’t any strenuous activity connected with the job! Jeff acted as though nothing had happened, except for a moment or two when we were alone.
Then he let me know that he thought it had been wonderful. That made me feel good because, by that time, I was really getting down inside myself and feeling awful about the way I’d behaved with him.
“We must have gone on for almost a week, acting perfectly normal toward each other. He’s in his mid-forties and I imagine he doesn’t want a woman quite as much as he once did. That’s nice for me. I don’t think I could stand it if he wanted me all the time. Most of the ‘time we are about like any executive and his secretary are supposed to be-businesslike and efficient. I’m sure, now that I know him better that he sensed the way I felt about it all and that he was deliberately holding himself back. He’s very sensitive, you know, and he can really adapt himself to another person’s moods.
“Sure enough,” it wasn’t very long until I could feel that old desire building up inside me again. Usually it starts as sort of a gnawing ache, very small, but then it just keeps on building until I’m dying to fuck, ready to do almost anything to get rid of that terrible want between my legs. I tried to hide it and to get by with finger fucking myself but that just wouldn’t work. Once I’d had the best, it was hard to settle for something a lot less significant! “Jeff must have seen the way I was being bothered because he was the one who got to me — I didn’t go to him. It happened after work one day, a day when I’d barely been able to get around, I was so hung up and so horny. When I went into his office to say good-bye for the day, he just looked at me in that peculiar way of his and I could feel my pussy starting to crawl.
“Close the door and come here,” he told me.
“I did and he started loving me. We didn’t have to worry about anyone interrupting us. No one ever goes into an executive’s office without knocking first. We were almost naked when I got this brainstorm of mine. I guess seeing Jeff’s cock-he was rock hard this time-made me think of it, or maybe it was something else. Anyway, I suggested that we go into his john and do our fucking there. He thought it was a nice idea and, as soon as he was stripped, in we went! “He sat on the stool and let me sit over him. I started to do it facing him but then I turned around and backed down onto him, first putting my cunt over his cock to get it slippery enough and then getting off and moving forward just enough that his prod would dip right into my asshole. It wasn’t until I’d already made the switch that I realized what I’d done-I was get ting flicked in exactly the same way- that. Mom was getting it from Dad that time that I saw them in their bathroom! When I realized that, I just about shit all over myself, it was so sexy, and then I reached down to grab hold of my pussy and, man, it was just ‘Come City’ from then on. I just had myself a perfectly wonderful time with that big cock of my boss up my ass!”
One might assume, from reading the second portion of Judy’s case history, that she had come to view her relations with men in a slightly different light and that her relations with Jeff were more nearly normal than the earlier affairs into which her guilt had driven her. We must caution the reader against drawing an overly hasty conclusion. Judy’s behavior still shows strong evidence of her fundamental distaste for the acts to which she was driven. This distaste is quite apparent in her account of their love play inside Jeff’s bathroom. She mentioned that at first she started to sit on him with her face toward him but that she turned and presented her back to him. This change is highly significant, as we can see from Albert Ellis’s conclusion that “a man, who feels so guilty about having intercourse with any woman that he is afraid to look her in the eye while having it, and consequently always enters her vagina from the rear, is a distinct sex neurotic or deviate-even though he is engaging in a sex act that under most circumstances would not in the least be berated or perverted.” (Ellis, Art and Science of Love, p. 227.) While Dr. Ellis’s words applied to males and vaginal intercourse, we can easily see that the basic contention would also hold when we consider the case of a woman addicted to anal sexual acts. Despite the slight change in her verbal attitudes, Judy’s essential loathing for anal sex continues, as does her need to be symbolically punished and degraded for her imagined offenses of long ago.