“Why did you stop yourself?”
I laughed. “Because saying that requires more bravery than I have.”
Logan’s hand slid from my shoulder up to my cheek, brushing away my tears and raindrops with the pad of his thumb. The move made my stomach tighten. It was a far more intimate movement than I’d expected or was used to from him. He took a small step closer to me, not close enough for our bodies to touch, but close enough that he could probably hear my heart beat. It was loud enough to drown out the sound of the cars, the rain, and the faint music from inside the pub.
“Let’s pretend you are brave,” he said. “What would you say?”
This was it. My chance. My moment. With his brown eyes gazing into mine, I took a deep breath and said, “If I was brave, I’d say that today was the best day ever. That I’ve waited since I was a dorky twelve-year-old to spend this much time with you. That I’ve thought about you almost every day since I’ve known you, and over the past year, you’re the first thing I think of when I wake up. I’d tell you that if we spend too much time not speaking, I doubt everything. I worry that you never really liked me, and you just… I don’t know… felt sorry for the girl who so obviously has a thing for you.” I paused to wipe away a fresh wave of tears. “I’d tell you that I’m scared we’ll go home tomorrow and I won’t see you for months, and I’ll let myself forget how amazing today has been. And I know it wasn’t perfect, but it kind of was because we’re both here together, and that’s something I’ve wanted for as long as I can remember. It all comes down to you, Logan. Every time.”
Logan closed his eyes, blowing out a slow breath, and a huge shuddering sigh pushed past my lips. I’d ruined it.
I pushed his hand away, but as it fell from my cheek, he used it to take a hold of my waist. “If you were brave,” he said, softly.
“Right. But I’m not. I’m stupid. And I’m sorry.”
I attempted to push him away again but Logan pulled me closer, and this time our bodies did touch. Our wet clothes seeped into each other, and I stared at him, confused. Why hadn’t he said those words I’d expected to hear every time I’d imagined telling him how I felt? “Marnie, you’re a really nice girl, and I love having you as a friend, but...” Those were the words I’d tried to run away from, because they had to be coming, didn’t they? Only in movies does the guy say what you truly want to hear.
“Marnie. Do you think I invited you out today because I have no other friends? Or that I suggested staying over because I couldn’t be bothered to drive home again? I wanted you to come with me, and I didn’t want to go home because if we had I wouldn’t have had the chance to spend the day with you.”
“What?” The word spluttered out because I hadn’t fully taken in what he’d said. It was hard to do with him so close. So focused on me.
He smiled and I couldn’t help it, I rested my hands on his damp hips. Part of the reason was to keep myself upright as his words began to trickle into my consciousness. The other part was that I wasn’t afraid anymore. It was okay to touch him now.
God, it felt good.
“I don’t stay away from you because I want to. I stay away from you because I don’t know if you really want me around.” He laughed softly. “Well, I didn’t know.”
My eyes narrowed slightly. “How could you have not known? And if you thought that, why did you invite me to the festival?”
He tilted his head to one side. “If you thought I felt sorry for you, why did you come?”
Fair point.
“So… are you? I mean…”
Nope. There weren’t enough words to explain what I wanted to say. My mouth had fully dried out, my tears were still falling, and my hair now clung to my cheeks as my clothes stuck to my body. Somehow, with Logan pressed against me, none of that mattered.
“I want to see you,” Logan said, his mouth hovering so close to mine his breath warmed my cheek. “All the time. I want to be with you.”
All I could do was nod. I wanted to tell him I wanted that too, but I’d said enough. More than enough. I lowered my eyelids, glancing at Logan’s lips as they moved slowly closer to mine. The corners of his mouth lifted slightly.
His lips brushed mine softly, feather light, and everything around us faded into the background. The only things left in the whole world were Logan and me, our mouths pressed together, our hands holding each other tightly, clinging to each other, to the moment. Every part of our bodies touched, and that fire re-ignited inside me again. The warmth of him seeped into my skin, into my bones, floating through my bloodstream and making my heart swell in my chest.
“How inappropriate would it be if I made a remark about getting you out of those wet clothes?” Logan murmured before kissing me again. His husky tone made my knees buckle and I held him tighter.
“Totally inappropriate,” I told him, running a hand through his thick, rain-sodden hair. “I like it.”
Present
Lydia’s grin perfectly mirrors mine as she reaches for my hands across the table and squeezes them, letting out a squeal of excitement.
“I can’t believe you finally told him.”
“I can’t believe it either. If I’d stopped to think it through, I would have said nothing, and I’d be sitting here with you complaining about how nothing will ever change, and how he can’t like me, and blah, blah, blah.”
“You took a chance. A really fucking big chance, and it paid off.”
I raise my eyebrows. “It sure did.”
Lydia slaps one of my hands in mock surprise at the cheeky look on my face. “So, did you do it?”
I laugh out loud and squeeze her hands again. “Well, we were wet from the rain and…”
“Not just the rain!”
“Lydia! I mean, you’re right but… we did have to change when we got back to the B&B anyway so…”
Her eyes widen and she squeals again. “You little hussy!”
Since I’d told her I wouldn’t give her details, I stop there, and let her bask in my happiness while I think over the things that transpired when we got to our room after our confessions. It may have taken us years to get there, but Logan was well worth waiting for. A perfect mix of sexy and sweet. Our first night together is one of the memories I want to keep safe. Maybe I’ll write them down so when I’m old and wrinkly, I can remind myself that I used to have fun, and that sometimes, taking a leap of faith can bring everything you’ve searched for.
About The Author
Kyra Lennon is a self-confessed book-a-holic, and has been since she first learned to read. When she's not reading, you'll usually find her hanging out in coffee shops with her trusty laptop and/or her friends, or girling it up at the nearest shopping mall.
Kyra grew up on the South Coast of England and refuses to move away from the seaside which provides massive inspiration for her novels. She published her first novel in July 2012, and her novella, If I Let You Go and Blindsided (Game On Book 2) soon followed.
To find out more about Kyra, check out her blog, website, follow her on Twitter, Facebook or Pinterest, or drop her an email at kyralennon@gmail.com
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Other Books by Kyra Lennon
The Game On Series
Game On
Blindsided
A Very Game On Christmas (super short novella, not a complete story)
Sidelined
The Razes Hell Series
Nobody Knows
Novellas
If I Let You Go
Mistletoe & Memories (written as Matilda Maxwell)