I saw Fang gathering up his gang. Maya said something that made him smile. He grinned back at her, and—right in the very same city that I myself was currently in—he pushed her hair away from her face. Just like he had done for me so many times.
I lost my breath, like I was getting punched in the stomach. It almost felt like my own personal D-day, where I was experiencing the end of “Fang and Max,” forever.
Suddenly, I needed to get away. I told Nudge and Angel that I’d be right back and gave them a lame, totally unconvincing smile. Then I ran down the sidewalk and launched myself into the air, ascending as fast as I could. I soared over the city and followed the Champs-Élysées, the main boulevard, to the Arc de Triomphe, the center of twelve streets that radiate away from it.
I circled the city several times, high enough not to be seen but low enough to take in some of the sights—the Eiffel Tower, of course, Notre Dame, and Sacré-Coeur, high on its hill. A light drizzle began to fall, adding to my sadness. Streetlights came on, and the city twinkled.
Finally, I alighted atop the Arc de Triomphe. No one was up on the observation deck; I had it all to myself. The day had grown chilly, and I was damp all over, strands of hair plastered to my face. From up here, nearly two hundred feet in the air, I could see most of the city. It was amazingly beautiful.
I sighed, resting my head against one of the big iron spikes at the perimeter of of the Arc’s deck.
I thought that I’d never see Fang again, but here we were, in Paris. At first I thought we’d always be together, but no. Then I thought we’d always be apart, but no again. I couldn’t count on anything; I couldn’t get used to either situation, because both kept changing. It was so frustrating! And so unfair!
I thought about what Angel had said, that I had to put my own feelings first when it came to Fang and Dylan. That would be easier if I actually knew what my feelings were. I wasn’t sure I wanted to spend more time getting wet and chilly up here trying—and probably failing—to figure them out.
I sighed again. I should go back, I thought. The flock will be wondering—
Then a hand touched my shoulder. I spun around, muscles tense. It took a second for me to process Dylan’s face, his unfolded wings, his look of concern.
“Don’t sneak up,” I said, feeling my heart pounding.
He gave a little smile. “At least I was able to. Ten points for me—I’m getting better.”
“Didn’t know we were keeping score,” I mumbled. I turned away from him and looked out over the city as the sky got darker. “Everyone okay?” I asked, not looking at him.
“Some of Angel’s feathers are singed, and her face is a little pink, but she’ll be fine. Everyone else is okay. We got a suite in the same hotel Fang is staying at. But on a different floor.”
“Great,” I said, trying not to sound sarcastic. Dylan was quiet then, standing near me. Finally, I broke the awkward silence. “Is that why you’re here? To let me know what hotel we’re at?”
He frowned slightly, and I saw tiny drops of water on his face from the mist. “Not exactly. I came after you because you looked upset. And I wanted to be with you.”
Again with the disarming honesty. The heart on the sleeve. I looked into his turquoise eyes and saw emotion there. Fang’s eyes were so dark I couldn’t see the pupils. And besides that, there was always layer upon layer of mystery, with Fang. Dylan’s eyes were clear and open and full of… well, I couldn’t let myself think it.
Dylan had come after me. Not Fang. But that wasn’t reason enough to let him… in.
“About that being-with-me thing,” I asked. “Why is that, really? Because if there’s a little bot gene inside of you that says ‘Me want Max’ all day long, I’m telling you right now, that’s just gross. I’m not interested.”
He watched me intently, and I wasn’t sure if I felt like prey or predator.
“See?” I jumped in. “Time’s up. You have no idea why you like me.”
Dylan smiled and reached out, gently taking my hand. “Well, for starters… you’re kind of beautiful.”
Okay, I wasn’t expecting that. Saving the world doesn’t give you a whole lot of time to look in the mirror. I’d done it maybe half a dozen times at most in the past year, most of the time to wipe blood off my face and check out injuries.
He couldn’t be serious.
“You have no idea how dumb that sounds, Dylan.” I snorted and pulled my hand away. “I guess you’re too adolescent to understand that girls want you to like them for who they are, not how they look.”
Dylan shrugged. “I said ‘for starters.’ You didn’t let me finish.”
“So… be my guest.” I tapped my fingers playfully on the railing as his eyes bored more deeply into mine.
“Waiting…” I said in a singsongy, now slightly jittery voice. He was moving toward me slowly, as if giving me a chance to protest. I didn’t.
“Can we… talk about that later?” he asked. “I’m kind of… distracted right now.”
But he couldn’t have been more focused.
I didn’t move—my back was against the safety bars. He touched my cold cheek with one hand, then pushed my damp hair away from my face. He ran his fingers down my tangly mop as if it were a strand of pearls.
When he looked back into my eyes, his expression gave me a little jolt.
“Um…” I said.
Then he stepped even closer and tilted his head slightly to one side, his eyes still locked on mine. I was frozen in place as his mouth touched mine and he kissed me. He was strong and warm and solid, and he gathered me to him, an arm around my waist. I didn’t remember making a decision, but my arms found their way around his neck as he kissed me harder, holding me close in the mist.
And for a long time, it was just the two of us, silhouetted against the Paris skyline, the night deepening around us.
And it felt… right.
And kind of beautiful.
63
I AM NOT Miss Savvy about romantic relationships. The only one I’ve ever really had was with Fang, and, I admit, it was kind of strange to fall in love with someone I had grown up with. So I was quietly freaked out about kissing Dylan. Eventually, it dawned on us that we were really hungry, so we’d flown back to the hotel together, only to find everyone walking down the street to a little crepe place on the corner.
I’d felt Fang’s sharp gaze studying our faces as we sat down, Dylan’s leg warm against mine, and I started to feel self-conscious. Then I remembered what Angel had said: he could stay and weigh in, or leave and keep his mouth shut. That made me sit up straighter, and I smiled at Angel as I asked her to pass the bread. I didn’t know what all this meant, didn’t know where it was going, but for the time being, at least I wasn’t running away screaming. Which was progress.
After dinner (which was fabulous—ham and cheese and potato crepe), we all walked back to the hotel together. Angel and I fell behind and were talking quietly while the others went ahead. I was half paying attention to what she was saying and half reliving kissing Dylan.
And I’m sure you already realize what I didn’t remember till it was too late: Angel can read minds. And she isn’t too particular about who’s mind it is or when she reads it.
She took my hand. I looked down at her and saw that she had grown three inches, like, in the past couple months. “I’m sorry this is so hard, Max,” she said. “I know it’s all confusing.
“And I know how much you love Fang,” she said, surprising me. “But that just doesn’t seem possible anymore, you know?”