Where was the owl?
“If I brought him here and never took him back? We could live here.”
The owl had its back to the man.
Treadway stayed out until dark. He navigated home the way he always did, by knowing the contours of the land, by the moon, by parts of Orion and the Dog Star, which appeared in certain clearings. He came home to a note on the table and two plates of dried-up salt fish and congealed drawn butter. The stove had gone out. The phone rang and it was Thomasina.
“I’ve been trying to get you.”
“Why?”
“We’re in Goose Bay. Wayne had to have pressure taken off his belly. There was a lot of built-up fluid. You weren’t home. But Treadway, I’m asking you to do something for me.”
“What’s that, Thomasina Baikie?”
“Tell Victoria Huskins I called you from the hospital and you gave me permission to bring Wayne in. She’ll have my head on a plate if you don’t.”
There are degrees of trust and mistrust. Treadway mistrusted a woman like Victoria Huskins much more than he mistrusted Thomasina. When you have known someone thirty years, even if you have different personalities and even if you would approach the same problem differently, at least you know where you both came from. There is a bedrock of respect. Victoria Huskins was not, in Treadway’s mind, basic. Thomasina was. There was a basic person in there to whom you could talk, in a worst-case scenario. Victoria Huskins, in a worst-case scenario, Treadway thought, would not be basic. Her concerns would be that the correct papers be filled out, that her skirt have its back seam running directly up the middle, that any stranger or pilgrim who sat in her pew be re-educated right away. He had seen this.
“What kind of built-up fluid?”
“Blood.”
“Blood?”
“A lot of it, Treadway.”
“Is he injured?”
“It’s normal blood that flows out of a girl’s body when she reaches Wayne’s age. Menstrual blood trapped inside. And there is another thing, but I would have to tell you in person.”
“Should Jacinta…?” Treadway was not happy talking about menstrual blood. He did not know what to do. “She’s out. With Eliza and Joan. Where’s Wayne now?”
“He’ll be home in the morning. I’ve been trying to call you. Visiting hours are over in five minutes. If you talk to the head nurse they will give me permission to stay here with Wayne. I can stay for the night, or you and Jacinta can come. He’s asleep. If you talk to them now they’ll let me stay. Otherwise I have to leave.”
“I’ll be there.” He was not going to let anyone but himself or his wife stay by Wayne’s bed overnight in the hospital. He did not phone Jacinta. He put his woods coat back on, though it was damp, and he got in his truck and went to get his wife.
One difference between Eliza Goudie and Joan Martin was that when they were drinking with the women for the night, Eliza bought piña coladas from the liquor store and Joan brought over a bottle of her husband’s single malt Scotch. Eliza liked fizzing concoctions with pineapple and coconut flavouring and palm trees on the bottle, while Joan just liked to get quietly wrecked. Joan heaved herself onto the loveseat and Eliza sat in the big old rocking chair near the television, which was a big television because her husband had liked to sit watching it while she was out at all hours with the geography teacher, or with the lovers she had had before that. He had liked to watch Bob Barker on The Price Is Right, and after that, Jeopardy.
“He hums,” Eliza told Joan and Jacinta, “the theme from Jeopardy while we’re making love. Dum da da diddle dum da daaaaa, dum, dadumda dee dee diddle diddle… talk about unconscious. Could you have an orgasm with that going on? Could you? Because I can. And do you know why? Because I imagine he’s gone to sleep on his surfboard and really I’m in bed with Dudley Moore and my hair is all in cornrows like, you know, what’s her name?”
“I dunno,” Joan drank from the bottle. “This is on the peaty side of single malts. It was made in a cave. Some tiny cave in the north of Scotland, more remote than we are here. My husband picked it out because of the cave. My husband, the caveman.”
Jacinta had a bottle of Mateus that had been in the freezer for half an hour. She liked how frost steamed around the gold label, the fffftz and the puff of fruity scent. If she was going to drink, Jacinta wanted fizz. She wanted Spain. She wanted celebration and the word rosé.
Joan had made the sour cream and onion soup mix dip from the new Kraft commercial, and had brought a huge bag of rippled chips. Eliza had brought a plate of Cheez Whiz on celery sticks, and Jacinta had made marshmallow cookies with melted chocolate chips and Parawax.
“What’s her name? Dolores?” Jacinta asked. “It’s not Dolores, is it?”
Joan said, “I can’t remember her name in the movie, but her real name’s Bo Derek.”
“I don’t see how anyone can go to see movies in that ratty old cinema in Goose Bay,” Jacinta said. “Half the time they put the last reel on first or the projector breaks down altogether.”
Eliza said, “You know what really pisses me off about that movie?”
“Um,” said Joan, “could it be the fact that the only thing that happens in it is they play Ravel’s Bolero ninety-nine times and the women have no personality, just a number given to them by men like prize pigs at a county fair?” She took a swig of her Oban.
Jacinta said, “I want to ask you something.” The third glass of wine was for her the magic glass. At a Christmas party or an evening out with other families, she had two glasses. The third glass was the glass that floated her above. She did not have that glass as a rule, but this was not a night when the rule applied. “I know you’re having sex with your husband again,” she said to Eliza. “I know all about the leopard-skin boots and the Valium. What I want to know is you, Joan, you’re not on Valium? You’re not on anything that artificially enhances your sex drive?”
“My what?”
“I just want to know if anyone besides me here looks at an erect penis as a ludicrous object all of a sudden.”
Joan looked at Jacinta as if she were finally seeing the light.
“I mean, I have no problem with Treadway. As you know, he is a good man.”
“Yeah, he’s that,” Joan said.
“He’s a really good man. I figure if I can’t get along with him, I might as well go crawl off by myself into a little hole somewhere.”
“But you don’t want to have sex with him.”
“It’s menopause, right? I mean, one month I was ‘Hello Mister Penis, how are you tonight, happy to see you in all your cheery Mister Penisness. Good job, Mister Penis, yes, I like you.’ Then the next month, ‘Whoa there, bucko, you most ludicrous of creatures, what in the name of God do you think you’re trying to do? Go near my vagina? Get in it? Why would you want to do that? Oh, most ridiculous idea.’ If it wouldn’t have mortified Treadway I’d have burst out laughing.”
“Valium will fix all that.”
Joan settled into the cushion with the needlepoint windmill on it. “I didn’t need menopause. One night when I was twenty I looked at Harold and his cock was a nose, his nipples were eyes, and his little bush of hair was a woolly moustache.”
Eliza spit pina colada on the floor. Harold walked around Croydon Harbour a neat little man. If you had to explain to an alien what a human man was like, if you wanted the straightest, neatest definition, you might pick Harold Martin as your example.