“It was the proper thing to do. Gross indecency. There are laws about that.”
“Against people exposing themselves? Yes, indeed.”
“He could be a sex maniac.”
“That’s an expression I haven’t heard for years.”
“A pervert, then. A danger to the public.”
“A 999 call?”
“How else am I supposed to report it? You know very well that calling the local police station is no help at all in an emergency. This was going on while I was watching. In a short time he’d be away.”
Diamond controlled his contempt. This was the justification that put impossible strains on the emergency service. People didn’t trust the first line of help, be it police or general medical practice, to react effectively to their small crises. In a society where so much of life is controlled by the touch of a button they felt entitled to instant action. And then they complained when the response times got longer and longer.
“Where exactly was he when you first spotted him?”
“Down by the pool. It was flagrant nudity.”
“Was he alone at the time?”
“He appeared to be. That doesn’t excuse it.”
“No one’s excusing it, Mr. Bellerby. What happened next?”
“He left the lido and started up the footpath. That was when I called 999.”
“And then?”
“I continued to observe him so that when the police arrived I could say exactly where he was.”
“Sensible.” This buffoon had to be humoured to tell his story in full.
“I followed his progress all the way up the footpath towards Hampton Row.”
“Still without his kit on?”
He cleared his throat. “By then he’d put on some sort of tracksuit.”
This was getting more and more farcical. “He’d dressed before leaving the lido?”
“Yes. I kept him in my sights as long as possible.”
“And when he reached Hampton Row you dashed into the front room to see where he went. Is that right?”
“I wouldn’t say ‘dashed.’ I was perfectly calm.”
“Put it this way: you moved directly there. Did he come into view?”
“No. Unfortunately there’s a bend in the road. I can’t see Hampton Row from here. That’s where the footpath comes out. I expected he would turn this way, but it seems he didn’t. I can only imagine he lives in one of the terraced houses along there.”
Ingeborg, who had listened with admirable self-control, said, “Or he could have turned up Rockliffe Avenue.”
“I think not. I can see that turn from here. Well, from my front gate.”
“So you went outside?” Diamond said.
“To meet the police-as I expected. I told them to come here.”
“But the incident wasn’t here. It was down at the lido.”
“Quite true. But if they were going to make an arrest, they’d have to do it up here. He was already climbing the hill when I made the call.”
There was a plodding logic in this, but Diamond had long since lost any sympathy he may have had. Somehow, he had to rein himself in, because this absurd little man could still have vital information. “Think carefully, Mr. Bellerby. What happened next?”
“There was a fearful bang-”
“Before that,” Diamond cut him short. “We’re here about the events leading up to the crash. Did you hear the approach of the police car? Were they using their siren?”
“I believe not. I would remember, wouldn’t I?”
A question impossible for Diamond to answer. “I’ll take that as no. How about their beacon lights?”
“Yes, I saw them flashing, I’m certain. The thought went through my head that this must be the police car answering my call, and then there was the screech of brakes and that almighty bang and the lights weren’t flashing any longer.”
“You heard the crash but didn’t actually see it?”
He nodded. “I was too far off.”
“By your front gate?”
“I told you.”
“How long for?”
“I don’t know. I wasn’t timing myself.”
“Ten minutes?”
“About that.”
“This is important,” Diamond said. “I know the crash is strongest in your memory but during the ten-minute wait did anyone else come by?”
Bellerby frowned and then fingered the moustache as if it might aid his thought process. “Yes, there was someone, an elderly man on a tricycle.”
“Before the crash? This could be helpful. Which way did he come?”
“From the Hampton Row direction. It was still quite dark but I made sure I got a sight of him in case he was the naked man. I’m certain he wasn’t. He was definitely older and dressed differently as well, in a jacket and deerstalker hat. Heaven only knows where he’d been or where he was going.”
Finally something useful.
Diamond pressed for more details. “Was he travelling fast?”
“Not at all. The tricycle must have had some kind of motor, because he wasn’t pedalling, but you could have kept up at a quick walk. His steering wasn’t the best, either. He was wandering off course as if he wasn’t used to riding the thing.”
“Did he have lights?”
“I’m sure he did, front and back, the sort that wink intermittently.”
“Did he see you as he went by?”
“He was too busy trying to stay in control. I don’t think he noticed me at all.”
“But you definitely saw him before the car crash? How long before?”
“Not long.”
“I need a more precise answer than that.”
“Three or four minutes, at least. I assume he got through before it happened.”
“You’re wrong about that,” Diamond said. “An elderly man was found a short time ago, unconscious.”
“Oh my word. Nobody said.”
“He and his tricycle were thrown high up on to the embankment.”
“Shocking.”
“You say you didn’t recognise him?”
“It was almost dark and I didn’t get a proper look at his face, but I can’t recollect anyone from round here riding a tricycle. Poor fellow. Will he recover?”
A fatuous question. Diamond glanced at his colleagues. “We’ve heard enough for now, I think.”
On the drive back to Keynsham, where Bath CID was now inconveniently housed, Halliwell spoke for all of them. “What a toerag. He doesn’t get it, does he? Because he made that stupid bloody call, Aaron Green was killed and two others are in intensive care.”
“People like him have no idea of consequences,” Ingeborg said. “They’re so wrapped up in themselves they don’t think of the risks each time there’s a call-out.”
“I can’t make out why he got so uptight about a nude bather,” Halliwell said. “It’s obvious he’s some kind of perv himself with his telescope and binoculars. Studying wildlife, for Christ’s sake.”
“There’s more to it,” Diamond said. “He has an agenda. He’d like to stop the lido project. Did you see the glint in his eyes when I talked about parties and loud music? Any mud he can throw their way, he will.”
“Is that all it was about?”
“It’s no help to him if he’s the only one who sees the naked flesh. He wants maximum publicity, so he calls 999.”
“After the guy has got dressed and left the place. Pointless.”
“No,” Diamond said. “He had a point. He wanted our lot involved, to get it on record. He could write to the papers or go on local radio and say the lido is being used for nude bathing and the police were called and unless something is done about it, they’ll soon be having sex parties and orgies.”
“How do I join?” Halliwell said.
Ingeborg rolled her eyes.
“His coffee was rubbish, too,” Diamond said. “Let’s stop off at the Verona.”
In Keynsham police centre, Georgina, the ACC, had told everyone she wished to speak to Diamond the instant he returned. He took a relaxed view and stretched the instant to almost an hour. It had been a long morning.
“This mysterious man on a tricycle,” she said when he finally went upstairs and reported. “Who is he?”