She wanted him so bad in that moment, but not like this. She wanted him as hers. She wanted him to be her own. No longer could she play the game of sharing him with another. If he was to have her and all of her, she needed the same. She needed him to only belong to her.
“I’m sorry,” he said pulling back softly as he noticed her desire wane. “I’m sorry again and again. I couldn’t control myself.” His hand came up softly to her face and cupped her cheek. “You’re so beautiful.”
“I’m sorry, too. We shouldn’t be in this position again. I want us to be…us,” she finally admitted to him. “I want you to be mine.”
He nodded. “I know. I know what you mean.”
“And I’m okay holding off until you are mine, Jack.” He nodded again. “I need to know if that is a reality for us one day or if I’m wasting my time on you.”
His thumb caressed her cheek affectionately as the time stretched between them. “I don’t think you’re wasting your time. When I’m with you, I know I’m not wasting my time.”
Lexi nodded letting a smile touch the edges of her mouth. “Oh, Jack,” she sighed happily planting another kiss on his mouth. She hadn’t felt this euphoric in nearly two years. Something about him always brought out the best feelings in her. And now it looked like things were actually going to work out for them, and they were going to do it the right way.
They let the night recede into morning as they stayed up together sharing stories and remembering what it was like to be in love. The easy flirtatiousness that they had always shared was dampened by the impending emotions that were sure to come forth once they got everything worked out. Instead, they enjoyed each other’s company along with the rest of the bottle of wine until the candles died out, and they both fell asleep.
CHAPTER 16
NOVEMBER ONE AND A HALF YEARS EARLIER
“Are you sure we have to have this sleepover at your place?” Chyna asked eyeing the dorm hallway reproachfully. “You do know I own a penthouse overlooking Central Park, right?”
Lexi rolled her eyes dramatically. “Yes, I’ve been there before. It’s beautiful, but you can’t get the college experience in a penthouse.”
“I take it back,” she said looking at a particularly large brown stain on one wall, “I don’t want to know what it’s like to be in college. That’s why I didn’t go. I’ve been dating college guys since I was fifteen. If I’ve managed to avoid a dorm room for five years, then I’m not meant to be in one. Really, I’m peachy keen, chica.”
“You’re not getting out of this that easy,” Lexi growled snatching a hold of one of Chyna’s delicate wrists and yanking her further down the hallway. “And anyway, how did you get away with that?”
“With what?” she asked innocently.
“Dating college guys.”
“My penthouse was my sweet sixteen present. Happy Birthday princess! We’re getting divorced. Move out,” she said giggling sardonically. “It really was the best thing they could do for me since I didn’t have access to my trust and couldn’t purchase it myself.”
Lexi had gotten used to this loathing hateful attitude Chyna displayed towards her parents. It was pretty common place. Lexi tried not to broach the subject too often since she had no experience in what Chyna was going through. Her parents, after all, were still happily married after nearly thirty years together. It truly saddened Lexi that Chyna’s perception of relationships was so warped. The fact that her parents hadn’t completely jaded her towards all human interaction was a miracle in and of itself. “Now that you have access, why don’t you get rid of it?” she asked. Though, she couldn’t blame her for holding onto the beautiful apartment.
“I’ve replaced nearly everything inside from knocking out walls and replacing the floorboards. It’s not like it’s the same place anymore. Did I mention it overlooks Central Park?”
Lexi resisted the urge to mention that the penthouse was also the last gift Chyna had ever received jointly from her parents. She highly suspected that was the real reason for never selling the place.
Lexi could easily admit that an NYU dorm room was nothing compared to Chyna’s apartment, but she was far from ashamed of the place.
She shared a common area with three other girls, all who had been admitted into the law school that fall. The space was cluttered with knick-knacks from each other’s previous residences. A mismatching couch and loveseat were crushed together in front of the TV. The kitchen didn’t even have a stove because it was a safety hazard. This explained why their tiny freezer was always overstocked with microwavable dinners. Lexi had one of the rooms, if you could call them that. She hadn’t lived in a lofted bed since her freshman year of college. But if she hadn’t put her bed nearly touching the ceiling, nothing else would have fit in the space. A tiny desk, rolling chair, and miniature refrigerator were crammed under the bed. The rest of the furniture was built into the room. Somehow she wasn’t embarrassed to bring her rich friend back to her place even if her room was as big as the girl’s closet. She was in New York City at a top five law school. This was how people were supposed to live or at least that’s what she kept telling herself.
“Here we are,” Lexi said hearing the lock click and pushing the door open. Chyna inspected the shared living space while Lexi produced another key and unlocked her bedroom.
“It’s so…quaint,” Chyna announced cocking her head to the side thoughtfully. Her eyes scanned the room, purposely avoiding the ugly carpeted floors, before landing back on Lexi.
“You haven’t seen anything yet.” Chyna turned towards Lexi following her into the bedroom.
“Wow. You didn’t prepare me for this,” Chyna mumbled.
“I didn’t think it would be possible to prepare you.”
“You’re probably right,” she agreed in awe. Swiveling in place, Chyna observed the size of the room before saying, “You do realize my closet is bigger than this room.”
“Maybe next year I’ll move into your closet,” Lexi quipped only half-joking.
“Then where would my clothes go?” Chyna asked, her hands placed lightly on her hips.
“I’ll work around it.”
“Fine. Just don’t touch the cashmere,” she said giggling.
Chyna placed her hobo handbag in the empty desk chair and sauntered towards the bay windows, which Lexi repeatedly claimed were the only redeeming feature about her bedroom. Lexi watched her for a few minutes recognizing the wheels turning in her mind. Something was going on up there, and Lexi had a feeling it wasn’t going to be good.
Whirling on her kitten heels, Chyna faced Lexi with a beautiful smile tacked onto her face. “Can I redo your room? I know this amazing designer. I’m pretty sure he would be able to fix this um…problem.”
Lexi rolled her eyes dramatically. “My room is fine the way it is.”
“Of course, dear,” she said linking their arms and nuzzling close to her friend, “but I could make it gorgeous. You would absolutely love Frederick too. He’s a mastermind. He did the renovations in my guest bedroom recently and they’re stunning…”
“Chyna…”
“He could really do a number on this place,” she continued oblivious to Lexi calling her name.
“Chyna, chill out,” she said shaking her out of her reverie. “How about we just have a good time?” Lexi suggested.
“Oh, but Alexa, I’m telling you. The man is a decorating genius.”
“I’m sure he is, sweetie, but this is a college dorm room. It’s supposed to look like this.”
“I’ll get to you eventually,” she warned poking her playfully in the ribs.
“Yeah, yeah,” she said waving her off.
“So…” Chyna drawled, “what do girls do at slumber parties?”