God, I wanted to be footloose and fancy-free just one time. I just wanted to see how the other half lived once. I wanted to be reminded that I was a desirable woman and that the loneliness I had inside was only temporary. So without thinking, I arched my back, letting Dylan know that I was fully ready to give in to whatever his fingers had in store and maybe a little bit more. He pulled my panties down to my ankles and slid to his knees. A few seconds later I was pleasantly surprised when his warm, wet tongue began to lick the inside of my thigh, making me gush with moisture. I swear to God, he sent shivers down my spine when he touched the spot that I thought only I knew. I gently took hold of his head so he wouldn’t get away and deprive me of the pleasure he was giving. A few minutes later I felt an eruption between my legs that was more powerful than the fireworks on the Fourth of July. Maybe it was because I had just gone through such a long dry spell, or maybe it was his skills, but I swear I was experiencing one of the greatest orgasms of my life, and I was powerless to do anything other than enjoy it. When I finally regained my composure, Dylan was above my face, resting his weight on those gorgeous, muscular arms. He kissed me and I pulled him against my body, still enjoying the lingering warmth from my orgasm.
“You like that?” he smiled.
I nodded but was too spent to speak. I loved that feeling that comes after a powerful orgasm, when every inch of your body feels like you just had a massage, and you’re so relaxed you don’t want to move a muscle. You just want to sleep. And it would’ve been easy to lie there and do just that with Dylan on top of me. Unfortunately, I was forced to come to my senses when I heard the jingling of his belt buckle. That’s when I realized the mess I’d gotten myself into. How could I have been so stupid? Sure, Dylan was a nice guy, but did I really believe he was gonna give me that kind of pleasure without expecting some in return? Hell, no. Just like any man, he was ready to get his now. And I guess I couldn’t blame him for it, but I sure as hell wasn’t down with it Especially after Derrick marched back to the forefront of my thoughts.
“Stop. I can’t do this,” I practically screamed as I struggled to get out from underneath him.
“Don’t worry. I’ve got a condom right here.” He was trying to show me the condom and soothe me with his tone, but I wasn’t having it.
“I don’t care. Stop!” I tried to push him off me but he was too heavy or didn’t wanna be moved. I wasn’t sure which one. All I knew was, his frown was making me nervous. Real nervous.
“What’s wrong?”
“Get the fuck off me! Don’t you understand? No means no!”
He still didn’t budge. At that point the only thing going through my mind was that I was about to become a rape victim, and I had no one to blame but myself. Jesus, how stupid could I be? I’d been preaching to Becky for years about leading men on, and there I was doing the same damn thing. The only thing left for me to do was beg.
“Dylan, please. Please get up. I don’t want to do this,” I cried.
“What’s the problem?” He sighed loudly and lifted himself off of me. I ran to the other side of the room as quickly as I could. “Did I do something wrong?”
Can you believe he put an innocent look on his face as he asked that question? It took a few seconds for me to finally gain my composure, but when I did I lit into him.
“You damn right you did something wrong, you fucking phony! A few hours ago in the club you were lovesick over your ex-girlfriend. But you were really just scheming to get some ass, weren’t you? And when I wasn’t givin’ it up fast enough you figured you’d just take it, huh?”
“Take it?” His face was full of astonishment and anger. “You trying to say I took advantage of you? You gotta be kidding! If anyone got taken advantage of, it was me. ‘Cause I sure as hell didn’t hear you complaining when my face was between your legs and you was begging me not to stop. Guess it’s all good as long as you’re gettin’ yours, huh?”
He picked up my panties and threw them at me. I felt like a fool when they hit me in the face. Especially when I thought about how easily I’d let him take them off.
“You know what, Jasmine? You’re a real dick-tease.”
Don’t get me wrong. Some small part of me knew I was being unfair to Dylan. I wasn’t some young, naive church girl. I knew you couldn’t get naked with a man and expect him to put his dick away as soon as you ordered him to. Hell, guys just can’t turn it on and off like that. And the more I thought about it, he never really tried to put it in; he just kept staring at me. It probably just took some time for his big head to start thinking for his little head. Something told me this guy was genuinely confused by my actions.
Problem was, I was so full of guilt about what I’d done, and that guilt was stronger than any sense of fairness I might have toward him. Even if it was wrong, I wanted to make it all his fault. If I took part of the responsibility, then I had to admit to myself that I wasn’t the faithful girlfriend I’d been claiming to be for so long. I was no better than Becky now, and who the hell would want to admit to that?
“Everything all right out here? Rebecca thought she heard… Oops!” Joe walked into the living room and let his eyes wander up and down my half-naked body. He didn’t even try to hide his smile. Why should he? There I was standing there like an idiot, balancing on one foot with the other halfway into my panties.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt,” he chuckled.
“You’re not interrupting anything,” I snapped, trying to sound in control. And that was no small task as I tried to pull up my panties and close my shirt all at the same time. “Tell Becky I’m ready to leave.”
“You ain’t gotta leave. Y’all can spend the night if you wanna. I got an extra bedroom.” Joe winked at Dylan, which pissed me off even more.
“Don’t wink at him like I’m some fucking ho. I ain’t no ho, and he ain’t get none. Did you?” I turned toward Dylan, but before he could answer, Joe cut in.
“Hold up. Ain’t nobody call you a ho. I was just asking if you wanted to spend the night. Damn, what’s with the stink attitude?”
“Ask your friend.” I pointed at Dylan, who glared at me evilly. “Look, just forget it. Tell Becky it’s time to go.”
“I don’t believe this shit,” Joe mumbled under his breath. He was obviously pissed off, but I didn’t care. He was just another horny asshole lookin’ to get laid, and Becky sure fit that bill. The worst part was, as far as they were concerned, so did I.
“So you gonna blame this whole thing on me, huh?” Dylan finally spoke.
“I’m not blaming this on anyone. All I know is that it was a mistake to come here. I just wanna go home.”
“Yeah, well, so do I.”
Becky walked into the room with her dress all crooked and buttoned wrong.
“Why we gotta leave?” Becky shouted. Her hair was sticking out every which way. “Why don’t we just go to work from here?”
“’Cause my work clothes are at your house and I’m ready to leave now. That’s why.” I sucked my teeth.
“Damn, Jasmine, you could fuck up a wet dream, you know that? Why don’t you lighten the fuck up for once?” She headed for the door, followed by an angry Joe. I was about to follow them to the car when Dylan put his hand on my shoulder. I wasn’t sure what he was up to, so I turned to face him with my fist clenched.
“What do you want?” I snapped.
He shook his head with a frown, then spoke very frankly. “You were wrong for the way you treated me. And I want you to know I wasn’t trying to take advantage of you. I was feeling you, Jasmine. I was really feeling you and I thought you were feeling me. Now I mighta got caught up in the moment, but I would never rape any woman.”