“Why? Why the fuck would you do this to me?”
Stephanie smiled out at me from that picture as if to say, I’ll do what ever I want. You’re in love with me, remember!
Maybe it was the alcohol or maybe it was just my pent-up anger, but I snatched that portrait from the wall and threw it to the ground It shattered into a hundred pieces and I was about to stomp on what was left of it when I heard a car pull into the driveway. A few seconds later I heard Stephanie’s voice coming form the front door.
“Travis! You home, baby? Travis!”
“I’m in the living room,” I grumbled. It took everything I had not to explode on her like I did the portrait when she walked in the room.
“Hey, baby. I didn’t…” Her eyes took in the broken glass all over the floor. She didn’t budge, but her expression told me she was concerned. I was hoping she was scared. “What happened to my picture?”
“I broke it. What does it look like?” I slurred belligerently.
She eyed me strangely. “Travis… are you drunk?”
“You damn right I’m drunk! And I’m gonna get drunker. Now where the hell have you been?” I shouted.
“Um… well… I…” She wouldn’t make eye contact, and that just made things worse. As far as I was concerned, it just proved she was doing something she had no business doing. An image of her and Malek flashed in my mind and I just lost it. I knocked everything off the bar to get her attention.
“Look at me, goddamn it! I already know you weren’t at work. Now, where the hell were you?” My hands were shaking and I was trying my best to control my temper, but it was getting hard. I guess I was expecting her to act shocked or pretend she didn’t know what I was talking about, but she just lowered her head without a word. “Answer me, Stephanie! Where the fuck were you?”
When she didn’t answer, I kicked the coffee table in my rage, and the wood splintered with a loud crack. Stephanie screamed loud enough for the entire neighborhood to hear. But I didn’t care who was listening. I just wanted answers. And the fact that she wasn’t giving me any was pissing me off even more.
“Goddamn it, I asked you a question!” I reached for her and she stepped back out of my grasp.
“What the fuck is wrong with you? Have you lost your mind?” She was scared, real scared, and believe it or not, so was I. Scared of what I might do if I got my hands on her.
“Yeah, maybe I have lost my mind. But if I have, it’s your fault!” I reached out to grab her again. This time I wasn’t letting her get away. “I’m not gonna ask you again. Where the fuck were you?”
“Let her go, Travis! She was with me.” The voice came from behind me. I turned around and there was Jasmine, holding my son with one arm and Maleka’s hand with the other. I let Stephanie go and she ran to her sister’s side.
“She wasn’t with you. She can’t stand you. Why the hell would she lie to me about being with you?” I really hadn’t meant to say it that way. It wasn’t Jasmine I wanted to hurt, but the alcohol was talking.
Jasmine frowned in Stephanie’s direction. “She was with me ’cause no matter what you say she feels about me, she’s my sister and I needed her.”
“Ha! What do I look like, a fool? I may be drunk, but I’m not stupid. Do you really expect me to believe that shit? I don’t know what she has on you, but I don’t believe a word you’re saying.”
“Are you calling me a liar, Travis? I don’t have to lie to you.” She actually looked insulted.
“Neither does Stephanie. If she was with you, why’d she lie to me about doing overtime? She could’ve told me the truth. I wouldn’t have stopped her.”
Jasmine released Maleka’s hand, then handed the baby to Stephanie. She marched over to me and stood inches away from my face.
“You wanna know why, Travis? This is why.” She re moved her sunglasses.
“Damn! What happened to your eye?” She looked like she’d just gone ten rounds with Muhammad Ali.
“The same thing I just stopped you from doing to my sister,” she sighed as she placed the glasses back on her head. “Look at this place, Travis. I can’t believe you. I never thought I’d ever see you act this way. Is this the example you wanna set for your son?”
I felt like I was shrinking in front of her. I surveyed the damage I’d done in the room: the broken picture frame, the splintered coffee table, and the frightened look on Maleka’s face. I felt like a fool. I’d jumped to conclusions about Stephanie’s whereabouts a little too quickly. I should’ve had a little more faith. I should’ve trusted her more. And to make matters even worse, T. J. was crying and Stephanie was on the verge.
“She was really with you?” My voice was humbled and unsure, sorry I had rushed to judgment.
“Yes,” Jasmine nodded. “She’s been with me ever since I left Ryan’s.”
I lowered my head and stepped toward Stephanie. She flinched backwards, so I froze. I’d really fucked up. I had to proceed very carefully now.
“Is that true, Steph? Were you with Jasmine?” She glanced at her sister before she nodded at me.
“Oh, shit.” I covered my face as I lowered my head. “I’m sorry, baby. I’m really so sorry. You know how much I love you. I just thought…” I took a step forward, then stopped.
I expected her to curse me out after I was so stupid, but she burst into tears and wrapped her arms around me. The baby squirmed between us as we held each other tight.
“I’m sorry, baby. I love you, too. I’m never gonna lie to you again, not even for my sister.” She looked up at me and I kissed her tears away.
I said a quick prayer to thank God for giving me back my family. I coulda sworn I heard Jasmine suck her teeth behind me, but I wasn’t gonna get into that. She was probably just jealous that she was the sister stuck with a no-good jailbird and one hell of a black eye. Oh well, maybe me and Stephanie could set a good enough example that she’d wake up and dump that guy someday soon.
17
It was late, almost midnight. I couldn’t fall asleep because Travis had been rubbing his thing up against my butt for the past hour. I was trying to pretend I was asleep, but I knew it was only a matter of time before he got frustrated and started shaking me to wake up. Even worse, I was afraid he might try to get my panties down far enough so that he could slip himself inside me. Not that I could blame him if he did. I’d promised him this morning that I was gonna give him some tonight. He’d been back from maneuvers in the field for over a week, and with the kids sick with colds and both of us taking night classes, we just hadn’t had the time or opportunity to be intimate. Travis had let me know this morning that he couldn’t wait any longer. The bad thing about all this was that I had an itch that needed to be scratched myself, only I hadn’t waited for Travis to take care of it.
Earlier in the day, I stopped by Nana’s house to drop off some pictures of the kids and ran into Malek. The next thing I knew we were in bed together. You’d think after all the shit that happened with Jasmine and with Travis nearly losing his mind that I’d have enough common sense to leave Malek alone. But that wasn’t the case. Every time I looked at him I’d get weak and throw common sense to the wind.
“Steph? You awake?” Travis whispered as he kissed my neck.
“I am now,” I told him groggily, pulling the covers up around my neck. My neck was my weak spot and Travis knew it. If he kissed me there and I didn’t respond, he’d get the message.