She stares back at me and, for the first time since Rosa’s death, I feel like she’s finally seeing me again. She says nothing but drops her hands from my hair to my face, her delicate fingers exploring. “I’m going to help you, Emily. I’m going to get you through this. Will you trust me to help you?”
She nods, her expression still sad but it’s a start. I encircle her wrist and press a kiss to the palm of her hand before pinning it over her head and entwining our fingers. “Feel me, baby. Feel how much I love you.” I start thrusting into her tight heat with steady strokes.
She moans and arches against me. “I do, but I need more, Ryder, I want…”
She gasps as I flip us over and reverse our positions, my cock seated deep inside of her as she straddles me. “Take what you need you, Emily. Show me what you want, baby.”
She licks her lips and braces her hands on my abs. As hard as it is for me, I stay still, letting her take the lead. At first her movements are slow and unsure so I grab her hip to help guide her. Soon she finds her own rhythm, and fuck me is she a sight to behold. Her tousled hair tumbles down her shoulders, framing her perfect tits. Her expression is soft and sweet; her exotic ice blue eyes are now lit more with desire than pain. Her flawless, golden skin glows from the sweat our bodies are creating. She looks like a motherfucking angel, my angel.
Reaching up, I palm the heavy weight of her breasts, tugging and tweaking her pretty, pink nipples. With a moan, her hands cover my own and she increases her pace. “That’s it, baby, fuck me.” I jerk my hips up into her and feel her pussy flutter around me.
Her head falls back on a whimper. “God, Ryder, you’re so deep like this. I feel you everywhere and it feels so good.”
Jesus, she is going to kill me. I’m so close to the fucking edge already. I’ve fucking needed to feel her like this for days, needed to know she was going to be okay.
I slip my hands out from under hers, and place hers where mine just were. “Touch yourself, Em, show me what you like.” She stills and bites her bottom lip. Sensing her shyness, I help her start, making her knead the soft flesh. Her hips pick up pace again, and when I feel her let go of her inhibition I remove my hands and watch while she abandons herself to her touch. “That’s it, baby, fuck that’s sexy.” I grab one of her hips now in a firm grip while I take my other hand and slide my knuckle through her wet slit. The same time I find her swollen nub, I slam up inside of her.
“Oh god, that feels so good.” She whimpers. “Don’t stop, Ryder, please, fuck me.”
With a growl that’s exactly what I do. Keeping my grip firm on her hip, I pound up inside of her while continuing to circle her clit. Her cries sound around us and I feel the nub get firmer with ever stroke of my finger and every hard thrust of my cock.
“Oh god, I’m going to come.”
“Give it to me, Em, come all over my cock.” As soon as the words leave my mouth that’s exactly what she does. I feel her pussy clamp down on me as she throws her head back in ecstasy. “Fuck, yes!” I keep my pace, fucking her through her pleasure, until her tight, wet heat triggers my own release. Fire spreads through my body moments before I still and come inside her hot depths.
She drops down on top of me and buries her face in my neck, her body limp and sated. Once we finally catch our breath, I roll her under me and pull out of her.
I go to get up but she wraps her arms tightly around me and turns her face in my neck. “Don’t leave me.”
My chest constricts at the soft plea and I bury my face in her sweet-smelling hair. “Never, baby. I’m just going to get something. I’ll be right back.” I kiss the side of her head then head to the bathroom.
I wet a cloth with hot water then ring it out before walking back to Emily. The sheet is partly draped over her now as she stares up at the ceiling. She acknowledges my presence by looking up at me, and although her eyes are still sad I can see her in them.
Sitting next to her on the bed, I pull the sheet off her body then open her legs. She watches me as I clean her with the hot cloth, her expression soft but a little unsure. I lean down and press a kiss to her smooth stomach, and she threads her fingers in my hair, holding me to her.
“I’m sorry I’m so sad. I’m sorry I’m hurting you,” she whispers through the dark and silent room. I look up to see her staring at the ceiling again.
I quickly finish cleaning her then throw the rag in the hamper across the room before lying down beside her. I arrange her so she’s facing me then pull her in close. “You don’t have to be sorry for being sad, Em. I know you’re hurting, baby. Your pain hurts me, but you aren’t.”
“I just can’t believe she’s gone and that I’m never going to see her again.” The last of her words trail off on a sob, her expression twisting with grief. I hold her closer, wishing more than anything I could take her pain away. “Other than Summer she’s the only true family I’ve ever had. How am I supposed to live without her, Ryder?”
I swallow thickly, feeling like someone just punched me in the fucking throat. “You live for me because I need you. I know it hurts right now, but I swear, Em, I will help you through this.”
“It kills me to know my father did this to her. How could he just kill her like that, and what the hell happened? What went wrong?”
“I don’t know, but I fucking promise you I’m going to find out and I’ll make sure that every single fucking person who had a hand in her death pays.”
She looks up at me. “I’ve decided to do the hypnotherapy. I’m going to call Doctor Ross tomorrow and get in as soon as possible.”
“I’m not sure that’s a good idea, Em. You have been through a lot the last little while, I’m worried it will be too much for you, and…”
“No more waiting, Ryder. I need to do this. For myself, for Rosa. I know you and Nick have been putting plans in place for the charity dinner, but if I can remember what happened all those years ago we might have more to go off.” I inhale a deep breath, panic threatening to choke me as I think about something happening to her over this. “Please tell me you’re with me,” she whispers.
I lean down and kiss her head. “Yeah, baby, I’m with you. I’m always with you, whatever you decide I’ll be there.”
She gives me a sad smile but it’s the first smile I’ve seen on her since Rosa. She reaches up and lays her hand on the side of my face. “I love you too, Ryder. I never stopped.”
Even though I figured she did, it still feels fucking good to hear her say it, she’s the only person who’s ever said those words to me. I lean down and press a kiss to her forehead. “Me too, Em. Everything is going to be okay, I promise. We’ll get through this.” And I meant what I said. I’m going to find out what happened to Rosa, and I’m going to make every fucking person pay.
Chapter 21
Ryder
A few days later we’re standing in Doctor Hughes’ therapy clinic, a therapist who Doctor Ross referred Emily to for her hypnotherapy session. The place is empty and quiet like we requested. Other than the doctor and Emily, the only other people who are here is Nick and myself. I had asked Emily if it was okay for Nick to come because I needed a second set of ears for anything regarding our case. My head is too goddamn messed up from worrying about her through all of this to focus on much else. And considering the information could be extremely critical to our investigation, I had to make sure someone had a clear head for it.
“Hello, Miss Michaels, it’s nice to finally meet you in person.” Doctor Hughes greets Emily with a smile and a handshake.
She smiles back but it’s forced. Even though she’s been trying to hide it I can tell she’s scared, and I’m not going to deny the fact that I am too. Probably even more than she is.
“It’s nice to meet you too, Doctor Hughes, and please, call me Emily.”
He nods. “All right, Emily it is.”
Em gestures toward me. “This is my boyfriend, Ryder, who I told you about.”