Centaur against centaur…centaur against human…It was those nightmarish thoughts that swam through Brighid’s tumultuous mind. This was her responsibility. She was a Dhianna centaur. With her mother’s death, leadership of the herd shifted to her shoulders, and the weight of it seemed to press into her soul. It didn’t matter now that she had yearned for, and then chosen, another path in life. Brighid swallowed down the bitter taste of fate that rose thick in her throat.
“Midhir, will you help me journey to the Otherworld and drink of Epona’s Chalice so that I may become a High Shaman?” she said grimly.
CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
“He cannot.” Etain’s clear voice was a spark that sizzled in the silence following Brighid’s request.
“What do you mean he cannot?” Cuchulainn said. “A High Shaman always guides another on his or her quest to find Epona’s Chalice.”
“You should have paid more attention to your teachers when they attempted to educate you about the Otherworld, my son,” Midhir said, tempering the harshness of his words with a quick smile.
“Mairearad should have guided Brighid on her Otherworld journey,” Etain said.
“But my mother is dead.”
“She could still guide you,” Etain said softly.
“No! I won’t accept her guidance. It won’t come without a price, and I know it will be too costly-for my soul as well as for the Dhianna Herd.”
“The spirit guide must be one who is closely tied to you, through blood or lifemate bond,” Midhir explained. “Though I am Partholon’s High Shaman, I cannot usurp that position.”
“I will have to find the Chalice on my own,” she said slowly. And as she spoke the words she felt a chill of despair at the prospect of the lonely, dangerous ordeal ahead of her. “My brother is the only blood relative I have left to me, and it is his position I will assume if I become High Shaman. He would not aid me in taking it from him.” This is impossible, Brighid told herself. Becoming a High Shaman is difficult enough. Alone I will have little chance of success. But I have no choice, and I must get used to being alone. If I succeed I will return to a life that breeds loneliness.
“Then your guide must be your lifemate,” Cuchulainn said.
All eyes turned to the warrior, but his attention was focused on Brighid. “I admit that, as my father has already said, I did not mind my lessons on the Otherworld. It is well known that I have never wanted any traffic with that realm, but it seems my fate must lie in that direction. I’ve tried to deny it-it will not be denied. I’ve even run from it-I will not be foolish enough to do so again. I can’t guide you, but what I can do is give you my oath that I will not let you walk that shadowy path alone. My strength will be yours if you are in need. My sword arm will always be raised to protect you. Perhaps together we can finish this quest and claim your birthright.”
She could hardly believe what she was hearing. Didn’t he understand that-?
“But you’re not my lifemate!” Brighid blurted.
“I will be if you accept me.”
She shook her head, wondering if everyone could hear the painful pounding of her heart. “You don’t have to do this just to help me. I’m not afraid to travel to the Otherworld alone,” she lied. “A lifemating is not something that should be undertaken to help a friend in need.”
Cuchulainn’s smile was intimate and knowing. He stepped close to her and took her hand. “We have been friends. But, my beautiful Huntress, we have become much more. My soul tells me that I am willing to gamble on a lifemating with you. What does your soul tell you?”
She shook her head. “What my soul tells me is not important if I cannot become a High Shaman. Think, Cuchulainn! If I can’t shapeshift you have shackled yourself to someone who cannot truly be your wife.”
His hand tightened on hers, and even though his next question was directed at Etain, his gaze never left Brighid’s. “Mother, if Father lost the ability to shapeshift, and could never come to you in human form again, would you still be his wife?”
“Of course. It’s not your father’s form that binds me to him,” Etain said firmly.
“But they’ve had years together,” Brighid said. “They’ve had children and shared each other’s lives and bed for decades.”
“I’m willing to bet that we will, too,” Cuchulainn said.
“You’re willing to bet your life and your future?”
“I am, because I’m willing to do something I’ve not allowed myself to do until now-I’m going to listen to my own spirit. I’m done running from my fate.” He shrugged and smiled at her. “I also believe that you will make a very fine High Shaman. So, Brighid Dhianna, what does your soul tell you?”
She looked into his turquoise eyes and felt lost-and found. “It tells me that this is an impossible dream, but one that I don’t want to end.”
His smile was filled with promise. He kissed her quickly and then turned, and dropped to one knee before Elphame.
“Elphame, as Chieftain of Clan MacCallan, I ask your permission to make your Huntress my lifemate.” He grinned, and for a moment he looked every bit the rakish warrior of his youth. “I would ask her brother’s permission, but I believe, all things considered, that would be rather unwise.”
Instead of returning Cu’s smile and automatically awarding her blessing, Elphame’s expression was strained and sober. “You said it yourself, Cu. You have shunned the Otherworld and the Realm of Spirits. Will you help or hinder Brighid? More rests upon this mating than a life bond. If this joining is the wrong choice, all of Partholon will suffer the ramifications.” Elphame looked from her brother to their mother. “I cannot give Cuchulainn my permission unless Epona approves of this mating.” She ignored her brother’s grunt of annoyance, along with Brighid’s sharp, questioning gaze, and continued to beseech Etain. “Would you ask Epona’s blessing on them? If the Goddess grants it, I will gladly give my permission.”
“Elphame, what-” Cuchulainn began, but his mother cut him off.
“You are a wise and responsible Chieftain, Elphame. I am proud of you.” Etain crooked her finger at her frowning son. “Come.” And then while he got to his feet, she held a hand out to Brighid. “And you, too, child.”
Feeling her stomach tighten with nerves, Brighid took Etain’s hand. Cuchulainn took her other.
The Beloved of Epona smiled at them. “You must link hands, too, and complete the circle.”
Cu’s frown softened when he laced his fingers with Brighid’s. He squeezed her hand and she held tight to him. Then the High Priestess lifted her face and evoked the presence of her Goddess.
My Epona, Goddess of shimmering beauty
for whom the stars are shining jewels,
and the earth Your sacred trust,
weaver of destinies
and protectress of things wild and free.
As your Chosen One, Beloved and touched by You,
I do ask now if You will grant
Thy blessing upon this mating.
Show us through sign, or vision, or word
Your wisdom and Your will.
Instantly the air above the circle made by their linked hands began to swirl and shimmer. Two forms took shape within the brilliance. Brighid gasped as she recognized Cuchulainn’s torso, naked and muscular, shining with his golden light. And then another torso took shape from the diamond-sparked mist. It shimmered with a bright silver light. It was her own naked body wrapped within Cuchulainn’s strong arms. When the apparitions’ lips met, Brighid was filled with the liquid heat of newly awakened passion. She heard Cu’s deep intake of breath, and knew he felt the joining of their spirits, too. Then the air spiraled, whirlpooling into a mass of glittering sparks before the vision dissipated with the sound of rain-soaked wind.
Etain smiled. “You have the Goddess’s blessing, my son.”