Baldy Li nodded. "Yes."
Tao Qing declared sternly, "The appointment and removal of the factory director should be approved by committee, discussed first with the head of the Civil Affairs Bureau, and then approved by the county government."
Baldy Li nodded repeatedly. "Yes, that's right, you can officially remove the former factory director, and then officially hire me for the same position."
Tao Qing became serious. "I don't have that authority."
"Director Tao, you are too modest." Baldy Li laughed as he pointed to Tao Qing. "When it comes to who serves as the director of the Good Works Factory, doesn't your word go?"
Tao Qing didn't know whether to laugh or cry and replied, "You simply don't follow the rules, do you?"
What came next rendered Tao Qing even more at a loss for words. Baldy Li, who seemed to have already appointed himself factory director, escorted Tao Qing on a tour of the workshop in charge of gluing cardboard boxes, where fourteen handicapped workers all greeted him by calling out, "Director Li!" Even the original two crippled factory directors respectfully called out, "Director Li." Factory Director Baldy Li stood next to Bureau Director Tao Qing and applauded vigorously, as did the fourteen handicapped workers. Baldy Li felt that the applause was not loud enough and therefore shouted to his loyal minions, "Director Tao has come to see us! Make your applause as loud as fireworks!"
His loyal minions applauded so vigorously that their entire bodies swung into motion. Baldy Li still felt that it was not enough, and gestured frantically, saying, "Shout, ‘Welcome, Bureau Director Tao!'"
The two cripples and the four blind men all shouted at the top of their lungs, "Welcome, Bureau Director Tao!"
The five deaf workers opened their mouths and laughed, not knowing what the two cripples and four blind workers were shouting. Baldy Li rushed over and signaled for the deaf workers to watch his lips. His mouth opened and closed like a fish spurting out water, and finally he was able to teach the five deaf workers the correct formations. Of the five, three were also mute, and therefore only two of them were able to vocalize at all. The sound of the "Welcome, Bureau Director Tao" was now deafening, which pleased Baldy Li immensely, and he gave everyone a thumbs-up sign. Then Baldy Li discovered a new problem, which was that the three idiots couldn't pronounce the words "Bureau Director Tao" and instead were calling out, "Welcome, Factory Director Li." This embarrassed Baldy Li, and he immediately rushed over to the three idiots and taught them to shout "Welcome, Bureau Director Tao" as if he were teaching them to sing a song. Baldy Li's two arms danced up and down, his voice grew hoarse from shouting, but the three idiots still called out, "Welcome, Factory Director Li." Tao Qing couldn't help laughing, and Baldy Li said with embarrassment, "Director Tao, give me a little time. The next time you come, I guarantee that they'll all call out ‘Director Tao.'"
"No need." Tao Qing shook his head. "They are shouting ‘Director Li’ very capably."
When Tao Qing walked out of the workshop, he turned around, looked at the two crippled factory directors, and said to Baldy Li, "I originally thought that the two factory directors were mere figureheads, but now I realize that they can't even be considered ornaments."
Two months later, Baldy Li received his official appointment as the director of the Good Works Factory. Baldy Li was summoned to Tao Qing's office, where Tao read the county-approved promotion letter out loud. Baldy Li blushed with excitement and told Tao Qing that the three idiots at the Good Works Factory could now shout "Bureau Director Tao" quite fluently. Tao Qing laughed and confessed that there was considerable resistance to officially appointing Baldy Li as factory director, due to his spotty past. Tao Qing chuckled, but then confided quite seriously that everyone saw Baldy Li as his surrogate, and therefore he hoped Baldy Li would take better care of his public image and in particular curb his hoodlum behavior. Finally, he gave Baldy Li his profit target, sticking out two fingers and saying, "This year you must bring in two hundred thousand yuan in profit."
Baldy Li held up three fingers. "I will raise three hundred thousand yuan, and if I don't, I will resign."
Tao Qing nodded with satisfaction. Baldy Li rolled up the appointment letter approved by the county government and was about to stick it in his pocket when Tao Qing pointed to the document and said, "What are you doing with that?"
Baldy Li said, "I'm taking it home."
Tao Qing shook his head. "You really don't understand how things are done. This document must be taken to the Organization Bureau for filing; you are now a national cadre."
"I'm a national cadre?" Baldy Li registered a look of pleasurable shock, adding, "Then it is all the more important that I take this home to show Song Gang."
Tao Qing recalled the Song Gang he knew from twenty years earlier — a pitiful but adorable little boy. Tao hesitated a moment, then he agreed to let Baldy Li take the appointment letter home to show Song Gang, but on the condition that he return it the very next afternoon. As Baldy Li was leaving he bowed to Tao Qing and said earnestly, "Thank you, Director Tao, for appointing me factory director."
Tao Qing patted his shoulder and said, "What are you thanking me for? It was you who carried out the execution first and sought a permit for it later."
The expression to carry out the execution first and seek a permit for it later gave Baldy Li a good chuckle. After walking out of the courtyard of the Civil Affairs Bureau, he repeated the phrase to himself yet again, but this time he found that it had somehow soured on his lips.
Carrying the appointment letter in his hands, Baldy Li walked home and showed the letter to everyone he met, telling them proudly that he was now Director Li. When he encountered Blacksmith Tong on the bridge, he pulled Tong over to sit next to him on the railing and proudly told him he was now director of the Good Works Factory. He added that, actually, he had long been running the factory but, extending the letter with trembling hands, he added, "This piece of paper makes it official."
"That's right," Blacksmith Tong agreed. "Its just like a marriage certificate — who waits until the day of their marriage before sleeping together? The marriage certificate simply grants them an official identity. This is called legitimization."
"Yes, legitimization—that's what it's called," Baldy Li exclaimed, adding, "It's as if I knocked a girl up and left her no choice but to marry me. Or, as Director Tao put it, I carried out the execution first and sought a permit for it later."
When Baldy Li returned home, Song Gang had prepared lunch, had set the table, and was sitting there waiting for him. Baldy Li, flushed with success, sat down at the table, glanced disdainfully at the food, and muttered, "The formidable Factory Director Li has to eat this cheap food every day."
Song Gang did not realize that Baldy Li had been officially appointed factory director and thought that he was still bragging about his de facto directorship. He grinned, then picked up his rice bowl and began to eat, whereupon Baldy Li opened up his director's-appointment letter and extended it for Song Gang to read. Song Gang read it while chewing his rice, then excitedly jumped up from his seat and started crying out. Since his mouth was still full of food, however, he was totally incomprehensible. He spat the food into his hand and shouted, "Baldy Li, you really are—"
Baldy Li calmly corrected Song Gang, "I'm Director Li."
"Director Li, you really are Director Li!"
Song Gong excitedly cried out as he jumped around the house, shouting "Director Li" over and over again, pounding Baldy Li in the chest three times with his fist full of food, splattering the food all over Baldy Li's face. Baldy Li wiped Song Gang's chewed-up food from his face and began laughing uncontrollably. But Song Gang was still pounding his chest with his fist, so Baldy Li sprang out of the way. It was like the time when Song Gang returned from the countryside, travel bag in hand: The two of them ran around the room laughing hysterically, with Song Gang chasing Baldy Li and Baldy Li trying to stay out of the way of Song Gang's fist. They upended all the chairs and stools in the room and jostled the table so hard that the bowls of rice and food went flying. Song Gang finally lowered his fist and, realizing that he was still clutching the food he had spit out of his mouth, wiped his hand with a rag. He tidied up the spilled food on the table and straightened up the chairs that had been knocked over. Then, making a please gesture to Baldy Li, who was still laughing hysterically, he bowed and said, "Director Li, please eat."