“That’s bullshit,” Forrest said. “Starvation isn’t rabies. Gandhi starved himself damned near to death more than once just to make a fucking point.”
“Well, I ain’t Gandhi either,” Vasquez said, and chuckled.
“What I’m saying is that giving up your dignity is a conscious choice,” Forrest said. “It’s a choice you make ahead of time. You decide that you’re either going to throw in the towel after a certain point or you’re going to be the last one standing no matter the cost.”
“I won’t argue that. But if the military hit that wind farm, the common grunt didn’t have that luxury.”
“Horseshit. No one hit that farm who didn’t want to. A man can step back and take stock of himself at any time.”
Vasquez sat forward in the chair. “That might be true for you, Captain. You’re a leader… not all of us are. Some of us are happy to follow, and not all followers are lucky about who they get as leaders. Personally… without you two dudes… I don’t know how I’d handle any of this.”
Forrest stood up and tousled the younger man’s hair on his way to the coffeepot. “Well, not all leaders are lucky about who they get to follow them either.”
Ulrich smiled at Vasquez, hiding his concern about what Forrest referred to as the “insulin habit.” He and Forrest had asked Vasquez and Danzig both to come in on the project precisely because they were followers. They were not blind devotees, but were highly skilled operatives who could be depended upon to follow orders in a paramilitary setting without a great deal of debate. Kane of course was his own story. He was their noncommissioned officer, the perfect blend of capable and aloof; that he agreed to join them had been as much a compliment as their having asked.
“You’re sure you didn’t talk to those people last night?” Ulrich said, shifting his attention to Forrest. “We don’t need a proper military outfit showing up outside our door.”
“Wayne… come on ”
“I just don’t want any surprises, Jack.”
“I was only on the air for a few seconds…” Forrest kept his face serious.
“What… ?”
“Long enough to broadcast our address five or six times.” Then Forrest smiled.
Ulrich shook his head, Vasquez grinning.
“Ask a stupid question,” Forrest said, sipping his coffee, “and ye shall receive a stupid answer.”
Forty-One
The Halloween party, especially Forrest’s surprise box of candy, was a big hit with the children. The next day, however, the mothers were a little less than thrilled about the candy, the first sweets the kids had eaten since coming to live in the silo nearly five months earlier. They had gotten into it first thing that morning and were now so hyper that Andie found herself completely unable to hold their attention during class.
After forty minutes of fruitless effort, she released them all back into the care of their mothers and went to find Forrest, cornering him below the main facility outside the entrance to the electrical room.
“Do you know what you’ve done giving out all that candy at once?”
“Other than putting you mothers on the spot?” he said, wiping the sweat from his face and neck with a towel.
“Yeah, other than that. There are thirteen kids upstairs running around like little maniacs on a sugar high. I had to dismiss class already.”
He stood looking at her, struggling to keep the smile from his face.
“What do they get for Christmas? A bag of cocaine?”
He snickered. “Maybe. You’ll have to wait and see.”
“Did you give any thought at all to the fact those kids haven’t had any sugar to speak of in almost five months?”
“I don’t believe you’re down here chewing my ass because I gave the kids Halloween candy.” He flipped the towel over his shoulder. “What’s really got you in a twist?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” she said, crossing her arms in an effort to disguise a sudden insecurity. “Don’t try to change the subject.”
“Well, to answer your question. Yes. I did give it some thought. In fact, the mummy and I had ourselves quite a laugh about it last night as we were passing it out.”
“Well, that was irresponsible as hell.”
“Yes, it was, wasn’t it?” he said with a grin. “And yet I’ve succeeded in adding a little bit of harmless drama to all of your otherwise monotonous lives. Even to my own, it turns out.”
She bit the inside of her cheek, failing to hide a smile as she recognized his deviousness. “You’re a manipulator, Jack Forrest.”
“I’m a goddamn wizard, is what I am. This little Halloween stunt of mine will be good for days’ worth of conversation and playful recrimination—just like we’re having right now. And when it finally wears off, God willing, I’ll find something else irresponsible to do in order to keep you women distracted and away from one another’s throats. That is unless you decide to go upstairs and blow my goddamn cover.”
She laughed, shaking her head in perplexity. “How does Veronica manage you?”
“She doesn’t.”
“I don’t know whether to envy her or to feel sorry for her.”
“Oh, yes, you do.”
Her eyebrows soared. “Egotistical much?”
“Lady, I goddamn well better be. I’m trying to pull off the coup of the century down here and I need all the juice I can get.”
Andie could tell from his body language that all she had to do to seduce him was say something, anything, to prompt him. Anything that would absolve him of responsibility for something happening between them, however flimsy. Her body ached for a man, her chest constricting. But she couldn’t bring herself to tell him how badly she needed him. Was it pride? Or fear of offending Veronica and losing her friendship? In the end it probably came down to both.
“Don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me,” she said quietly, feeling suddenly deflated. “I didn’t mean any—”
“You didn’t give any. This has been the most excitement I’ve had in weeks. Feel free to make up a reason to berate me anytime.”
Her jaw dropped but she didn’t say anything, knowing she was busted and that to deny it would only make her look silly.
“Bring a friend if you like,” he added, by way of being a smartass.
“Maybe I will,” she said, playfully contemptuous. “You’re definitely the man for this job, Jack.”
“We all do what we’re called to do.”
“Oh, that’s such bullshit,” she said laughing. “You wouldn’t be anywhere else and you know it.”
He entered Launch Control later that day—after hearing about his questionable judgment of the night before from at least three other mothers—and sat down beside Kane for a look at the monitors, already bored.
“Snowing a little bit, finally.”
Kane looked up from his worn copy of X-Box Magazine for a glance at the monitor. “Was only a matter of time.”
“How many times can you read the same magazine? Christ, we’ve got a few hundred books downstairs.”
“I’m reading up for the tournament.”
“What tournament?”
“Football tournament. Me, Linus, Oscar, and a bunch of the kids. Winner gets to eat the others’ desserts for a week.”
“You’re going to take food from the kids… and the women think I’m bad.”
Kane laughed. “You should hear the smack those kids are talkin’, man.”