He kissed her.
But the world didn’t end, though Gambit nearly died, and Rogue tortured herself. She’d learned his secrets, secrets she would rather not have known, and when they finally came back together, he asked her to enter his mind again, so she would know his truth. No more secrets. No lies. They could leave the past behind them and move on, together.
But she couldn’t do it. Wouldn’t risk him. So she left him.
They were pulled together and apart, time after time, again and again. I’d never forget when he asked her to trust him, even though she had no reason to. He said he’d make it right the second he was able. Told her that her heart meant more to him than his own.
I knew just how he felt.
She’d haunted my dreams. Lived in my thoughts all day. I wanted to call her. I needed to see her. But I’d resigned myself to wait. There was no way to reach her, and I had to believe she would come to me when she was ready.
I wondered where she was, what she was doing. Wondered if she’d been thinking about me all day, wishing things were different. It’s all I’d done since I walked away from her.
At least I had a cabinet full of scotch to help me pass the time, to help me forget.
I sighed and stood, my body stiff as I made my way into the kitchen for a scotch bottle that wasn’t empty. My hand was on the neck of the lucky bottle when the doorbell rang.
My heart stopped. Maggie.
I set the bottle down with trembling hands, walked to the door in a haze, my neurons firing with a billion thoughts at once. What I’d say. What she’d say. How I’d feel. I could see her in my mind, angry, happy, sad, hurt.
I opened the door, and my heart fell.
West fumed in the entry, jaw set, eyes hard.
I squared my shoulders, dropped my chin. “Did your fist have more to say?”
“She’s gone, and it’s your fault.”
I blinked, shook my head, wondered if I’d heard him right. “What do you mean, she’s gone?”
“She left. She went home.” He pulled a letter out of his pocket and shoved it into my chest.
I took it and unfurled it, feeling her presence in the curve of the letters as West brushed past me and into the room.
I’m so sorry for all the trouble I’ve caused. If I had stayed home where I belong, no one would have gotten hurt. I’ve been selfish at all of your expense.
I’m going back to Jackson to sort myself out. Lily, I’m sorry that I asked you to keep my secret from West. West, I’m sorry we lied to you. And Cooper, I’m just sorry.
I just hope you’ll all forgive me.
—Maggie
“Fuck.” I ran a hand through my hair as I stared at the letter. “How … have you talked to her?”
“I called my dad as soon as Lily showed me the letter. They found her bag at the shelter, and she picked it up and went straight to the airport.”
I walked to the bar and dropped into a seat, my eyes still on her words.
“What did you do to her, Cooper?”
“I just wanted to be with her.”
“Bullshit. She didn’t leave town because you care about her.”
The look I gave him must have gotten to him because he shifted, looking uncertain.
“Then why?”
I shook my head, not knowing where to even start. “Jimmy.” I ran a hand over my mouth. “He sent her that fucking box and knocked her out of orbit. She asked me for time to sort through it, but she came here yesterday and needed me, then turned around and treated me like a mistake. I couldn’t fucking do it anymore, West. I couldn’t go on having her one minute and losing her the next. This isn’t some one night stand. This isn’t a fling. I love her.”
He eyed me. “Do you mean that?”
I didn’t answer, just met his eyes and breathed.
“How the fuck is this possible?” West rubbed his forehead. “How the fuck are you telling me right now that you’re actually in love with my sister? When did this happen?”
“It’s been happening for weeks. Since before that, even.”
His eyes narrowed. “Since when?”
I took a deep breath and told him. “Since her wedding night.”
His fists clenched by his side, ears red and lips tight. “You fucking took advantage of her on her wedding night?”
I put out a hand. “Calm the fuck down, West. Are you listening to anything I’ve said? Anything? I wouldn’t take advantage of her. I wouldn’t do anything to hurt her because her happiness is more important than my own. I’ve never felt like this … you know I don’t … I can’t …” I couldn’t even bring myself to say the words, so I took a breath. “Maggie is a singular event in my life. I want her. Forever.”
He shook his head. “I can’t fucking understand this. Does she feel the same way?”
“She said she did. We were going to tell you together when we came back from the Hamptons—”
He groaned. “Of course she was with you.”
I glared at him. “Is this really the worst thing that could happen? I didn’t fuck her and bail — I didn’t break her. I’m trying to help put her back together, for chrissake. I love her. I want to help her. What the fuck is the problem here?”
West was quiet for a moment, still angry, but he’d heard me that time. I took the opening.
“You know I’d never do anything to hurt you. I’d never do anything to jeopardize our friendship. Ever. I wouldn’t risk it unless I had no other choice. And I don’t have a choice, not when it comes to Maggie.”
He watched me.
I watched him back. “Do you believe me?”
His fist clenched again. “Yes.”
“Can you stop eyeing me like you want to hit me?”
He took a heavy breath and rubbed his face as if he would wipe the look away. “I need a drink.”
“That I can do.” I got up and poured us each a scotch.
West took his and sipped it. If it hadn’t been a three-hundred-dollar bottle, he probably would have slammed it.
I took a sip of mine and leaned on the counter. “Is she okay?”
He sighed and took a seat at the bar, looking tired. “It’s hard to say. She wasn’t busted up or crying or anything, which somehow makes me worry about her even more. I don’t know. We didn’t talk for long, and she wouldn’t talk about you at all, past apologizing for keeping it from me and asking Lily to get in the middle of it.”
“So you found out about Lily, huh?”
“Yeah, I didn’t handle that well either.” He took a drink and sat down. “I snapped at her and blew out of there. I was just so fucking pissed and shocked and … I don’t know. I hate that she kept that from me, but I get it. Y’all had me pegged right.”
“We didn’t want to tell you until we were sure we wanted to be together. I can’t say it was innocent from the start, because deep down, that first night, I knew. I just knew it was more than that. She needed me, and I saved her the only way I knew how.”
He nodded at his drink with a sigh. “I’m sorry I punched you.”
“I’m sorry I fucked your sister.”
He glared at me.
I smirked. “Too soon?”
West snorted and brought the glass to his lips. “It’ll probably always be too soon for that.” He knocked it back.
“So what now?”
He sighed. “I don’t know. I think we’ve gotta leave her be. Let her figure it out on her own. Be there if she needs us.”
I took a drink, hating the plan and knowing he was right. “I’ve got to at least apologize.”
“What for?”
“Chasing her. Pushing her. Trying to force her hand.”
He shook his head. “You can try to call her, but I don’t know if she’ll talk to you.”
“I don’t either, but I have to try.”
“Maybe sober up first. Don’t waste your only bullet because you’d been drinking scotch for …” he sniffed, “eighteen hours.”