Danny brought his lips to the crown of her head. “Thank you,” he said before kissing her there. “And I just want you to know that…I won’t do that again,” he added softly.
“Do what again?” she asked, trailing her fingertips over his waist, and she felt his stomach muscles twitch in response.
“I won’t lose it like that again. Tonight was…” He shook his head. “It’s out of my system.”
Leah lifted her head, resting her chin on his chest as she looked at him. “No, it’s not,” she said softly. “And you can’t expect it to be.”
Danny blinked up at the ceiling.
“I know what you meant before,” she said, laying her head back down on his chest as she played with his fingers. “That you don’t want to live the next two months under a cloud of dread. And I agree. We should try to enjoy as much of it as we can. But there will be days when we can’t ignore it. And that’s okay, Danny. It’s okay to need a time-out.” She pressed her lips to his chest. “Tonight was just one of those nights.”
Danny slid his hands under her arms and pulled her up the front of his body so that she was lying on top of him. He reached up, scooping her hair back into a ponytail and holding it there with one hand as he brought the other to her face.
“You are incredible,” he said tenderly, running his thumb over her lips, and she kissed the pad of it. “You are beautiful, and smart, and thoughtful, and perfect, and I don’t deserve you.”
“Well, that’s too bad, because you’re stuck with me,” she said, and he smiled up at her, using his hand in her hair to pull her mouth down to his.
The sound of her phone beeping with a text message interrupted the silence, and Leah lifted her head, breaking their kiss.
“That’s probably Sarah checking up on us,” she said, leaning over the side of the bed and swiping her phone from the nightstand. She lay back down on him, and he kept his hands on her waist as she opened the text.
And then she gasped loudly, shooting straight up in bed, and Danny bolted upright beside her.
“What is it? What happened?”
“Alexis is in labor!” she squealed, dropping the phone and clapping her hands quickly like a child.
Danny exhaled in a rush, running his hand down his face. “Jesus, you just scared the shit out of me.”
“Sorry,” she said, throwing herself forward and knocking him back onto the bed. She held her weight in her arms as she grinned down at him, and he laughed lightly, looking up at her.
“I’m gonna be an aunt!” she squeaked.
“You’re gonna be an aunt,” he repeated, tucking her hair behind her ear.
She sighed, lying down on his chest, and his hand came to her hair again, lazily running his fingers through it.
They lay there quietly for a while, and Leah listened to the rhythmic beating of Danny’s heart, letting it lull her into a state of serenity. Eventually the rise and fall of his chest evened out and became regular, and Leah assumed he had fallen asleep until his voice broke the silence.
“Do you ever think about having kids?”
Leah nuzzled his chest, relishing the gentle vibrations that rumbled through it as he spoke. “I do,” she said.
It was quiet for a beat before he said, “I remember being young, like twelve years old, and thinking about what a good dad I would be. I think it was because my dad was such a worthless bastard. Like, in a way, I wanted to prove to myself that I could do what he couldn’t.”
Leah lifted her head, resting her chin on his chest. “You’ll be an amazing dad,” she said gently.
He glanced down at her and smiled sadly. “I hope so. It’s just…I’m twenty-nine years old. And I’m about to lose some time. Maybe a lot. And I know men can have children whenever, but…women can’t.”
Suddenly, Leah remembered the night he met her family—the way he had looked at Christopher as he rubbed Alexis’s belly.
Leah lowered her head, pressing her lips against his chest as she spoke. “Even if it were five years,” she whispered hoarsely, “you’d be thirty-four. I’d be thirty-three. Women can still have children safely at thirty-three.”
The second the words left her mouth, she froze. Leah felt his chest stop moving, and she closed her eyes, turning away from him as she rested her cheek on his chest.
She couldn’t believe she had just said that.
They had only just said “I love you” for the first time, and already she was deducing that she would be the mother of his children.
“I didn’t mean…I wasn’t assuming…I was just trying to show you…” She fumbled over her words, eventually letting them trail off.
They both lay there, saying nothing, and although his hand still rested on her head, his fingers had stopped playing with her hair.
After what seemed like an interminable silence, Danny spoke, the low timbre of his voice penetrating the stillness.
“Leah?”
“Hmm?”
He trailed his hand over the side of her face, taking her chin in his hand and lifting it as he turned her toward him.
“I want them to be just like you.”
She stared at him, a slow smile spreading over her lips, and he lifted his head, bringing their mouths together.
And she wrapped her arms around him as they kissed, figuratively and literally embracing her future.
Leah and Danny sat on the couch outside his lawyer’s office.
Danny was resting his elbows on his knees, looking down at his hands as he wrung them together, and Leah sat next to him with her hand on the small of his back, rubbing her thumb back and forth. They didn’t speak, and she knew he probably preferred it that way. Each time she looked at his profile, she could see that his brow was pulled together, or his jaw was clenched. He looked so vulnerable, and she wished there was something she could do to make what he was feeling go away.
As much as the three of them tried to keep the conversation light on the ride to Brooklyn, there was an obvious undertone of anxiety. The last time Leah had seen Catherine, her smiles had been warm, inviting, genuine. This time they were strained and contrived.
Throughout the ride Danny contributed to the conversation, his voice sounding easy and fluid, but his body betrayed him. He sat up straight, his shoulders rigid and his hands tight on the wheel. Leah knew he could sense Catherine’s apprehension and grief, and it was slowly eating away at him.
When they arrived at the office, Danny’s lawyer—a man named Eric Warden—took Catherine inside immediately. As soon as the door closed behind them, Danny’s carefully cultivated façade melted away, and all of the stress and guilt Leah knew he’d been feeling all morning came rushing to the surface. And so they sat on the sofa in silence. She knew no words were capable of taking those feelings away, but she hoped her presence at least dulled them a little.
Catherine was in Eric’s office for a little under an hour. When she came out, she held several crumpled tissues in her hand. Her eyes were glassy and bloodshot, and she looked completely drained.
Leah watched an intense pain flicker behind Danny’s eyes before the façade was back in place, and he smiled, walking over to give her a hug.
When he let her go, Eric stepped back into his office and turned to Danny. “Ready?” he asked, and Danny nodded before he looked at Leah.
She walked over to them, putting her hand on Catherine’s shoulder. “Catherine, do you want to go have a cup of tea? I noticed a diner down the street when we got here.”
Danny nodded. “That’s a good idea, Gram. It’ll be more comfortable than waiting out here. I’ll meet you guys over there when I’m done.”
She smiled unsteadily. “That sounds lovely, sweetheart.”
Leah turned to Danny, giving him a hug as she brought her lips to his ear. “She’ll be fine, I promise. Go do what you have to do.”
“Thank you,” he said before he pressed his lips to her forehead, and then he turned and walked into the office. Eric smiled and gave them a small nod before he shut the door.