She thrashed in my arms, desperately wanting to pull away from me and it broke my heart.
“Lucas Ryder, let go of me! Let go of me this instant before I kick you where the sun don’t shine! Do you hear me? I want nothing to do with you! Now let go!”
I tried not to laugh, amused with her banter and feisty spirit. “No, not until you forgive me.”
She screamed, heaving back far enough that I had to grip her wrists. “Stop screaming.”
“Then let go of me!” she argued through gritted teeth near my face.
“Are you going to forgive me?” I replied not backing down.
“Hell. No.”
“You stubborn lil’ thang.” I jerked her forward, closer to my face and she lost her footing.
She wouldn’t stop fighting while I just held onto her, barely breaking a sweat or using any of my strength. She knew her efforts wouldn’t matter. She would never be able to overpower me and get away. I was bigger, she wouldn’t be able to go unless I wanted her to, and I knew that pissed her off more than anything.
“Stop being such a girl,” I simply stated.
Her eyes widened, gasping loudly. “Oh my God! Let go! Let go before I really hurt you. I’m not kidding, Lucas!” she yelled out directly in my face.
Thank God the beach was secluded or we definitely would have attracted a crowd. Her parents’ restaurant wasn’t far from us.
“You and what army, Alexandra.”
And then she screamed again. She screamed so damn loud you would think I was killing her. My ears felt like they were bleeding and I worried that someone would hear her and then shit would really hit the fan. If my mom knew I let her go out on my board, she would have my ass. Our parents were always grateful that she didn’t care for surfing, saying it was enough to worry about those treacherous waves and me. She was violently whipping around and screaming bloody murder, if I used any force, then I could hurt her, and I definitely didn’t want to do that. Before I gave it any thought, I did the only thing I could think of to shut her up.
I yanked her toward me.
And I kissed her.
He kissed me.
His lips touched mine.
Our mouths became one.
My eyes tightly shut, my heart stopped beating, and all the fight in me was gone. His grip moved from my wrists to my hands. Holding them. It wasn’t one of those movie kisses that we watched on TV, but it was enough to have me paralyzed from the sudden feel of his lips on mine. I had no clue what to do, so I awkwardly froze from the unexpected turn of events in the last few seconds. My mind wasn’t even wandering, it went blank as if my body wanted to live in the moment and be with him. We just stood there, neither one of us moving with our mouths glued to each other. Encased in nothing but bewilderment and something else?
Something I couldn’t put my finger on…
Something that had me weak in the knees and dizzy in the head…
Something I’d never felt before but wanted to hold onto…
We were waiting…
For what?
Who the hell knows.
As if reading my mind he pulled away first, and I quickly followed suit. Our eyes slowly opened at the exact same time and I saw something in his I’d never seen before. They were dilated, and the sapphire blues that I had become so accustomed to and loved throughout the years were gone. They were replaced with two big, black rings that held so much emotion that it was overwhelming, and yet I didn’t know what it meant. But there was also a familiarity that was still present, and it calmed the confusion that was rapidly forming in my mind. That alarmed me more than anything else. It scared me that momentarily I didn’t know the boy standing in front of me.
Still a little part of me, a small part of my heart, it soared for the first time.
I removed one of my hands from his, and lightly touched my lips. I was breathless as I swiped my fingers back and forth on the top and the bottom. They felt so different.
I felt so different.
Why?
He watched my every move with an intense glare that had me gasping for breath while trying to understand what had just happened between us. Unspoken questions ricocheted but stayed unvoiced. His stare so penetrating, so consuming that I couldn’t break it. I couldn’t move my eyes from his. They were glued together just as our lips had just been. With air slowly returning to my lungs, it restored blood flow into my unbelievably fast beating heart that I swear he could hear.
Or maybe it was his that I heard?
I watched him swallow deeply and profusely, and then his lips parted like he tried to catch air that wasn’t circulating fast enough so he needed to open his mouth to breathe. He slowly reached up and touched his own lips, repeating the same gesture he’d seen me do, mimicking me in every way. But right after he removed his fingers he did something completely different, he licked his lips.
I think my heart may have burst. It was now lying on the sand in between us for him to see, secretly hoping it was beside his. Right then and there I knew I wanted that feeling to stay forever. I wanted to bundle up whatever emotion coursed through me, and that stare that was just for me. Bring it home with me, and bottle it up, where I could cherish it and relive it whenever I wanted to. A futile hope, that for just one second I may have had an effect on him and it wasn’t an illusion.
It was real.
For a young girl…
That meant everything.
I was about to be eleven years old in a few days and I had known Lucas all my life, but it was the first time I truly felt something different, something more than just friendship for him, and I knew it was very much mutual. Even though what I felt for him, what we felt for each other, it wouldn’t be defined till a few years later. This is where it all started.
Our first kiss was our beginning and in some ways our end.
This is where our complicated love began.
“Why did you do that?” I whispered, our frenzied gazes still locked.
He shrugged. “Your eyes look funny,” he murmured, confirming my thoughts.
“So do yours,” I breathed out, swallowing the saliva that had pooled in my mouth. “Now what?”
He shrugged again.
Well if he didn’t know what to do and I didn’t know what to do?
Then what?
“Why did you kiss me?” I blurted, needing to know.
“To get you to hush up.”
“Oh.” I lowered my eyes that mirrored his. Maybe I read it all wrong.
I kicked the sand below my feet for a few seconds, neither one of us talking, but his hand grabbed mine with the other one still tightly entwined.
“Alex.”
As soon as I heard my name I raised my eyes to him. He never called me by my name. With our gazes once again connected, his eyes still dark and daunting, but a warm, loving smile now appeared on his face, making my heart skip a beat. He tucked a piece of my hair behind my ear, leaving a deep fluttering feeling in my belly.
“Are you still mad at me?”
I shook my head no, unable to find the words to express what I felt.
“Good,” was all he replied.
“I’m sorry I snapped at you,” I said, changing the subject but not dismissing the emotions that now lay between us.
“I’m sorry that shark hit my board.”
“It’s not your fault.”
He nodded. “You know I would never let anything happen to you.”
I smiled. “I know.”
“You did a really good job, though.”
“Not really,” I chuckled.
“I think you singing Brown Eyed Girl attracted that shark to come see you.”
I slanted my head to the side, my curiosity eating me up. “How do you know that?”