The sudden disappointment of a hope leaves a scar which the ultimate fulfillment of that hope never entirely removes. —Thomas Hardy
Chapter 42
On the day following their return, Claire woke late, relishing the large empty bed. After Cindy brought her coffee and food, she sat on her balcony, ate breakfast, and enjoyed the summer day, truly contented to be home. August in Iowa reminded her of Indiana, and even though the temperature and humidity continued to increase, the summer’s climax was rapidly approaching. Before long, the balminess would diminish, and evidence of autumn would materialize.
Claire intended to appreciate the remaining days of summer. She took the folder of e-mails to the pool. Knowing that Tony read them before delivering them to her, she decided to separate the ones that she felt needed responses and expedite her evening request session. Eighteen days’ worth of e-mails took quite a bit of time. She started by removing the ones that she didn’t intend to answer. Next she reread the ones from acquaintances. What did they want? Could she help in any way? If not, they went into the “Patricia, please respond” pile. If she believed there was something she could do, she put them in a pile to discuss with Tony.
Next was the pile of friends and family. It was considerably smaller. Most of them knew they were out of the country. They wanted to know about the trip and schedule a get-together. Courtney wanted to do lunch as soon as Claire recovered from her traveling. MaryAnn’s e-mail apparently went to both Tony and Claire. She invited them to a movie premiere party at their home in Malibu in October. Claire checked her calendar. It was the weekend after the Red Cross silent auction. She added those to the “discuss with Tony” pile. The last few pages were from Emily. She definitely preferred sitting in the sun, drinking iced tea at her pool, in her bathing suit, and reading Emily’s e-mails to doing it under Tony’s glare.
The first one was a note about their get-together. Emily and John enjoyed seeing them and thanked them for dinner. Apparently, John spoke to the waiter about paying the bill prior to their arrival, but somehow it never came to the table. This caused Claire to smile, she hadn’t noticed. Emily wished them a good time on their trip. She anxiously waited to hear all about it. The second came a week later. It began with, “I know you are still in Europe, but I wanted to tell you . . .” The firm set an arbitrary date of November 1. At that time, there will be a review of the associates’ production, hours billed, and fees recovered. She was optimistic about John’s final numbers. He spent every waking hour working. But cautiously she said that if he didn’t make the cut, it wasn’t the end. He would still be an associate and considered for partnership during the next review process. She asked Claire to call when she got home. The third e-mail was dated yesterday. It began, “Are you home yet?” She asked multiple questions about their trip and talked about her impending school year. Apparently, the economic state of the country was affecting the finances of her school as well as others everywhere. Even though she worked for a private school system there were severe budget cuts that would affect her classroom directly. It made Claire wonder if she could use some of her capital to make a donation. She decided to put these in the Tony pile. She wanted to call and perhaps pursue the donation.
Lunch arrived at the pool. Settling into the lounge chair with a book that made the trip to and from Europe but never opened, Claire was filled with comfort, peace, and contentment. She was home. Jet lag settled in and soon she fell into a deep sleep, sleeping through most of the afternoon. Catherine woke her at four and she went to her suite to prepare for Tony. At five o’clock, Catherine informed her that they would dine on the back patio. Her life’s routine had resumed.
August faded into September, and before she knew it October knocked on the door. Claire and Courtney were very busy finalizing their efforts for the silent auction. The donations, facility, caterers, and wine distributors all confirmed; the guest list approved and invitations mailed. Excited about the impending event, Claire felt it was her debut to the philanthropic world. Tony not only participated in this world, he excelled. She wanted Mrs. Anthony Rawlings to be equally synonymous with charity as Mr. Anthony Rawlings. It was the first time Claire informed Tony that they would be attending an event. He smiled and told her he would check their calendar.
During the auction planning her hostess duties didn’t cease. Various dinners occurred at various locations. They also attended functions and events together. Her biggest decisions involved wardrobe and hairstyle, and often those choices were made for her. That made the Red Cross function all the more important to Claire. She knew she had more to offer.
Not long before the auction Tony and Claire attended a forum in Chicago where Tony was the keynote speaker. He was asked to give a speech about success. The theme of the conference was “Risk verses Failure in the World of Business.” He never practiced his speeches or ran ideas by her. So as Claire sat next to her husband at the head table and he addressed the audience, his words were new to her too.
When she first met him, really met him, she didn’t like the business Tony. He was the one who used to visit her suite. Always professionally dressed, impersonal, methodical, detached, and other adjectives that were not as complimentary. But now she enjoyed watching and being beside Anthony Rawlings, esteemed businessman, while he shined in his element. He radiated an aura that said I am successful. By some it may be perceived as conceit. Claire probably thought of it that way at one time, but now she found it attractive. In the past, she disliked or hated his ingrained confidence and authority but now she could look at it differently. It was sexy. Watching and listening to him she comprehended the importance of her role.
Many times, following the dinner and speech the organizers would schedule a question-and-answer symposium. These were informal, with various people approaching Tony, asking him questions. Many of the attendees were young entrepreneurs looking for advice. According to Shelly, Tony’s participation was essential for public relations. According to Tony, his participation was hell. Claire’s duty included politely interrupting participants so that he could move on to the next and eventually leave.
During these Q & A sessions, multiple people approached Tony. Claire tried to appear attentive yet unobtrusive until it was time for her to interrupt. She didn’t pay attention to the individuals. They blended together in her mind. During this particular conference, a question came from one of the participants that caught them both off guard. A man younger than Tony, closer to Claire’s age, blond and blue eyed, dressed in an expensive suit, approached Tony.
“Hello, Mr. Rawlings, I am pleased to meet you. Your speech was remarkable and inspiring.” Tony shook his hand and politely thanked him, and then the blond man with big soft blue eyes continued, somewhat timidly, “I have an unusual request. May I speak with your wife for a few minutes?”
Claire hadn’t looked at the man until that moment. She was gazing into the crowd. His words made her turn, first to Tony, seeing his surprised expression, and then to the man. Her mask momentarily shattered. She recognized him immediately and suddenly wondered why she hadn’t recognized his voice. The mayhem in her head tied her tongue until Tony’s eyes brought her back to reality. Placing her hand gently on Tony’s arm, she hesitantly spoke, trying desperately for a sturdier voice.