“Excuse me, Jean, I never got my Diet Coke with lime.” Sheila favored the waitress with her brightest smile.
Jean pursed her lips, clearly annoyed that Sheila had dared to remind her. “I told the bar. I’ll check on it. And then I’m definitely going on break, so make sure you’s don’t need anything else for a few minutes.” She flashed a smile at James before she stomped away.
“So what about you?” he asked. “What was your problem?”
Sheila waved a hand. “Oh, you know, the usual. Poor impulse control, sex with strangers, blackouts.”
“Pardon? Did you say blackouts? It’s hard to hear in here.” James leaned forward, his dark eyes on hers. “I’ve never heard of that.”
“They’re hard to explain,” Sheila said, then paused.
Why was she discussing this? What was it about strangers that made it so easy to talk about personal, painful things? Was it because they had no stake in it and weren’t emotionally invested in anything that happened to you?
“It’s like I become someone else,” she finally said. “The next day, I can’t remember where I was, who he was, or what we did.” She sipped her soda, mostly ice at this point, and craned her neck to see if Jean was coming with a fresh beverage.
“Do they still happen?” His intense gaze dropped to her lips for a split second before meeting her eyes again.
She felt self-conscious. She’d wiped her mouth while eating and was painfully aware of how washed out she looked without her favorite red lipstick. Not that it should matter whether James thought she looked good or not.
“I don’t engage in those types of activities anymore,” she said.
“So you’re celibate?”
Sheila sucked in a breath at the pointed question.
Instantly his face was troubled. “I’m sorry. Much too personal. Forget I asked.”
“It’s all right.” She licked her lips, fidgeting with her paper napkin. “Let’s just say it’s complicated.”
“Isn’t it always?”
“I’ll be right back.” She stood up and reached for her purse. “Ladies’ room.”
“Sure. I’ll see if I can find out what happened to your Diet Coke.”
“I’ll bet if you sweet-talk Jean, it’ll be here by the time I get back,” Sheila said with a wink.
James laughed. “She does seem to like me, doesn’t she?”
In the restroom, Sheila washed the grease off her hands and applied a fresh coat of lipstick. The color brightened her face instantly and she felt better. On a whim, she dug into her purse and pulled out a small sample of perfume she’d picked up at the mall a few days before. She dabbed a little on her neck, then stood back, appraising herself in the bathroom’s sallow light.
What the hell was she doing putting on perfume?
She knew she could go home with James if she wanted to. Two sex addicts meeting at a bar? It was a no-brainer.
The question was, did she want to?
Back at the table a minute later, she saw that her plate was gone and a fresh Diet Coke-with a perfect wedge of lime-was sitting in its place, condensation covering the sides of the glass like sweat.
“Magic,” James said with a grin.
“Finally.” She slid into her chair. “Thank you.”
“You won’t believe what I had to do to get her to bring it.”
“I don’t think I want to know.” Sheila laughed and took a long sip, feeling his eyes on her once again. She was beginning to like it. Christ. She sipped her soda again to avoid meeting his gaze.
“So, do you have a sponsor?” he asked, picking up where they’d left off.
“I have a therapist.”
“Are you dating anyone?”
His question came out of left field and she felt her eyes widen. He laughed at her reaction. “I’m not asking for me. It’s the sex-addiction issue. I’m wondering if it’s really possible for any of us to have normal relationships.”
She relaxed, but she couldn’t ignore the twinge of disappointment that he hadn’t asked for himself. “I’m engaged, actually.”
The words embarrassed her for some reason. She couldn’t bring herself to add that the wedding was in a little over a week.
“Is that right?” He looked surprised. “Congratulations.”
Was it her imagination, or did he also seem disappointed? She couldn’t be sure. She smiled, but it felt forced as thoughts of Morris clouded her mind. “All the plans are made. I just have to get my dress fitted one last time.” She rubbed her temple. Her head was feeling a bit heavy, no doubt from the greasy burger and fries she’d just eaten. “It’s not a big wedding, but I want to look good. I probably shouldn’t have eaten here tonight.”
“I’m sure your fiancé thinks you look beautiful no matter what.” James’s dark eyes bored into hers. “You’re a gorgeous woman. He’s a lucky man.”
She took another long sip of soda, suddenly feeling as if she needed the caffeine. “I’m the one who’s lucky.”
She pictured Morris’s face. He was on a plane to Japan now and she wondered if he’d made any decisions. Her heart panged thinking about him.
A yawn escaped her lips before she could put a hand over her mouth. Aghast, she took another sip of her soda. “Yikes,” she said to James, who was watching her intently. “Guess it’s been a long day.”
“Don’t apologize.” He favored her with a charming smile. “I’m beat myself. Maybe you should get going before you get too sleepy to drive. How far do you have to go?”
“I live in Seattle. Capitol Hill.”
“So, thirty minutes?” James said. “That’s a long drive if you’re tired. I’ll ask our friend Jean for the checks.”
“Ha. Your friend Jean.”
He waved and the waitress came over quickly with their bills. Sheila noticed a little happy face was drawn on James’s ticket, and that Jean’s large, gnarled hand rested on his arm a little longer than necessary. If it bothered him, he didn’t show it.
“I should get going, too.” He put some cash on the table and stood up. “Early day tomorrow.”
They left the tavern together. The waitress looked disappointed as they passed. So did the two loud women at the bar. Sheila allowed herself a small smile. They all probably thought she was leaving with James.
It wasn’t a terrible thought.
The night air was crisp and refreshing, but it didn’t do much to clear Sheila’s sudden brain fog. She yawned again as she approached her white Volvo, staggering a little as she tried to fish out her keys. Despite the brightly lit parking lot, her vision was going blurry.
“God, I’m so exhausted all of a sudden.” She rooted around in her purse with a hand that felt like rubber. Her eyelids were heavy and she blinked rapidly a few times to try to wake herself up. Where the hell were her car keys? “That burger really did a number on me. I might have to go back inside for some coffee to go.”
“You’ll be up all night if you do that,” he said.
“Where are you parked? Don’t wait for me…” The words came out slurred. She blinked again, feeling dizzy, and put a hand on the car to steady herself.
“I’m just a few spots down.” He pointed to a large black SUV and then looked back at Sheila with concern. She began to feel embarrassed despite her fatigue. “Maybe I should give you a lift home. It’s on the way.”
“No, no.” She lifted a hand that weighed fifty pounds. “I’ll be fine.” Holy shit, I can’t be this tired…
It was her last thought as her head rushed to meet pavement.
CHAPTER 14
E than’s hand rested casually on Sheila’s denim-clad thigh, a small smile on his face as he headed back to Lake Stevens. This was the first time they’d been in a car together. It might have passed for a date had she not been unconscious.
The radio was tuned to a classic-rock station and the Rolling Stones “Sympathy for the Devil” was booming out of the loudspeakers. Sheila had once told him about the summer she and her girlfriends drove cross-country to catch the opening of the Stones’ American tour. The story included a car breakdown, hitchhiking, some bad pot, and a zany stop at a truckers-only diner. She’d barely been out of her teens. He wished he could have known her then.