Shifting closer, he picked a strand of hair off my shoulder and wrapped the thick curl around his finger. I froze. “And you misinterpreted what you saw. Her gift… well, you know it’s been getting to her. I was draining some of it so she wasn’t feeling everything. I’ve done it for years.”
“But you guys were so close…”
“Yeah, but it wasn’t what you thought.” His lips formed a crooked smile. “She’s not the one I want to be close to.”
I sucked in a deep breath. Confused, I pressed my hands against his stomach. I wanted him… to touch me like he had in the cabin, but he’d said it was hard to even be friends with me. How was this making it easier? But I couldn’t—didn’t want to stop him. Hayden’s warm breath danced over my cheek and his eyes held a lot of depth. I thought I could probably get lost in them if I wanted to.
“And it’s been hard being just friends with you when I want to be more than that. Seeing you every day, wanting to touch you…” He stopped, looking thoughtful.
“What are you thinking?” I breathed.
“Well,” he drawled. “I’m thinking something really crazy right now.”
“What?” I moved my lips closer to his. I’m not even sure if I was aware of doing it.
“I’m thinking about kissing you,” he said, “and touching you. It’s all I can think about. It’s why it’s been so hard being around you.”
My heart jumped in my chest, and then sped up erratically. The thick tension hit a new all-time high.
Surprisingly, I found that I still had the ability to speak. “That’s really crazy.”
“Yeah.” He dropped my hair. “Crazy stuff.”
“You should really think about something else,” I advised, even as I moved my hand up the front of his shirt, stopping over his heart.
Hayden placed his hand on the small of my back. That touch wiped away the logical part of my brain.
“What are you thinking about?”
He was close, way too close. The scent of soap and spice filled my senses. I let my eyes drift shut.
“Kissing you,” I admitted in a low voice.
“I wish you hadn’t said that,” he said, unbelievably still.
“I know, but you started it.” I took a deep breath and opened my eyes. “We shouldn’t do this. I don’t know if I can.”
“You didn’t kill the plant, Ember.”
“But that’s just a plant. It’s different. I can’t—” Hayden kissed me.
Chapter 24
His lips barely brushed mine, as if he wanted to test out what would happen. I didn’t dare move.
Because nothing happened, he pressed forward. Gentle and soft, then hard and hungry as the kiss deepened.
My world exploded.
Little shivers of pleasure and panic shot through me. I needed to stop, but I couldn’t pull myself away, couldn’t focus on anything other than how wonderful his lips felt against mine.
And when he pressed me onto my back, I was lost in this madness. Any memories of kissing were blown away. My body sparked alive; my heart swelled and thundered. Blood flowed to every part of me.
A fine tremor shifted through Hayden, but he kept kissing me. His hand slipped to my shoulder, slid down to my hip. I wasn’t thinking anymore, just acting. My hand crept from his chest to the back of his neck. I pulled him closer.
He made a strangled sort of sound against my mouth and jerked. A heart-stopping second, and then all the strategic parts of our bodies met, and whatever control I had left snapped. Both of his hands had dropped to my hips and I wrapped my legs around him. My pulsed pounded and my skin burned, but I didn’t mind.
Twenty seconds of kissing, of touching, maybe a little more.
Then it happened.
Hayden tore his lips from mine and reared back, breaking my hold. Veins bulged and pulsed on the exposed expanse of his neck.
“Hayden…?” My breath came out in short gasps.
He shook his head and rested his hands on his knees. “I just… need a minute, okay?”
I nodded and wrapped my arms around myself. The poison in my touch still had gotten to him. Plants were one thing, but humans must still be up in the air. Then something else struck me. “Why didn’t you drain my touch?”
His hands unclenched. “I won’t do that…. again.”
“Dammit, Hayden. I could’ve killed you!” I came to my knees in front of him. “God, I’m… sorry. I shouldn’t have let you do that.”
“No. Don’t be sorry. I’m not. We… we just have to be… more careful.”
“You want to kiss me again? After that?”
“Yeah, I want to do it again. This… all of this is progress.” He stopped, a small smile spreading across his face. “Maybe I could. I mean, it took a while for your touch to kick in. And you didn’t kill the plant.”
“Well, I could concentrate then.”
Hayden laughed softly. “Maybe one day you’ll be able to.”
Concentrating on anything other than kissing him while, well, kissing him, didn’t seem likely.
“Anyway,” he said, grabbing my arms and pulling me right up against him, chest to chest. “For now, we’ll just work around it.”
Before I could even ask what that meant, Hayden kissed me again. This time he pulled back every couple of seconds, leaving me breathless. Soon, I realized he was timing the kisses, pulling away before my touch kicked in. He exhibited far more control than anyone, including himself, ever gave him credit for.
Hayden sat back, pulling me into his lap. “This is working.”
I looped my arms around his neck, careful to not touch his skin. “Mmm-hmm.”
He chuckled deep in his throat, and then put his mouth on mine again. He pushed it to the limit, stopping only after the first tremor racked his body, and God, it was like sweet torture. Just when I thought I’d come right out of my skin, he’d pull back, breathing just as heavily as me.
“Em, do you know how long I’ve wanted to be this close to you—to kiss you?” His voice was rough, thick.
I pressed my cheek against his chest, inhaling his scent. “As long as I have?”
“Longer,” he murmured, working his fingers into my hair and tipping my head back. “You’re so beautiful to me.”
“Beautiful?”
“Yes,” he said so seriously. “Your lips, your cheeks, your eyes… I find everything about you beautiful. Your strength, the way you care for your sister…” His gaze dropped, and I shivered. “I admire your control. Your willpower. Everything. I wouldn’t change a thing about you.”
My heart seemed to take over everything. I crushed my mouth to his, immersed in the thrill of his lips against mine. I don’t know how long we did this or how many different places his lips touched before he’d pull away, take a moment, and then start all over. I felt feverish, alive, and… and something far, far stronger than anything I’d ever felt in my life.
Sometime later, I was wrapped in the bed sheet and Hayden lay beside me, that clever mind of his finding a way to hold me without really touching. He stayed above the covers, one arm and leg thrown over me. Every so often, he’d brush my hair back and I’d snuggle in closer.
“Ember?”
Tipping my head back, I opened my eyes so I could see him. He looked terribly serious. “What?”
“I really am sorry for not believing you,” he said quietly. “I won’t doubt you again.”
“It’s all right. It’s over now.” But it really wasn’t over. Phoebe may’ve been responsible for the stuff in the locker, but she hadn’t been behind the accident that started all of this. But right now, curled up in the closest thing to being in Hayden’s arms, I didn’t want to think about that.