Yesterday he called me in and asked me if I would like him to tell me another Jewish parable. He told me about some Reb Zusya who had to pay a debt by the morning and did not have the money. His disciples were in a panic as to how to get it, but the rebbe was calm. He took a sheet of paper and wrote down 25 ways in which the money might arrive, and on another he wrote a twenty-sixth. The next morning the money arrived from somewhere. The disciples read through the list of 25 ways but did not find the means by which the money had actually come. Then Reb Zusya unfolded the other piece of paper on which was written, “God does not need the advice of Reb Zusya.”
I laughed of course, but two days before the council’s deadline, a group of American Protestants came to visit us who have a great liking for Israel, and their pastor wrote us a check for $5,000. That will pay the rent for a year!
In my heart I had already said good-bye to our young orchard and grieved for the people for whom we are responsible and would now have to turn out on to the street. Then everything turned out as it has.
Lots of love, Mama. Write and tell me about everybody, as neither Axel nor Michael have written a word.
Hilda
15. 1972, Haifa
L
ETTER FROM
K
ASIA
C
OHEN, PARISHIONER OF THE
C
HURCH OF
E
LIJAH AT THE
S
PRING, TO HER HUSBAND,
E
THAN, IN THE
U
NITED
S
TATES
Dear Ethan,
I’ve been meaning to write to you for a month about something very bad which has happened here. I have been so worried that I couldn’t write. It was just so unwise of us to not all go together. We should have gone together. We could have gotten by somehow. If you didn’t manage to earn enough for us to buy an apartment, we could have carried on living in our little … Anyway, now Dina is pregnant. I am horrified. She is 15, what a foolish girl! It is already five months and I’ve only just noticed. To tell the truth, it was not even me, it was our landlady Shifra who noticed. She hinted, but even then I did not get it straight away. It was only in the evening the penny dropped. It’s true. Dina is not saying who got her pregnant. Either she is pretending nothing has happened or she really does not see she has ruined her life. I can’t even say she has been behaving especially badly. She’s a girl like any other, going to school, not staying out late, coming home at the right time. What was I missing? I have been in a complete panic all month. You are not here. I don’t want to tell my friends, especially Melba. Even before this she was always telling me how badly I am bringing up my daughter.
Last week I went to see Daniel. He made time for me and I told him everything I knew. “What should I do?” I asked. “I’m even afraid to tell my husband about it.”
Daniel said, “That’s all right. He is not half as stupid as you. He’ll be upset for five minutes and then pleased that a human being is being born. You are still so young, and you will have a grandson! How I envy you. For my whole life when I look at babies I feel so jealous of those who have brought them into the world. Those little hands and fingers, their little ears. You should be pleased, you silly woman! Tell Hilda to collect all that the baby will need. She has an exchange scheme where mothers swap children’s things, cots, prams … Is Dina pleased?” I told him she just seems vacant, as if nothing has happened, and won’t tell me who the father is.
“Well, she is embarrassed,” he says. “It’s probably some little kid as young as she is herself. Take her out of school or the other children will be unkind to her and we can do without that. She will have the baby, leave it in your lap, and go back to school. She is a clever girl. She mustn’t see this as a misfortune. It is a great happiness. Do you want everything to go by the timetable? From all I know about women, those who are unable to have babies see it as a real misfortune. I congratulate you, Kasia. Tell Dina she should come to Mass. Everybody here likes her, they will not be unkind. Go away, go away! I’m very busy today. You can see how many books I have to read.”
I came home, and Dina had a little boy with cauliflower ears visiting. Rudi Bruk, who looks to be about twelve. He’s half a head shorter than her but the cleverest boy in her class. I arrived and he immediately headed for the door.
“Well,” I asked, “where are you running off to?”
“I promised to be home by 9:00, and it’s already 10:30. My mum will be worried.” At that I burst out laughing, through my tears. “Well why didn’t you go home earlier,” I asked, “so as not to be late?”
“Because Dina was frightened of being on her own. I was waiting for you.” I really wanted to kick him, but he has such a slender neck and Dina was staring at me wide-eyed, like a wild cat. I thought, Lord, don’t tell me she is in love with him.
Ethan, my dear, now I’ve told you everything. Everything would have been different if we had gone to the States together, but because of my greed this has happened. I thought we couldn’t live here without an apartment and you might not be able to make enough. Now you will come with money, we will buy a three-room apartment, and it will still be too small for us. I kiss you, my dear. I miss you very much. I was wrong not to come with you. I can’t wait to see you. There are only four months left. By the time you get here, we will have a grandson. For some reason I think it will be a boy. He could have been ours.
Dina does not want to write to you. She is ashamed and scared. She respects you far more than me, and does not want you to see her belly. Oy, do you know the thought I had? We could have had the baby here and moved to another town and told everybody it was mine. You and I could have adopted him, but in view of the fact you have not been here for a full year, our friends would all think I had been on the razzle! Which version do you prefer? Both are worst!
I kiss you again,
Kasia
16. 1973, Haifa
L
ETTER FROM
D
ANIEL
S
TEIN TO
E
MMANUEL
L
EROUX IN
T
OULOUSE
Dear Brother Emmanuel,
You may remember we met briefly in Toulouse at the conference of our Order in 1969. If my memory does not deceive me, you said that when you entered the Order, you continued to work as a brain surgeon in a children’s neurological clinic. I have a woman in my congregation whose 15-year-old daughter has given birth to a baby with hydrocephalus. The child is now six months old and the doctors observing it here say there is an operation which could halt the progress of the illness. They say it is not available in Israel but that there are specialists in France. I remembered you and decided to ask whether you might be able to find out where in France such an operation might be performed, and perhaps organize a consultation for the baby.
The girl who is the mother of this unfortunate child is herself still a child and is deeply traumatized. I will be grateful for any information you can give me in this matter. I would also like to know how much such an operation might cost. The family of the sick boy is in dire circumstances, so we shall need to busy ourselves with raising the money.
With love,
Brother D. Stein
17. 1973, Toulouse
L
ETTER FROM
E
MMANUEL
L
EROUX TO
D
ANIEL
S
TEIN
Dear Brother,
Your letter has found its way into the right hands because it is at our clinic that the method of performing this operation was devised. It is a fairly complex operation performed on very young children. The results are good but much depends on the stage the illness has reached. There can be cases where we are no longer able to help. Please send the results of the child’s tests and then we will be able to decide whether it would make sense for him to come. We will discuss financial matters later, when it is clear whether surgical intervention is possible. Our clinic attracts charitable donations and that might significantly reduce the family’s expenses. Here in Toulouse we will at least accommodate them in our charitable center or with our parishioners, which will avoid the expense of a hotel.