Paul flashed a grin at his brother-in-law. «Don't worry, he didn't notice you were sharpening your knife for his benefit. I told you, in social situations he doesn't have a clue.» He burst out laughing when Rafael looked disappointed. «I noticed, and so did Skyler and Josh. We all thought it was very scary.»
«You don't sound convincing,» Rafael grumbled.
Colby laughed softly. «You should be happy you didn't scare the boy.»
«I want to meet him,» Paul said abruptly, as if he'd just managed to screw up his courage. «If Gary Jansen is my uncle, I want to meet him.»
«We don't know that he is. Lots of people have the same last name,» Colby pointed out, the smile fading from her face. Instinctively, she moved closer to Rafael, her body brushing up against his.
«But it's likely, Colby. This is a small community of people. He's part of it. Quite a few of the women here seem to have jaguar blood. Maybe he does too and that's what drew him in the first place.»
Rafael rubbed her arm in a comforting gesture. «Maybe. All right. Give me a little time to finish things here first,» Colby said.
Suddenly, her kitchen was too small. She needed the open range and a good horse to ride. Her mother had always feared jaguar blood, feared producing a male child. Jaguar males weren't always the nicest of men, and Colby didn't want Paul exposed to any more danger-or rejection. And she certainly didn't want anyone influencing him in the wrong direction. Raising children was definitely not easy.
Paul leaned over to kiss her cheek, then sauntered out of the room, calling for Josef and Ginny.
«You can't protect him forever,» Rafael said gently. He wrapped his arms around her, nuzzling the top of her head with his chin.
«You say that, but you try to protect me-and Ginny. I just don't want him hurt anymore. I see it in his eyes sometimes. He wouldn't let you or Nicolas take his memories, and he remembers how the vampire took him over and used him to try to kill me. I know he still has nightmares about it. I just want him to be happy, Rafael. He's such a great kid.»
He tipped her face up to his. «He is a great kid and he's going to be fine. We'll look after him together.»
Her gaze slid away from his. «I couldn't bear to tell him the truth about me, about Razvan. I thought this would be such a good idea, coming here, meeting everyone, but now, I'm not so sure. Someone is bound to tell him who my birth father was.»
«Do you think your brother would care about that?» Rafael scowled at her. «Paul loves you for who you are, not who your father was.»
«You don't understand. He's asking about his past for a reason, and once he starts delving into it, he'll find out about me. I couldn't take it if he rejected me too. And how could I ever blame him? He's had so much to contend with because of me. If Mom hadn't had me, Paul and Ginny would have been accepted by the Chevez family and raised on the ranch in South America. He would never have been exposed to a vampire. Now he knows about the jaguar blood and once he finds out it isn't always so cool, he won't be happy about that
either. And someone is going to tell him about Razvan.» She shuddered, looked around and lowered her voice when she said the name. «I can hardly face any of these people, let alone have Paul and Ginny find out that such a terrible man is my father.»
Rafael's hand came up to burrow his fingers in her hair. «You are his victim just as his sister was. Do not be ashamed of who your father was. You bear the mark of the Dragonseeker, and that is an unbelievable boon. The Dragonseeker clan is one of the most revered of all Carpathian lineages and it is your line. I hope that each of our children bears that mark. You should be proud of it, not ashamed.»
«My father came from the same lineage and he tried to assassinate the prince,"' she pointed out. «He betrayed Natalya, his twin sister. He has children-like me-scattered across the world, and he intended to use us like blood banks. I have family I've never met, all victims of this man. His blood runs in my veins. Do you really think I want Paul-or anyone else-to know I'm related to him?»
Rafael gathered her closer to him. «I know you're related to him. Carpathian males perhaps have more understanding than most for those who become wholly evil. It is a path we all go down, and some touch a little closer than others. Before you came into my life, Colby, I could not always tell the difference between good and evil.»
«Razvan nearly killed the prince,» she repeated. «He took blood from little girls. It was why he got my mother pregnant in the first place-in order to use my blood to sustain his life.»
Rafael could hear the horror in her voice. Colby still had trouble accepting the evil in their world, and he loved her all the more for her innocence. He took her hand and tugged, pulling her from the openness of the kitchen to the stairs leading to the privacy of their chamber belowground.
«We can't leave the children,» Colby protested.
«You're always so responsible. I've directed Paul to be a good host. You need a few minutes without all the noise.»
«I need our ranch. Wouldn't you love to go horseback riding in all this snow?»
«Is that what you'd like to do?»
She shook her head. «We don't have time. The dinner is in just a little while. And we're supposed to be entertaining the kids.»
He reversed direction. «If you want to go riding…»
«It's snowing, silly.» There was a wealth of love in her voice. Rafael, for all his domineering ways, always tried to give her whatever would make her happy. «And horses don't see that well at night.»
He laughed softly and leaned down to place his lips against her ear. «I am Carpathian, pequena, and I can provide whatever you want. Come with me.»
Colby went because she could never resist Rafael or the way his black eyes burned with such hunger for her. As she stepped outside, he wrapped her in a fur-lined full-length hooded coat and boots. Just outside the walkway, standing by the porch, a horse sidestepped, tossing its head, eager to be running. The animal was at least seventeen hands, with hooves made to run in the snow. Rafael swung onto its bare back and reached his arm down to her.
«This is a night rider, Colby, and he loves to run.»
She took his arm, allowing him to swing her up in front of him. «Go fast, Rafael, I want to fly across the ground tonight.»
His arms caged her in and he bent his body protectively over hers, whispering a command to the snorting animal. The horse took off, powerful muscles bunching as he leapt forward. After the first explosive burst of speed, the horse's gait settled into a rhythmic gallop and they raced flat out across the open meadow. Snow hit their faces and the wind whistled past them. Clouds spun overhead and it should have been dark, but the snow made the world a bright, sparkling dream of a place.
«This land is breathtaking,» Colby said. «Do you miss it?»
«At first, all of us did, but we've been so long where we are that the rain forest and the heat and humidity are our home. This is beautiful and wonderful to visit, but it no longer feels like home to me.»
Colby turned her face up to the night sky. Rafael loved the rain forest, but he would have given it up-given up living with his brothers on their ranch-had she wanted to stay in the United States. Though she hadn't believed it when Rafael first claimed her, now, knowing his every thought, she realized just how much power she wielded when it came to her lifemate.
He gave her total acceptance and unconditional love. She pressed back against him allowing the rhythm of the horse to soothe her.
The animal knew his way, and twice leapt effortlessly over fallen logs and splashed through a small creek bed. He slowed when they were near the woods and hills, where she could see the ferns and shrubbery poking through several drifts of snow.