“How will I ever find the strength to leave you?” she murmured softly, painfully.
His eyes darkened dangerously. Mikhail rolled over, felt how uncomfortable she was with her nudity, and dragged a blanket around her. Raven sat up, pushed the heavy fall of hair from her face with that curiously innocent, sexy gesture of hers that he loved. Her blue eyes were frankly wary.
“You will not leave me, Raven.” His voice was much harsher than he intended. With great effort, he forced himself to gentle it. She was young and vulnerable; he had to remember that above all else. She had no idea what the cost of separation would be to either of them. “How can you share what we have and just walk away?”
“You know why. Don’t pretend you don’t. I feel things, sense them. This is all too bizarre for me. I don’t know the laws in this country, but when someone is murdered, the law and the press are notified. That’s just one thing, Mikhail; we won’t even get into the things you’re capable of doing—nearly strangling’ Jacob, for heaven’s sake. You’re way out of my league and we both know it.” She pulled the blanket closer around her shoulders. “I want you, I can’t even think about being without you, but I’m not certain what is going on here.”
His hand stroked down the length of her hair in a disturbing caress, his fingers moving through silken strands to wisp down her back to the base of her bare spine. His touch melted her insides, curled her toes. Raven closed her eyes, laid her head on her knees. She was no match for him in any way.
Mikhail shifted his hand to her nape, his fingers soothing. “We are already committed to one another. Can you not feel it, Raven?” He whispered the words, a husky blend of warmth and sensuality. He knew he was fighting her instincts, her innate sense of self-preservation. He chose his words carefully. “You know who I am, what is inside me. If distance separated us, you would still need to feel my hands on you, my mouth on yours, my body in yours, a part of yours.”
Just his words alone warmed her blood, fed the ache deep inside. Raven covered her face, ashamed that she had such need of what amounted to a total stranger. “I’m going home, Mikhail. I’m so wrapped up in you, I’m doing things I never thought possible.” It wasn’t only physicaclass="underline" She wished it were. She didn’t want to feel his loneliness, his greatness, his incredible will and drive to keep those he led safe from harm. But she did feel it. She could feel his heart, his soul, his mind. She had talked to him without speaking aloud, she had shared his mind. She knew he was in her.
His arm curved around her shoulders, drew her huddled form beside him. To comfort or to restrain? Raven swallowed the burning tears. There were sounds pouring into her head, rustlings, creaks. She put her hands over her ears to shut them out. “What’s happening to me, Mikhail? What did we do that’s changed me like this?”
“You are my life, my mate, the half of myself that was missing.” His hand returned to stroking her hair with infinite gentleness. “My people mate for life. I am a true Carpathian; I am of the earth. We have special gifts.”
She turned her head, regarding him with enormous blue eyes. “Telepathic ability. Yours is very strong, much stronger than mine. And so developed. It amazes me, the things you can do.”
“The price for these gifts is high, little one. We are cursed with the need for one mate, a sharing of souls. Once this occurs—and the ritual can be brutal to an innocent woman—we cannot live apart from our mates. Our children are few; we lose many in the first year and most of those born are male. We are both blessed and cursed with longevity. For those of us who are happy, a long life is a blessing; for someone alone and tormented, it is a curse. It is one long eternity of darkness, a barren, stark existence.”
Mikhail cupped her chin in the palm of his hand, tipped her chin up so that she could not escape his dark, hungry eyes. He took a deep breath, let it out. “We did not have sex, little one; we did not make love. Ours was as close to a true Carpathian mating ritual as is possible without your, being of our blood. If you leave me... “ His voice trailed off, and he shook his head. He needed to bind her to him irrevocably. The words were in his mind, his heart. The beast raged to say them. She would never escape, yet he could not do that to her, say the words to a mortal. He had no idea what would happen to her.
The spot over her left breast ached, throbbed, even burned. Raven looked down, saw the dark evidence of his brand, touched it with her fingertips. She remembered the feel of his teeth pinning her to the floor, his strength, the warning growl rumbling in his throat like that of an animal. He had taken her body as if it belonged to him, wildly, a little brutally, yet something in her had responded to the ferocious hunger and need in him. At the same time, he had been tender, insuring her pleasure before his own, so careful of her size and the frailty of her small bones. The mixture of his tenderness and wild nature was so impossible to resist, Raven knew no other man could ever touch her as he had. There would only be Mikhail for her.
“Are you telling me you’re of another race, Mikhail?” She was striving to put it all together.
“We believe that we are of another species. We are different. We hide it well—we have to—but we can hear things humans cannot. We speak to the animals, share our minds as well as our bodies and hearts. Understand, this information in the wrong hands would doom us all. My life is literally in your hands.” Inmore ways than one.
She caught the echo of his thought before he could censor it. “Would you have stopped if I had panicked?”
He closed his eyes, ashamed. “I would like to lie to you, but I will not. I would have soothed you, made certain you could accept me.”
“Commanded me?”
“No!” He denied that vehemently. He would not have gone that far. He was certain of that. He believed absolutely that he could have persuaded her to accept him.
“These gifts.” She rubbed her chin across her knees. “You are stronger physically than any human I’ve ever met. And that leap in the library—you reminded me of a great jungle cat—is that part of your heritage, too?”
“Yes.” His hand tangled in her hair again, brought a fistful up to bury his face in it, breathing her in. His scent lingered on her, would remain in her. A trace of satisfaction touched his fathomless eyes.
“You bit me.” She touched first her neck, then her breast. A sweet, hot ache filled her at the memory of him wild in her arms, his body frenzied with need, his mind a turbulent, red desire, his mouth working eagerly, hungrily at her.
What was wrong with her that she wanted more?She had heard of women so enthralled by sex that they were virtual slaves. Was that what was happening to her? She flung up a hand as if to ward him off. “Mikhail, this is so fast. I can’t fall in love in a couple of days, decide my life in a few minutes. I don’t know you; I’m even a little bit afraid of you, of what you are, the power you wield.”
“You said you trusted me.”
“I do. That’s what makes me so crazy. Can’t you see that? We’re so different. You do crazy things, yet I want to be with you, hear your laughter, argue with you. I want to see your smile, the way your eyes light up, the hunger and need in you when you look at me. I want to take that coldness from your eyes, the distant, faraway stare when your mouth hardens and you look cruel and ruthless. Yes, I trust you, but I have no reason to.”
“You are very pale. How do you feel?” He wanted to tell her it was too late, that they had gone too far, but he knew it would only build her resistance and alarm her needlessly.
“Funny, sort of sick to my stomach, like I should eat something, but the thought of food makes me ill. You gave me one of your herb concoctions, didn’t you?”