"Made him vampire," Bill explained. "But that was a mistake. He's never been the same from what my friends tell me. He's as smart as a tree trunk, so to make a living he does odd jobs for the rest of us. We can't have him out in public, you can see that."
I nodded, my mouth hanging open. Of course not. "Geez," I murmured, stunned at the royalty in my yard.
"So remember how stupid he is, and how impulsive ... don't spend time alone with him, and don't ever call him anything but Bubba. Also, he likes pets, as he told you, and a diet of their blood hasn't made him any the more reliable. Now, as to why I brought him here ..."
I stood with my arms across my chest, waiting for Bill's explanation with some interest.
"Sweetheart, I have to go out of town for a while," Bill said.
The unexpectedness of this completely disconcerted me.
"What... why? No, wait. I don't need to know." I waved my hands in front of me, shooing away any implication that Bill was obligated to tell me his business.
"I'll tell you when I get back," he said firmly.
"So where does your friend—Bubba—come in?" Though I had a nasty feeling I already knew.
"Bubba is going to watch you while I'm gone," Bill said stiffly.
I raised my eyebrows.
"All right. He's not long on..." Bill cast around. "... anything," he finally admitted. "But he's strong, and he'll do what I tell him, and he'll make sure no one breaks into your house."
"He'll stay out in the woods?"
"Oh, yes," Bill said emphatically. "He's not even supposed to come up and speak to you. At dark, he'll just find a place from which he can see the house, and he'll watch all night."
I'd have to remember to close my blinds. The idea of the dim vampire peering in my windows was not edifying.
"You really think this is necessary?" I asked helplessly. "You know, I don't remember you asking me."
Bill sort of heaved, his version of taking a deep breath. "Sweetheart," he began in an overly patient voice, "I am trying very hard to get used to the way women want to be treated now. But it isn't natural to me, especially when I fear you are in danger. I'm trying to give myself peace of mind while I'm gone. I wish I didn't have to go, and it isn't what I want to do, but what I have to do, for us."
I eyed him. "I hear you," I said finally. "I'm not crazy about this, but I am afraid at night, and I guess ... well, okay."
Frankly, I don't think it mattered a damn whether I consented or not. After all, how could I make Bubba leave if he didn't want to go? Even the law enforcement people in our little town didn't have the equipment to deal with vampires, and if they were faced with this particular vampire, they'd just stand and gape for long enough for him to tear them apart. I appreciated Bill's concern, and I figured I better have the good grace to thank him. I gave him a little hug.
"Well, if you have to go off, you just be careful while you're gone," I said, trying not to sound forlorn. "Do you have a place to stay?"
"Yes. I'll be in New Orleans. There was a room open at the Blood in the Quarter."
I'd read an article about this hotel, the first in the world that catered exclusively to vampires. It promised complete security, and so far it had delivered. It was right smack dab in the middle of the French Quarter, too. And at dusk it was absolutely surrounded by fang-bangers and tourists waiting for the vampires to come out.
I began to feel envious. Trying not to look like a wistful puppy who's being pushed back in the door when its owners leave, I yanked my smile back into place. "Well, you have a good time," I said brightly. "Got your packing done? The drive should take a few hours, and it's already dark."
"The car is ready." I understood for the first time that he had delayed leaving to spend time with me and Arlene's kids. "I had better leave." He hesitated, seemed to be searching for the right words. Then he held out his hands to me. I took them, and he pulled a little, just exerted a tiny pressure. I moved into his embrace. I rubbed my face against his shirt. My arms circled him, pressed him into me.
"I'll miss you," he said. His voice was just a breath in the air, but I heard him. I felt him kiss the top of my head, and then he stepped away from me and out the front door. I heard his voice on the front porch as he gave Bubba some last minute directions, and I heard the squeak of the swing as Bubba got up.
I didn't look out the window until I heard Bill's car going down the driveway. Then I saw Bubba sauntering into the woods. I told myself, as I took my shower, that Bill must trust Bubba since he'd left him guarding me. But I still wasn't sure who I was more afraid of: the murderer Bubba was watching for, or Bubba himself.
WORK THE next day, Arlene asked me why the vampire had been at my house. I wasn't surprised that she'd brought it up.
"Well, Bill had to go out of town, and he worries, you know ..." I was hoping to let it drop at that. But Charlsie had drifted up (we weren't at all busy: the Chamber of Commerce was having a lunch and speaker at Fins and Hooves, and the Ladies' Prayers and Potatoes group were topping their baked potatoes at old Mrs. Bellefleur's huge house).
"You mean," Charlsie said with starry eyes, "that your man got you a personal bodyguard?" I nodded reluctantly. You could put it that way. "That's so romantic," Charlsie sighed. You could look at it that way.
"But you should see him," Arlene told Charlsie, having held her tongue as long as she could. "He's exactly like—!"
"Oh, no, not when you talk to him," I interrupted. "He's not at all the same." That was true. "And he really doesn't like it when he hears that name."
"Oh," said Arlene in a hushed voice, as if Bubba could be listening in the broad daylight.
"I do feel safer with Bubba in the woods," I said, which was more or less true.
"Oh, he doesn't stay in the house?" Charlsie asked, clearly a little disappointed.
"God, no!" I said, then mentally apologized to God for taking his name in vain. I was having to do that a lot lately. "No, Bubba stays in the woods at night, watching the house." "Was that true about the cats?" Arlene looked squeamish. "He was just joking. Not a great sense of humor, huh?" I was lying through my teeth. I certainly believed Bubba enjoyed a snack of cat blood.
Arlene shook her head, unconvinced. It was time to change the subject. "Did you and Rene have fun on your evening out?" I asked.
"Rene was so good last night, wasn't he?" she said, her cheeks pink.
A much-married woman, blushing. "You tell me." Arlene enjoyed a little ribald teasing.
"Oh, you! What I mean, he was real polite to Bill and even that Bubba."
"Any reason why he wouldn't be?"
"He has kind of a problem with vampires, Sookie." Arlene shook her head. "I know, I do, too," she confessed when I looked at her with raised eyebrows. "But Rene really has some, prejudice. Cindy dated a vampire for a while, and that just made Rene awful upset."
"Cindy okay?" I had a great interest in the health of someone who'd dated a vamp.
"I haven't seen her," Arlene admitted, "but Rene goes to visit every other week or so. She's doing well, she's back on the right track. She has a job in a hospital cafeteria."
Sam, who'd been standing behind the bar loading the refrigerator with bottled blood, said, "Maybe Cindy would like to move back home. Lindsey Krause quit the other shift because she's moving to Little Rock."