“What?”
“If Laurel crosses over again and tries to contact you, you need to be strong enough to handle that.”
“Then… last night? It was real?” She had not been imagining it. Laurel’s ghost had been trying to talk to her. “Fuck! I completely blew it.”
“Quit being so hard on yourself. It’s not an easy thing to deal with, and you had other issues.”
Jackie turned away. “You must think I’m a total nut job.”
“Hardly,” she reassured her, “but now is not the time to rehash old shit. That’s what therapists are for. The question is will you be able to handle seeing Laurel again when she shows up?”
The thought both exhilarated and terrified her. “You think she will?”
Shelby gave her a confident smile. “Oh, I think it’s a matter of when, not if.”
God! What the hell would she say? Sorry about the whole “not saving you” thing? Great to see you, and really sorry you’re dead? I wish it had been me? “I don’t know if I could talk to her without turning into a blubbering idiot.”
“Blubbering idiot is fine,” Shelby said and chuckled. “Just don’t pass out or run screaming in the other direction.”
“I’ll really see her again?” Jackie could hardly believe the possibility.
“Almost guaranteed, but it could be anytime or anywhere. I just want you to be prepared for the possibility.”
“Should I look forward to this?” she wondered. “What if Laurel’s really pissed off?”
Shelby reached up and grabbed Jackie’s deodorant off the shelf containing the few toiletries she had. “Laurel? Pissed? We talking about the same beautiful psychic here?”
“Okay, point taken. She wouldn’t be pissed. I think. So what do we do now?”
“Breakfast.”
The mere word made her stomach rumble in anticipation. “That sounds good. I’m actually hungry.”
Shelby followed her into the bedroom and borrowed a clean T-shirt. It was like having an older sister come by and rummage through her stuff. She watched Shelby slip off the old shirt, exposing a long, thorny rose vine tattooed down her spine. The stem disappeared somewhere between her cheeks. Seeing it reminded Jackie that Laurel had had a big thing for tattoos but never had the nerve to go get herself poked with needles to get one.
“Laurel would have really liked you,” she said. In its way, the statement was about as close as Jackie could get at the moment to admitting her like for Shelby.
Shelby gave her a wistful smile. “She did. I’m sad we didn’t have more time.”
Jackie heaved a sigh. Everything about Laurel was putting her on the constant verge of tears. “Me, too.”
“Come on, hurry up,” Shelby said. “You need to keep your mind from brooding, and that means getting back to work.”
“Am I strong enough for this?” Why the hell am I asking her this? She realized it would have been something to ask Laurel. Stability. Shelby Fontaine was about as rock solid as you could get, even if she did have one foot in the grave. “I feel like I have loser stamped on my forehead now.”
Shelby turned and crossed her arms over her chest, a very “what the fuck” look on her face. “You catch murderers for a living, Jackie. It doesn’t come much tougher than that. You didn’t catch them just because of Laurel. Prove it to yourself and to her. Remember, she’s dead, but she’s not gone.”
Jackie pulled on her boots and began to tie them. “You realize how ridiculous that sounds.”
“And true nonetheless.”
Yes. Disturbingly true. Laurel had tried to contact her and would probably try again. Was it possible to want and dread something so much at the same time?
Back out in the living room, Nick stopped his blissfully melancholy song when they exited the bedroom. “We going somewhere?”
Shelby nodded. “Breakfast. There’s a Cracker Barrel down the road.”
Nick looked at them both, and Jackie wondered what his thoughts were about this whole debacle. His gaze lingered on hers for a moment, studying her. He shrugged. “All right.”
She hated the fact that he was so difficult to read. Maybe Shelby would show her a trick to looking a vampire in the eye without completely freaking out. They were heading out the door when her cell phone rang. Picking it up, she saw that it came from Gamble. It was awfully early for a wake-up call.
“Hey, Jack,” he said with concern. “You functional?”
“More or less. Getting some food and coming in.”
“Good to hear, ’cause we’ve got vic number four here.”
Damnit. Cracker Barrel had actually sounded good.
Chapter 38
Shelby left in Nick’s car to go get her motorcycle and meet them at the scene. Nick now sat silently in the Durango’s passenger seat, looking straight ahead. Jackie could not help but feel he was somehow usurping Laurel’s spot in her truck. Maybe it was just the silence. Laurel would not have let things be quiet for so long-she would have had something to say, whether important or inane, to fill the void. Jackie wondered if, in fact, Laurel had come up with things to say because she knew the silence made Jackie uncomfortable. It begged the question of just how much Laurel had done in general to keep things running smoothly, because Jackie now realized she had been walking along the brink for a very long time.
“Nick?” She had to talk about something. Maybe it was a male thing to be comfortable in silence, but she could not handle it any longer.
He didn’t bother turning. “What?”
“You bothered about earlier, with all that you… you know.. . said? If you-”
“No. Just thinking about things.”
“Case related? If it is, you might want to clue me in. I’ve been known to be helpful on occasion.”
His glance finally flicked in her direction. “I was thinking about Drake and what happened at the warehouse.”
The subject left her mute for a moment while her stomach knotted. Shit, okay. I can do this. I have to be able to talk about what happened. It’s just a case. “Okay… so what gives?”
Nick turned and looked at her, the brown, luminescent eyes appraising. “I thought it better to avoid talking about that incident just now.”
She leaned on the horn at some ignorant motorist who had not seen the flashing light mounted on the roof of her truck. Jackie wondered if perhaps Nick was right, but that was not going to stop her. “Are you trying to coddle me?”
“What? Coddle?” He leaned away from her, a look of surprise on his face. “No. I was just…” He stopped, and the corner of his mouth turned up a hair. “Yes. I apologize. I just didn’t think it wise.”
A McDonald’s loomed ahead, and Jackie jumped on the brakes, whipping into the parking lot. She pulled in behind three other cars waiting at the drive-through. “You are working with me on this case, aren’t you?”
“Of course,” he said. “We agreed-”
“Good. I’ll readily admit we need yours and Shelby’s help on this case. Vampires-or whatever you are-is beyond our scope. We don’t have a fucking clue, okay? But if you’re going to assist, that means filling me in on everything and anything that might be pertinent to this case. It’s that whole give-and-take of information, formulating plans of attack, and all the other bullshit that goes with it.”
“I realize that, Jackie, but, it’s just… I know everything must be pretty damn raw right now.”
Her knuckles went white on the steering wheel as she gripped it in frustration. “You’re right. It’s raw as hell, and this is really fucking hard right now, but I’ll manage. So spare my feelings when other people’s lives aren’t on the line, okay?” She lowered the window as they reached the speaker. “Egg McMuffin and a large coffee, black. What do you want, Nick?”
“No cash on me,” he said.
Jackie rolled her eyes. “Two hash browns, sausage and egg biscuit, another large coffee, black. That’s it.” She pulled forward, staring straight ahead. God! Five minutes with the man, and he was already annoying the crap out of her. “I think the FBI can front you for some fast-food if you can manage not to treat me like a cracked egg.”