“You’ve come so far, Holly.” A tear falls from my own eyes as I remember back to last year when Holly was in the hospital.
“We have, haven’t we?” She looks over at Sy and Cherry as they weigh her son.
“You deserve it, and Xzavier is beautiful,” I tell her, reaching for her hand and squeezing it.
“Seven pounds six ounces.” Sy walks back over, revealing the weight of his new son. “So proud of you, baby.” He hands her back Xzavier and I step away to give them the privacy they need to bond as a family. And what a gorgeous family it is.
“He’s beautiful, Holly,” Kadence whispers from the visitor’s chair holding baby Xzavier for the first time.
“Thanks.” Holly smiles, forcing her eyes to stay open. She must be exhausted. It’s been a few hours and I thought I would come in and check on her. She still hasn’t had any rest.
“Oh, great, another biker daddy to deal with around the clubhouse.” Jesse’s voice echoes from the doorway of the room, halting all conversations. Shit. Keeping my eyes down on my chart, I slowly step back. I’m not ready to see him today, especially with all his friends around.
“Jesse, don’t be a douche bag.” Holly laughs as he walks straight to her and bends to give her a kiss.
“Proud of you, darlin’,” he whispers, but I still hear him as I place Xzavier’s chart back in its spot and slowly step back. Yeah, Jesse might act like this I-don’t-give-a-shit type of guy, but the more I learn about him, the more I know it’s not true.
“Thanks, Jesse.” She sighs then looks to me. “Did you hear? Bell helped deliver X.” Holly winks at me and I have to hold in my need to roll my eyes at her play. She’s been drilling me about Jesse since I came by, even going as far as to tell me she hasn’t seen Jesse pick up any skanks since the night I left his room. If only she knew how much time Jesse and I have been spending together. Besides the few dinner dates and hospital run ins, we’ve been talking every night for the last two weeks. Every night without fail.
“Did she?” Jesse smirks a knowing grin to me and I didn’t realize how much I missed the cheekiness of it, until it’s staring me in the face. “How are you, Bell?” He asks, stepping closer. He knows how well I’ve been. I just spoke to him last night.
“I’m well, Jesse.” I step out of his way, not needing him to get too close. “Holly, just buzz if you need anything.” I run my finger down baby X’s face, wanting to feel him one more time and move toward the door.
“Can I buzz you if I need anything, Nurse Bell?” Jesse teases but I don’t respond, letting the room laugh at his antics. Such a typical Jesse move. What surprises me is how much I love it.
“What time do you finish up tonight?” Cherry asks when I step behind the nurses’ station.
“I finished my shift thirty minutes ago, but I was just making sure everything was settled.” I tell her, knowing I didn’t have to stay. I wanted to.
“Good, you look exhausted,” she notes and she’s not lying.
“I feel it,” I agree, taking my bag and grabbing my I.D badge.
“You up all night with some lucky man?” Cherry teases and she’s only half right. I spent all night talking to Jesse on the phone, hanging up at three, only to wake up at seven for my shift today.
“Something like that.” I shrug, not even sure what is happening between Jesse and I. It’s not like we’ve labeled it. Hell, it’s not like anything has even happened since our kiss on our first date, but every night he sends a text and every night I respond, which only leads to more texts and then a phone call which can last hours. We don’t talk about what’s growing between us. We just talk. About what? Who knows…everything, and anything? Paige, my family, my job. He talks about the club and Liquid. Once, he talked about his time in the Marines. But only once and it felt forced. He doesn’t talk about his family, only his club family, but even if he’s selective, I still feel like I’m getting to know him more and more.
“He sounds interesting.” She laughs.
“Barely,” I lie, hoping to put her off the scent. The last thing I need is her drilling me about a mystery man.
“Well, have a good night.” She waves me off.
“You too,” I call and hit the elevator button to take me to the main lobby. The cart arrives in no time, but before the doors close shut, Jesse manages to sweep in.
“Barely interesting?” he mocks, stepping into my space and repeating my words back to me.
“What?” I ask, realizing he heard the conversation between Cherry and me.
“I’ve been keeping you up the last week ‘til three a.m. and I’m ‘barely interesting,’” he teases but I can hear a small amount of annoyance in his tone.
“Please, what did you want me to say? Oh, there’s this guy, who only calls me at night, and it’s this big secret, and I have no idea what he really wants with me, oh and he’s helping me find my sister,” I retort and feel stupid for speaking any of it aloud.
“Sure, why not?” He smiles the same smile he uses when he’s trying to get me to react. “Sounds like a nice guy.” He leans down into my space and slides his lips over my cheek. “How are you, sweetheart?” He pulls back waiting for an answer, but still lingers close.
“Tired,” I reply, wishing he would step back and step closer all at the same time. “What are you doing here anyway? I thought you would visit with Holly for a while.”
“If you’ve seen one baby, you’ve seen them all.” He shrugs, but I know he’s full of shit.
“Why do you do that?” I ask, calling him out on it.
“Do what?”
“Act like you don’t care?” My accusation freezes him for a brief second before he recovers.
“Who says I’m acting?” He steps back, a coldness to his tone.
“I am,” I challenge but I don’t know why. We both know Jesse is a man who hides; why I feel the need to call him out on it right now I don’t know. Maybe it’s my way of dealing with the uneasiness of what is happening between us.
“Well, you’re wrong.” He shrugs, his flirty attitude gone, replaced with an almost pissed off one.
“If you say so.” I stop before I push too far. His reaction pisses me off, but I have no right to be pissed. Right?
“I do say so,” he repeats as the door opens. I step out and expect him to follow, but he doesn’t. Just stands there.
“Bye, Jesse.” I wave as the door closes but he doesn’t reply. Letting the situation sink in for a minute, I move away from the elevators and find myself a chair in the waiting room. My stomach sinks as I replay the conversation over in my head.
What the hell just happened? I went from experiencing something so beautiful and coming off a high to Jesse dismissing me.
I can’t keep up with this man.
Eleven JESSE
“Look who decided to show,” my brother Jackson taunts as I get off my bike. It’s Friday night, games night, and I’d rather be anywhere but here. Yet here I am. The truth is, it’s for Bell. Jackson has me by the balls, only helping me if I keep the peace with the family. I wish I could walk away from it all, from her, but the last few weeks have messed me up, ever since the night she called me out in the elevator. I wish I could have answered her truthfully, but I didn’t. Even after, I tried to pull away from her, which only lasted a few hours, before I went back to texting her. No matter how hard I push her out of my head, it’s like she keeps creeping back into my thoughts, and I can’t stop her. My drop ins at the hospital died off, unsure where we stand, but still even today, two weeks later, the need to go see her grows stronger. I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me. My balls are fucking aching, and my head is messed up all over a bitch I haven’t even fucked.
“Yeah, yeah, don’t hold your breath. I can’t stay long.” I walk past him before he can argue with me.