"Because it was…" She paused.
"Was what?"
"Easier." She said shamefully. "Our contract with them is delicate. It seemed the best solution to the problem was to remove Mike from the program so we didn't risk future enrollees."
I stared at her for a minute. "Easier." I finally said, snorting in disgust. "Has it ever occurred to you that you people are educating the people that are going to be running the damn country in twenty or thirty years. The people that are going to be controlling your Medi-Care and Social Security payments? Do you really want them always choosing the path that is easier on them?"
She had no answer for that.
"Mrs. Compleigh," I pleaded. "Can't you do something about this? Mike was trying to become a productive member of society. He was trying. He did something stupid that needs to be addressed. So address it. Talk to him about it. Let him know he did something stupid. Talk to the fire department and see if there's any way they can give him a second chance. If you do that, let me talk to Mike too. I believe I have some influence with him."
She smiled for the first time. "Billy, I believe you about that."
"If he screws up again than you can write him off as a loser and send him to independent study. But please, give him a second chance. Get his file out of the cabinet instead of mine this time. Read it. See how hard he's worked for this goal in the past year. He's trying. How about you do what your job title says and help him. Meet him half way. Please?"
She took a deep breath, her eyes softening. "You're a remarkable young man Billy." She told me.
I shrugged, switching back to my teenager persona. "I try." I said.
"I'll do as you ask." She assured me.
Though she was no longer talking to me and though she no longer sat with me at lunchtime, Nina was still forced to sit next to me in the two classes we shared prior to ROP. We had picked our seats at the beginning of the semester and now we were committed to them; for better or for worse. She would typically spend each class period looking straight ahead as the teacher lectured, occasionally jotting down a note in her binder. She never looked at me or acknowledged my presence in any way.
That day was no different as I sat down for my second class of the day, and the first with her. While awaiting the rest of the class to file in and find their seats she simply stared at her notebook, ignoring the activity around her, ignoring me most of all. Had it only been a week before that we used to chat happily together during this portion of the class, discussing how our day had been until that point, what we were going to do later? It seemed like an eternity had passed since I'd last heard a kind word from her, had seen her smile.
At some point I'd stopped telling myself that I wanted our relationship to mend so that Nina would not turn out to be a bitch later and started telling myself the truth; that I wanted our relationship to mend because I liked our relationship, because I enjoyed being with her. I'd never noticed before how eager I'd been for Nina to come over each day to study with me until she was no longer doing it. All of my brainstorming of the previous day had failed to produce a plan to make-up with her. I simply did not know what to do.
"Nina?" I chanced, leaning towards her a little and whispering.
She hesitated for a second, long enough to make me think that she was not even going to acknowledge my words, but finally she turned her face towards me. Her eyes were blank, revealing nothing of what was going on behind them.
"You heard what happened to Mike?" I asked her.
She nodded slowly. "Yeah. It's too bad."
"I went and saw Mrs. Compleigh today." I told her, thrilled to be even speaking to her. "I think I convinced her to let him back into ROP. He's getting another chance."
She nodded softly. "Good." She said. "I like Mike."
There was a long silence. Just as she started to turn her head back to her notebook I whispered, "I miss you."
She looked at my face for a second, her eyes still blank. Without saying anything she turned her attention back to her notebook. She said nothing.
"Nina?" I said.
She ignored me. Before I could try again the bell rang and the teacher called the class to order. He then began the day's lecture on the Principals of Chemistry.
All day I dreaded what I had to do when I got from school. When I finally arrived home my mind tried to find excuses to delay or even postpone the task at hand. There was homework to be done, housework to be done, deep thoughts to think, bodily functions to take care of. The rational part of me rejected these excuses one by one and finally I put my coat back on and headed out the door.
A short walk brought me to Anita's house. I made my way to her front door, almost left again, and finally, employing my willpower, I pushed her doorbell.
She was very pleased at my unexpected arrival. It showed in her face as she swung open the door. She was dressed in a pair of baggy sweat pants and a T-shirt. It was obvious that she had no bra on beneath.
"Hi Billy." She beamed, standing aside to allow me entry. "Come on in. What a pleasant surprise."
Her children were sitting at the dining room table working on some learning books. An array of crayons and construction paper was spread out before them. They looked up, greeted me briefly, and then went back to what they were doing. Anita, once the door was closed, leaned forward and gave me a kiss on the mouth, probing outward with her tongue for just the briefest instant. She made a point to rub her unencumbered breasts against my chest.
"Anita." I hissed. "Your kids are right here!"
"Oh you." She slapped at me playfully, breaking the embrace. "They're going to have to get used to us eventually anyway aren't they?"
"Uh…" I started.
"So what brings you over here today?" She asked me teasingly. "Need another shower?"
"No." I shook my head quickly, banishing the image of dumping oil all over her before it could give me an erection. As I mentioned before, my mind may have been in my thirties but my body was firmly entrenched in my teens. Testosterone was surging through my veins and calmly assuring another part of my body that it wouldn't really hurt to just take a quick shower with her before we had our talk. Just to mellow everyone out a little.
"Oh," Anita nodded knowingly. "You want to get dirty first. Give me a minute to set up a movie for the kids. That'll keep them distracted longer."
"Anita," I said, "That's not why I came over here. I need to talk to you about something."
Perhaps catching the tone of my voice, she gave me a wary look. "What do you want to talk about?" She asked carefully.
"Can we sit down somewhere?" I asked her. "Somewhere private?" And somewhere without a lot of sharp objects, I did not add.
"Sure." She said. "Let's go to the bedroom."
I nodded. "Okay."
We went into her room and I grabbed a chair near her dresser. She gave me another concerned look as I did this. She sat down on the edge of the bed.
"What's wrong Billy?" She asked me.
I breathed deeply and slowly let it out. "Anita," I told her. "I don't know how to tell you this but it needs to be said."
"Tell me what?"
"I suppose the best way is to just come out and say it." I said, looking at her face. "We need to end our relationship with each other."
"End…" She whispered, staring at me. Finally she gave a nervous giggle. "Billy, don't joke about things like that. It's not very…"
"Anita, I'm not joking." I told her. "We have to stop seeing each other."
"You're not joking?" She asked softly.
"No." I shook my head. "I'm not."
She began to wring her hands together. "I don't understand Billy." She told me. "Why would you say something like that? We're perfect together. We have a good thing going."
"That's just it Anita." I explained. "We DON'T have a good thing going and we're NOT perfect together. I'm sixteen years old and you're twenty-eight. I'm a teenager in high school and you're a full-grown woman with kids."