When it was time for Willis to get his photographs taken, Dillon and I walked him back to his trailer, and he changed into what looked like the exact same pair of skinny jeans.
‘Stay right there, that’s perfect,’ said the photographer. ‘These are great.’ I was getting frustrated. Surely this would be over soon? How many photos of Willis with his legs crossed, leaning slightly forward in the middle of the road, did they actually need? After what felt like an age, they moved him over to the trees, and then further into the field to get some more shots. Ellie asked Dillon and me to stay behind and start packing up all the outfits, none of which Willis had actually agreed to wear. I didn’t blame him – some of them looked seriously dodgy.
‘That’s a wrap, folks,’ said Ellie a few minutes later.
‘Brilliant,’ said Willis. ‘This means I’ll be able to catch my flight to New York after all.’
Ellie smiled, obviously delighted that the whole thing had gone off without a hitch. But her expression soon changed when she saw the anxious look on Willis’s face.
‘Crap,’ he said. ‘I think I must have dropped my Zippo… my wife got it for me for our anniversary – it’s engraved and everything. She’s going to KILL me.’
‘Jacki will find it,’ said Ellie with such assurance that it actually scared me. I already felt sick and I was in no state to be left in charge of finding an expensive and sentimental lighter. I trudged into the field, muck clinging to my Converse. I walked in the same direction they’d taken, hoping to see a glint of silver in among all the grass, but I found nothing. I kept looking and looking and I could hear Ellie calling my name, but I didn’t answer. What did she think I was, some sort of miracle worker? Then I saw it; not the lighter, but the barbed-wire fence.
It ran between the field we were in and the next. I rushed over to it and got the strangest feeling. I felt like I was sinking, even though I was standing perfectly still. I felt like everything was moving around me, just like I had the first time I’d dreamed about Kayla. Then I saw her, out of the corner of my eye, her red hair speeding past me in a blur.
This was it. I’d found it – I’d found her grave. I couldn’t believe it. I had to tell Detective Sergeant Lawlor straight away.
Then, on the other side of the fence I saw something glinting in the sunlight – Willis’s lighter. I made a mental note of exactly where I was, then took a few pictures on my phone, just to be sure I could find the place again. Then I rushed back to the others.
‘Oh, wow,’ said Willis. ‘Thank you so much! You’re an angel.’
‘It’s OK, no big deal,’ I said.
‘No, you don’t understand – the missus would actually have murdered me. I don’t usually do this,’ he said, ‘but here’s my card.’ He handed me his business card and smiled. Then he said goodbye to everyone and got into his car. He gave me the call-me signal from the window.
‘If you’re ever in NY, hit me up,’ he shouted as the car pulled away.
‘Wow. Well done, Jacki!’ said Dillon, putting his hand on my arm. We both realized what he had done and stepped apart hastily.
‘Dillon, I… er… I need to make a call.’
And I stumbled off.
Matt answered straight away.
‘I think I know where she’s buried,’ I said.
‘You serious?’
‘Yes. I’ve got an exact location – it’s in the Dublin mountains. There’s obviously no sign of a grave now because it’s all overgrown, but I know she’s buried there, I’d bet my life on it. We have to start digging.’
‘It doesn’t work like that, Jacki. I can’t just start digging. I need to give the team a reason.’
‘I’m giving you one. I have a strong feeling that she’s buried down there.’
‘I need a name, Jacki. I need some evidence. Detective Sergeant Lonergan is concerned that you haven’t come up with a name for us yet. Now this isn’t my view at all. I’m just telling you what he said. I told him that you are the best there is and that you’ll have something for us when the time is right, but he’s getting impatient.’
‘What exactly did he say?’ I asked. ‘Tell me, I can handle it.’
‘He said… he said he doesn’t know if you’re up to it.’
‘I know where she’s buried.’
‘I need a warrant to search there, and I can’t get one of those without -’
‘Fine,’ I said. ‘I’m still working on it. I’ll do everything I can to get you a name. Just hold on for another little while.’
Now that I’d found where I believed she was buried, I suddenly had a renewed passion for solving the case. I’d let the real reason I was in Dublin get all swallowed up by everything that was happening in my love life (or lack of) and I felt bad. I was going to give Kayla justice and solve this case once and for all.
I called Andrew and asked to meet him at the ice-cream place. He started to protest, muttering something about going to Calum’s, but eventually agreed.
When I got there, Andrew was sitting by himself in a corner of the café, tapping his fingers on the table. It was really obvious he didn’t want to be there. He nodded when he saw me, but didn’t smile. That was fine with me – I didn’t need a welcoming committee. I just had one question I needed him to answer.
‘Would you like to explain this?’ I said, showing him the photograph of Kayla in the jersey.
‘I didn’t take that,’ he said.
‘It was on your phone.’
‘So? It’s on a few people’s phones.’
‘What?’
‘Calum sent it to us when none of us would believe he’d slept with Kayla. That’s her, and she’s wearing his jersey. I honestly thought he was making it up, but that’s definitely his. And I doubt he would have gone to the trouble of stealing that picture from her.’
I hated to admit it, but I had a feeling he was telling the truth. I could ask the others, but I pretty much knew they would corroborate what Andrew said.
I was back at square one and still no closer to helping the girl who haunted my dreams.
Chapter 20
Whenever we’re in the same city, Hannah and I always get ready to go out together. It’s like a ritual. I go over to her house, or she comes over to mine, and we gossip as we listen to music and apply eye shadow and try to decide which top to wear. Right now I was at hers, watching as she stood on her bed, singing along to the Rolling Stones. I was wearing my new black dress, even though I felt like putting on my pyjamas and going back to bed. I still wasn’t feeling great – in fact I felt terrible. But I had to admit there was a possibility that Hannah was right – that forcing myself to go out and be sociable might actually make things better. So I was going to try it. I still hadn’t heard from Nick. I wasn’t proud of it, but I’d sent him one last text, asking him to talk to me. I’d regretted it immediately. I knew deep down that he probably wasn’t going to answer. I hadn’t told Hannah. I couldn’t deal with the disapproving glances that would follow that sort of confession.
‘So, who’s coming out tonight?’ I asked.
‘Ross,’ said Hannah. ‘And Sophie says she hates karaoke, but I reckon we’ll get around her. That’s it, I think, just the four of us. Not that many people were up for it.’
‘Yeah, how come your mum’s letting you go?’ I said. She was usually pretty strict, not that it ever actually stopped Hannah.
‘I told her you were broken-hearted and needed a distraction.’
‘Stop using my situation to feed your karaoke habit.’
Hazel had told me I could bring some friends to karaoke night in Rage for free. It was so nice of her. She hardly even knew me.
‘I dunno what I should sing,’ said Hannah. ‘Should I go for a classic or sing something a bit more out there?’ Hannah took karaoke way too seriously. She’d been attending musical theatre classes since she was four and had a very good voice. Although it wasn’t her first love, she wanted to be one of those actors who could also sing well if required.