“I’m not your mom,” Winston said, “and I promise you that no matter what, I am going to be here when this is over. I’m not going to die, and I have no intention of leaving you here alone.”
“You’ll be safe there. Here you might die. Think about it. Heidi and Jesse died here. They died, Win. We buried them. They are never going home again no matter what.”
“I could die there, in the World That Is. The difference is that here I get to be with you.”
“You can’t—”
“Quit telling me what I can and can’t do, Alicia Munroe. I won’t leave you here while I run away.”
He kissed me again and instead of arguing, this time I decided to enjoy it. Even if the Fate Maker was coming for me in two days, it didn’t mean I was going to let him ruin the time I had left.
“Your Majesty,” Ardere said, appearing in front of us.
Winston let go of me and turned to bow his head to the gold dragon who had been acting as his mentor.
“Troops have been spotted along the north road. We’re going to fly a night patrol to scout out their plans if we can.”
“I’m coming.” Winston nodded and turned back to kiss me once again.
“Don’t.” I grabbed his arm. “We need you here in case they attack the palace. He said two days, but it could be a lie. They could be out there waiting in the dark. It could be a trap.”
“I have to go.”
“No, you can stay.” I kept a tight grip on his arm. “Other dragons can go out on patrol, and you can stay.”
“I can’t. You’re the queen, and you have a job to do.”
“And I’m doing it,” I protested.
“So let me do mine. I am a dragon and that means I need to be in the sky with my clan.”
“But—”
“Try to get some sleep, Allie.” Winston looked me in the eye. “I’ll be back in the morning.”
“What if something happens to—”
He kissed me one last time before following Ardere out of the garden and toward the aerie.
“Be safe,” I said quietly as I watched him leave. I pressed my fingers to my lips and closed my eyes, focusing every ounce of my being on the wish I was making. “Please be safe.”
Chapter Twelve
Early the next morning I sat on a bench next to my window, staring out at the labyrinth, and waited for the sun to come up. Winston and the dragon scouts hadn’t made it back to the palace yet and I couldn’t sleep. Not until I saw them on the horizon and heard them landing in the gardens. Until I knew that none of the warriors who had gone out there had died.
So instead I’d paced. Then, when pacing had gotten to be too much, I’d cleaned out my closet. Then I’d organized the soaps in the bathroom. Anything to keep busy. Anything to keep my mind off the dragons who were putting themselves in danger in my name.
I looked at the bracelet on my wrist and shook my head. A fire a million times hotter than the combined breaths of all the dragons… But according to everything I’d seen in the library there was nothing in Nerissette hotter than the fire of a dragon. Nothing. Not even the legends of the Firas—the fire worshippers who lived in the southern part of Nerissette—hinted at anything hotter than the flames of a dragon.
I sat at the dressing table and glanced at my jewelry box. I undid the clasp on the crystal necklace Winston had given me and placed it inside. Then I looked over at the container my crown was kept in, a box that only the Fate Maker and I could open. It was such an obvious place to hide it I had to hope that he wouldn’t look there. But at the same time, the box was imbued with magic. It would keep the tear safe.
I dropped the bracelet into the box and slammed the lid shut. “I don’t know how exactly you work,” I said to the box, trying not to feel stupid talking to an inanimate object. “But I think your fate and mine pretty much depend on you not opening up again for anyone but me. So if the Fate Maker, or anyone else, tries to open you…”
The box began to vibrate against my fingers like it could understand me.
“Slam your lid down on their fingers hard enough to break the bones,” I whispered. The box began to hum even stronger then, like it enjoyed the idea. Apparently, my bed wasn’t my only bloodthirsty belonging.
I walked into my closet, leaving the door open behind me, and brushed past the dresses that lined the walls. I reached for the plain brass door handle at the end of the room, turning it and letting the door swing open.
Heidi’s room. Or her cell, as she’d called it.
The room was plain, barely big enough to hold a bed and a hook for her clothes. There wasn’t even a window, but it held the only furniture in my tower that would allow her to sleep on it. The only room that wouldn’t slam its door in her face. The only place in my entire palace that made her feel at home.
I sat down on her lumpy bed and sighed. I should have done more to help her adjust. To protect her. She’d been trapped here because of me and I should have done more to keep her safe.
The changes we’d faced here in Nerissette had been hardest on Heidi. She’d gone from being most popular person in our class to picking up after the girl she’d spent years bullying. She had to bow and scrape to someone she’d tortured just because she could get away with it.
Part of me had wanted to torture her back when we’d gotten here. I’d wanted to make her life as miserable as she’d made mine. Everyone in the school had worshipped her, and she had everything she’d ever wanted. But when the time came and our roles were reversed, I couldn’t make her feel as small and insignificant as she had made me feel every day. I just couldn’t.
I reached for her pillow, and my hand brushed against something underneath it. I tossed the pillow to the foot of the bed and found the pile of stuff stacked underneath it. The clothes Heidi had been wearing when we arrived. Her cell phone. Lip gloss. A mirror to check her makeup.
I reached for her cell phone and turned it on, surprised to see that it still had a charge. Her phone beeped and her wallpaper lit up. It was a picture of her and Jesse at Kennywood, the amusement park less than twenty minutes from school where we always had our end-of-the-year school trips, smiling for the camera with a roller coaster in the background. I stared at the picture of our home, my heart clenching as I remembered how much easier it had been back then. Back when Heidi was still the queen bee and the world made sense.
I flipped through her photo folder, ruthlessly invading her privacy in a way that would’ve mortified me if the tables were turned, but right now I wanted to see what our world, the world that made sense, had been like for Heidi. Inside were pictures of her with the other cheerleaders, her parents, a little boy I thought might be her younger brother. And hundreds of pictures of Jesse. Jesse at football games. Jesse at the movies, playing soccer. Pictures of the two of them at last year’s spring formal.
Her life had been filled with Jesse—a guy who had dumped her for me the minute our roles were reversed. Not that I’d wanted Jesse. Sure, he was the hottest guy in school, but he wasn’t my type—he wasn’t tall or dark or able to turn himself into a large black dragon. I felt a small stab of sadness in my heart as I looked at her pictures, though. He’d told me once that I didn’t know how rough Heidi really had it, and I’d laughed at him. As far as I could see she’d had the perfect guy, the perfect family, and the perfect life. Now, though, looking at her pictures of the “perfect guy” and remembering how he’d treated her, I couldn’t help but wonder if he’d been right. I’d had no idea what sort of crap she was going through.