“And…to top it off, he’s soaking wet! Why is he soaking wet?”
“That was not my fault! Jeff pushed me into the water, and then he tried to drown me. Gunner jumped in, and—”
Ari put her hand up to get me to stop talking. She looked at all three of us, just now noticing our wet clothes. Her mouth fell open as she glared at Jeff. “You let Matt swim in the freezing cold lake? Have you gone insane, Jefferson Johnson?”
“No! I didn’t let him swim. He just kind of…well, he just…he kind of saw the three of us in the water, and…well, I guess he wanted to join the boys.”
The look on Ari’s face caused me to start laughing. Then, Gunner and Jeff started laughing. By now, Ellie and Heather had come out. Ellie was laughing, and Heather was just standing there, smiling. The moment her eyes caught mine, her smile faded. It was quickly replaced by a panicked look. She almost seemed like she was about to get sick. She threw her hand up to her mouth, turned, and ran back inside.
I took off running up the stairs to the house and went in after her. I watched as she bolted into a bathroom and slammed the door shut.
I knocked lightly on the door. “Heather, are you okay?”
“I’m okay, Josh. Thanks. I just feel sick. I’ll be out in a few minutes,” she said in such a sweet, soft voice.
Leaning my head on the door, I just stood there for a few minutes. I swore I could hear her crying. I’m hurting her. By not remembering…I’m hurting her.
I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned to see Jeff with Luke in his arms. When Luke reached out for me, I looked at Jeff, confused.
“Dude, he wants you to hold him,” Jeff said with a smile.
I held out my hands, and Luke came right to me. He wrapped his little arms around my neck and put his head down on my shoulder.
Oh. My. God. My knees felt like they were about to give out. When I put my hand on his little back, I could feel him breathing. He smelled so damn good. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes.
God, please…please just give me my life back. I just want to remember all of this. I want to remember Heather.
I wasn’t sure how long I’d been standing there, just taking in this sweet little man, but neither one of us moved.
“You feeling better, Heather?” Jeff asked.
I slowly turned around and saw Heather leaning against the doorjamb. She had the sweetest smile on her face.
“He always did love you so much,” she said.
I smiled back at her. I didn’t even know what to say. Her beauty left me speechless. As I looked her up and down, my heartbeat started racing. I handed Luke back to Jeff. When I turned back around, she was looking at Luke in Jeff’s arms.
I walked up to her and reached my hand behind her neck, pulling her to me. I leaned down and captured her lips with mine. She wrapped her arms around my neck and kissed me back with so much passion that I thought I would explode. I’d never in my life experienced this type of kiss, this type of emotion.
Barely pulling away from her lips, I whispered, “I want that to be my last first kiss.”
She smiled, and then she let out a giggle. “That wasn’t our first kiss though.”
“It was for me. I’ve never before experienced so much emotion in just one kiss. Everything I experience with you is new, beautiful, and breathtaking.”
She pulled back from me and looked into my eyes. I saw the tears forming in her eyes, and the last thing I wanted to do was hurt her more. I reached down and gently kissed her on the lips again. The low moan that came from her mouth moved through my whole body.
I love this girl. I love her. I need to tell her right now. “Heather, I—”
“Sorry, y’all, but Luke’s getting fussy, and we need to head home,” Ari said from behind me.
Heather looked at me with pleading eyes.
I smiled and kissed the tip of her nose. “Tonight?”
She gave me a sweet smile and nodded.
I turned and saw Luke trying with all his might to get out of Ari’s arms. I laughed as I reached for him, and then I started to fly him around like an airplane. My fucking side was killing me but I’d never felt so damn happy in my life.
By the time I made it back to my parents’ house, my ribs were killing me. I showered and took some pain medicine since my little romp in the lake and then playing with Luke were doing me in now.
When I walked down the stairs, I heard my mother talking to someone. I looked at my watch and wondered where Heather was. She’d said she had to stop at Party City to pick up supplies for my birthday party tomorrow.
Right as I was turning into the kitchen, I heard Heather’s voice. My heart stopped and fell into my stomach. Shit. Did it feel like this the first time I fell in love with her? My fucking hands started sweating, and I almost turned to go back upstairs. What the hell is wrong with me? Why am I so nervous? Just tell her how you feel, Josh. That’s what Gunner said. Be honest. I took a deep breath and walked into the kitchen. They were both laughing, and then my mother looked up at me and smiled.
“Hey, handsome. I heard you had an exciting day,” she said as she winked at Heather.
I laughed. “I’d say. I taught Matthew a few new words, I think. I swam in the freezing cold water at Lake Travis while Jeff tried to drown me, got chewed out by Ari, and discovered that I…” I stopped myself.
Heather tilted her head. “Discovered what?”
“Um…I discovered…that I’m still a damn good fisherman,” I said, trying to cover up my almost confession of love.
My mother opened the refrigerator and started looking around. “Huh. You must not be that good ’cause I don’t see any fish in here,” she said, turning to me with a smile.
“Thanks, Mom.”
For two hours, we talked about everything from the party to when I would move back into my apartment.
“Mom, I think I’m more than ready to move back into my apartment. Are you going to be moving in with me, Heather?” The blush that covered her cheeks turned me on so fucking bad that I found myself daydreaming about what it would be like to make love to her.
An image of me making love to Heather in the rain popped into my head. I closed my eyes as I tried to make it come into focus. Where are we? Is this real or just my imagination?
“So, we can set up a small table by the spa side of the pool. We can move the lounge chairs, so people can walk around a little bit more…” my mother said.
The lounge chairs! We’re in the lounge chairs. I stood up so fast that my chair fell backward, scaring Heather and my mother. I hustled outside, heading to the pool.
“Holy hell, Josh. Where’s the fire?” Mom called after me.
I walked up to the lounge chairs and stared at them. Goddamn it! Remember!
“Josh?”
Just the sound of her voice had me wanting her so fucking bad. I couldn’t look at her. If I were to look at her, I would take her right here in this damn chair, and I wouldn’t even care if my mother were watching or not. Okay, that’s a lie. That’d be fucked-up.
“Josh, are you okay? Is something wrong?”
Oh god, that voice. I turned around and looked at her. That was a mistake.
Those beautiful blue eyes were looking right back into mine. It was like she could see into my soul, but I couldn’t see into hers.
“I, um…I think I overdid it today. I took some pain medicine, and I’m really tired right now,” I said, glancing down at her lips. Oh god, I want her so much. Control, Josh. Fuck, get control of yourself.
I looked back up into her eyes. She was smiling as her eyes glanced at the lounge chair for a quick second before she looked back at me.
Another image flooded my brain. Heather was on top, making love to me in the lounge chair. Her head was thrown back, and she was moving slowly while I was holding her in my arms. I closed my eyes and shook my head. Am I remembering this? Or is this just a dream?