“Is there anything you need help with? Anything I can do?”
“No, but thank you. Timing just sucks really bad. My parents have been there for us—especially for me with Ayla—that I’m glad I can give it back.”
“Why does Robin get such bad migraines?”
Bree groaned, and I could tell it was a topic she didn’t care for. “We don’t know. She’s had scans done, but they couldn’t find anything wrong. They have no idea why she gets them or what to do for them other than the Botox.”
“Don’t tell my sister this…she might fake a headache to get Botox,” I teased.
“Oh no…this is nothing like that. She gets thirty-one injections. Seven in the forehead, four on each side of her head, ten in the back, and six in her shoulders—three on each side. It’s very painful.”
“Damn…all for a migraine.”
“It’s not just a migraine. It’s chronic.”
“That makes me never want to complain of a simple headache again. That’s got to suck.” I didn’t know what else to say, feeling as if I’d offended her without meaning to.
“Yeah, tell me about it. Imagine how I was when I first moved here. I felt like I couldn’t say anything about my pregnancy aches around her. She never held it against me, or played the ‘I’ve got it worse’ card. But I remember times when my feet were so swollen I could barely walk, and she’d help me raise them and bring me things to keep me off them, all while barely being able to see past her own pain.”
“She sounds like an amazing woman.”
“She really is. Apparently, she’d wanted my dad to get custody of me a long time before that, but he couldn’t. And I found out that they used to have a lot of fights over me. She’d get mad that he never called me very much, and he’d get mad that he couldn’t and take it out on her. It made me feel really bad to hear that.” Her voice was quiet, and the image of her lying in bed filtered through my mind.
“She told you that?”
“No. The girls did.”
“How was that? Suddenly having two sisters?” I wanted to hear every detail. I wanted to know everything about her and her life since us.
“Amazing. I was so scared before moving. All I could picture was Cinderella. I thought they’d be nasty, and that Robin would make me her bitch. But it was nothing like that at all. They all welcomed me in with open arms.”
“I’m really happy for you, Bree. It makes me really happy to know that everything has worked out for you.” And that was the truth.
“Thank you, Axel. I know it sounds really weird to say, but I don’t think I would’ve made it had you not left. It was a really shitty thing that happened, and I don’t like how it affected you, but I firmly believe that if one thing about us had changed, I wouldn’t be here right now. I wouldn’t have Ayla, I wouldn’t have my dad, Robin, or my sisters. My job sucks; I’m not doing what I want to do. And I’m living with my sister. I was a teen mom, money is tight, and sometimes I get lonely…but it sure as hell beats what I had to endure living with my mom. I was shown that there is an entire different side to life.”
“Yeah. I know what you mean. It doesn’t matter what I went through, just as long as you came out a winner. My poor choices damaged me…but it didn’t kill me. At least I’m still here, and we’ve found each other again.”
She fell silent for a moment, but then cleared her throat and said, “Axel? You said you drank a lot, and then decided to be sober. Did you go to rehab or anything? Or do you have to go to those AA meetings?”
“I never went to rehab. I realized my ways before I’d gotten to the point where I needed to seek outside help. My sister and Danny were enough of a support for me. And I’ve thought about checking out some meetings, although I never have. For the most part, I don’t even think about drinking. Well, I didn’t until you showed back up.”
“I make you want to drink again?”
I let out a light chuckle, even though my situation was far from funny. “No. Not really. But you have to remember that I started drinking because I didn’t know how to handle the loss of you. I didn’t know how to sort through my feelings regarding everything that happened between us. So instead of being an adult about it, I decided to numb it, not wanting to deal with it at all. And then you came back and set me straight on everything I’d assumed before. It was like everything I thought I’d buried long ago has been dug up, and is now haunting me.” I paused to take a breath, organizing my thoughts. “But to answer your question, no. You don’t make me want to drink. I thought about it once. But I know better than to go down that road again.”
“I’m glad,” she whispered.
“You sound tired. I’m going to let you go.”
“Goodnight, Axel. I’m picking Ayla up from school tomorrow, so maybe I’ll see you in pick-up line. If not. I’ll call you after we come back from my parents’ house and she settles down.”
I fell asleep, looking forward to seeing her after school the next day.
The following morning, I found an unfinished kitchen table at the end of my street, and put it into the back of my truck on my way to work. I planned to take it to Bree after school and surprise her with it. The anticipation of giving it to her, and the look on her face is what passed the time quickly.
With only ten more minutes left in the day, I went over some flyers that I put in the folders to send home with the kids. “This weekend, the kindergarten classes are having a father-daughter dance on Saturday night and a mother-son bowling game on Sunday. Your parents need to have the forms filled out and turned into the office by Friday.”
“What if we don’t have a father?” one of the girls in the front row asked quietly.
My heart sank for her, and I immediately thought of Ayla. “You don’t have to come with a father. You can ask your grandfather, or an uncle to be your guest. Maybe a grownup you’re close with.”
The little girl smiled and went back to getting ready to leave.
“We’re going to line up in five minutes, so make sure you have your folders and lunch boxes in your backpacks.” I turned and sat behind my desk, putting my own things away for the day.
“My papa still isn’t feeling good. And I don’t have anybody to go with me to the dance.” A small, timid voice spoke up from in front of me, melting my heart.
I glanced up and my heart fell as I saw Ayla standing in front of me with the saddest expression on her face. Her aqua-colored eyes seemed dull, not quite as full of life as I had become accustomed to. “I’m sure your friends won’t mind sharing their daddies with you. And I’ll be there for anyone who needs someone.”
A smile lifted the corners of her tiny lips a little.
“Listen to me, Ayla. I’m sure your papa feels real bad he can’t be there for you. But I bet he’ll make it up to you as soon as he’s feeling better. You two will have lots of adventures together, once he’s feeling well again. And as far as your dad, I think if he could, he’d love to be in your life.” I don’t know why I said that, maybe to make her feel better? Whatever the reason, it only made me question more. “Do you know anything about your dad?”
“Mommy says I laugh like him,” she said with a brighter smile.
“And what kind of laugh is that?”
She ducked her head, hiding her rosy cheeks as her shoulders bobbed up and down with the quiet laughter that took over her body.