I panicked at the thought that I may have screwed up my aunt’s chances. “That’s not true. You scared me. I can do it. I’m –”
“Nothing more than a fake. There isn’t anything innocent about you, is there Monroe?” he lips curled as he spit his harsh words at me.
“Please, Keiran.”
“Don’t…say…my…name. Ever.” I never understood why he forbid me to say his name. He was simply a mystery I may never solve. Before I could say anything further the front door opened and I froze.
“What the hell?”
“Dude…”
“Shit.”
I recognized the sound of Sheldon, Dash and Keenan’s voice behind me, in that order. We were still in the hall when he had forced me on my knees so the door had opened up right on us.
Keiran continued to stare at me while righting his jeans and appearing unfazed by the intrusion. Embarrassment flooded my cheeks and I was glued to the spot. Though Keiran was the only one exposed it was apparent what had taken place. I was no longer lying on the floor when they arrived but I was still on my knees.
Everyone had grown quiet. The humiliation of my situation was overwhelming and then I was crying again. I was always crying. When would I fight back?
“That’s enough. Lake, get up.” Sheldon tugged on my arm until I was standing but I kept my gaze lowered. She then turned on Keiran. “What the hell is wrong with you? She may be afraid of you, but I’m not. If I catch you doing some shit like this to her again I will kick your ass. If I find out there was foul play, I will turn you in myself. Got it?”
“Foul play? You mean rape?” he asked in a sarcastic tone. “I don’t rape. But then, Monroe and I both know I wouldn’t have to. She’d give it up and I wouldn’t hesitate to take anything she offered.”
I hugged my waist and listened to him insinuate that I wanted him. I didn’t want him. He was my enemy…or maybe it was just my body that desired him while my mind feared him. I just wished I knew what it was about him that made my body betray me in such a confusing way.
Sheldon hugged my shoulders and walked us away from the guys and I felt a moment of self-loathing. I hated looking like the victim. I wasn’t a victim. Right?
Chapter Nine
Sheldon took me upstairs and locked us in the bathroom where she grilled me endlessly. I couldn’t tell her the truth but I didn’t lie either. I told her that Keiran had just been taunting me as usual. She had a few choices words to say about Keiran but let it go. I was cleaning my face with the warm cloth she’d given me when a hard knock on the door interrupted the silence. Sheldon opened the door to reveal Keiran standing on the other side and immediately moved to shield me from him.
“What do you want?”
“Leave,” he said barely acknowledging her. His gaze was focused on me and I stared back.
I wanted to look away but couldn’t. I’ve never seen him look at me this way before. The memory of his cock in my mouth came rushing back. I blushed and finally looked away, breaking the connection.
“I’m taking her home.” The relief I felt was short-lived at the look on his face. The cold calculation in his eyes told me that she would quickly become another victim of his wrath if I didn’t interfere. I couldn't let her suffer the brunt of his anger. I had years to learn how to survive it.
“Sheldon, it’s fine.” She looked at me with surprise etched all over face and I wished I could take her help. “Really, it’s okay.” I had trouble holding her gaze.
“Sheldon, come here!” Keenan’s voice boomed from somewhere out in the hallway.
She gave me one last look before leaving the bathroom with a terse ‘Fine’. Keiran motioned for me to follow him so I tossed the cloth into the bin and followed him to his bedroom.
“Are you taking me home soon?” He ignored me and picked my phone up from the large black dresser and tossed it to me. I took turns looking from the device to him.
“Your aunt called. Call her back and let her know that everything is fine.”
“Oh…right.” I dialed her number.
“Put it on speaker,” he ordered. I was careful not to show my aggravation and upset him. He could change his mind and my aunt would worry if I didn't call.
Her anxious voice filtered through the phone after the third ring. “Hey, Aunt Carissa.”
“Lake, thank God! How is everything?” She attempted to sound normal but I could hear the stress and fatigue, which was weird because she usually has fun on her tours.
“Everything is great here. How are you?”
“Oh you know, I’ve been signing books all day. Nothing major.”
Her answer only increased my worry. Aunt Carissa was usually full of excitement and everything dealing with her books and readers was major. She loved being a writer. “Are you sure? You sound tired.”
“Yes, I’m fine. Listen, I have to go but how was school?”
“School is school. I guess I will talk to you later,” I stated slowly with a frown and a heavy heart.
“Great. And Lake? I love you, sweetie.” The line went dead before I could respond in kind. I felt sick, despite her reassurance, remembering the last time I saw and spoke to my parents. Would Aunt Carissa leave me too?
“I should go home. Can you take me now?”
“We’re having a party. You should stick around.” He plucked my phone out of my hand and pocketed it. I didn’t like the sound of his invitation. It sounded more like the order I knew it to be.
“Thanks, but no thanks,” I answered sarcastically. I would really rather go home.”
“I wasn’t asking. Do I explain this to you again? I don’t trust you. I’m keeping an eye on you. Simple as that.”
“It isn’t really about keeping an eye on me though, is it?” His body stiffened and I could tell I struck a nerve. Rather than scare me away it gave me the motivation I needed to push him. “What’s the matter? You can’t get it up unless you’re angry?” I circled around him the way he did me that day in the cafeteria over a year ago. I taunted and tested how far I could go. “Is that what you hide? Some sick, twisted fantasy? Tell me…is it special for me or is it all women? Mommy didn’t love you enough so you –”
The punishing hand around my jaw stopped me and once again my words were lost to me. He bent my body backward over his low dresser and leaned close. The coldness in his eyes could not be mistaken for anything but deep hatred.
“It’s only for you, never doubt that. No one else makes me feel this way. No one. It’s always been you. It will always be you.”
The subtle threat in his words sent a cold chill through my body. Up this close I could see the light stubble along his jaw, evidence that he didn’t shave this morning and I couldn’t help to think how incredibly sexy and masculine he looked with it.
“Is that supposed to scare me?” I sounded tougher than I was feeling but he didn’t have to know that.
“It already does.”
“Is that what you want to hear? That I am afraid of you? That I am still afraid of you? Yes, I am afraid but that is all I will ever feel for you. It is the need to survive. You can’t control me beyond that. Let me go.”
“I can’t do that.”
“Why not? I haven’t done anything and don’t plan to whether or not you choose to believe it, but it is the damn truth.” I searched his eyes for even a glimmer of belief but they remained unyielding. My back was beginning to shake from the strain of nearly being bent in half not to mention the effect his being close was having on me.
“Because I still hate you, Monroe. Never forget that.”
* * *
Sheldon and Keenan were already downstairs by the time we finally emerged from his bedroom. His last words were still echoing in my head. While I had accepted long ago that Keiran would always hate me it didn’t make hearing it each time any easier.