I knew when we reached it there would not be a soul anywhere in sight on Black Point Beach, just the great surf of the Atlantic Ocean, constantly throwing up waves to meet the shore.
I started to talk as we drove down the winding road.
“You know that I went to law school in Charlottesville, at the University of Virginia, right? I loved it there and I loved everything about the law school experience, which is quite unusual, as you’ve heard. It’s a great school and it’s also one of the most beautiful places in the country. From my first semester I knew that I wanted to go into public service, and I knew that I wanted to be a prosecutor they were a natural overlap and Paul Battaglia had the reputation for running the best District Attorney’s office anywhere.
“So I was off on the right foot academically, from the start. School was interesting, the friends I made there were fantastic it was a long time since I’d been in classes with and I was playing as hard as I was working.
“One Saturday afternoon my friends Jordan and Susan‘ whom Mike knew well’ invited me out to the house they rented to go horseback riding… a big mistake for a Jewish girl from Westchester whose only experience on a horse had been at the Bronx Zoo. We were only doing a trail ride, but my horse got spooked by a snake and threw me. I went straight to the University Hospital Emergency Room with my left hand kind of dangling three fingers badly fractured.”
We had reached the end of the dirt path and I parked the car so Mike and I could get out and walk over the dunes.
He followed my lead as I kicked off my shoes and left them in the car.
“Enter Adam Nyman the resident on duty in the Emergency Room. He splinted my fingers, convinced me that law students male variety were pedantic and boring, and took me to dinner. I fell madly in love and we spent every free moment together from that weekend on. Fill in the details I’m sure you can.”
“Was he a Vineyarder?” Mike asked.
“No, but he’d been coming here with his family all his life.” We stood at the top of the sandy walkway up to our knees in the tall, reedy grass and stopped to look at the incredible sweep of ocean and sky, with not a human in sight.
“This is what Adam lived for to sail on that water from the first light of day till the sun set beyond the Gay-head Cliffs. Every vacation, every long weekend, every space in our lives we scrambled to get here.
“We became engaged and set a date to get married, right after the bar exam the summer I graduated from law school. We bought the house together and started to fix it up. Adam had known the old lady who lived in it widow of a fisherman from an old island family and had promised her he’d never tear it down or modernize it the way so many people have done to the original farmhouses.”
We were walking westward, as sand crabs scurried to get out of our way and birds hovered behind us to see if we had scraps of food to drop for their dinner.
“Most of my family and friends had come up to the island the week before the wedding. There were beach picnics and cocktail parties and Sunfish races and clambakes and I never thought there could be an end to my happiness.
“Adam was the one with the inflexible schedule so he was the only person we were waiting for those last days.
His final shift was over at midnight on Thursday he was working in New York City by then and he got in his car to make the drive up to the ferry so he could be here at daybreak on Friday.“
I was doing fine. I was telling the story so flatly that I knew I could get through it okay there wasn’t enough emotion left in me this week to squeeze out much for these memories, mixed as they were with such swings of joy and agony.
“I never saw Adam again, never heard his gentle voice or felt the warmth of those wonderful hands on my body.
Everyone who loved him as I did stayed on the island for his funeral. There was no wedding, and I never got to be his bride.”
My voice was still strong and I wasn’t even conscious of the tears streaking down my cheeks, till Mike grabbed me by the shoulders.
“C’mon, Alex, sit down for a minute.
I didn’t mean to get into this. Sit down and catch your breath…“
“Whew. I haven’t said it out loud in so long I just can’t be here without thinking of Adam,” I said, crossing my knees to sit in the sand. Mike joined me and watched as I picked up a stick and mindlessly drew a heart and arrow with Adam’s initials in it, as I used to do so many years ago.
He was too polite to ask me what happened and I was too self-absorbed in the story not to go on.
“It was an accident, Mike, a terrible one Someone on the highway sideswiped Adam’s car. They were crossing one of those bridges in Connecticut, the ones that go over the rivers, and Adam’s car crashed through the guardrail and went over the side of the bridge. It was demolished completely crushed by the impact.”
“Did they get the guy who did it?” asked Mike, as only someone in our business would, I think, since it mattered so little to everyone else once Adam was gone.
“No. It was the middle of the night. No one was around to see what happened. The police didn’t find the car till hours later. But you’re like Adam’s mother. She was sure it had been done on purpose, convinced that he had been working on some secret medical research for the government. She couldn’t let go and accept that it was accidental.”
“But you could?”
“The police gave it a hard look it didn’t make sense that anyone needed to kill Adam for anything, for any reason at all. You know me. I just assumed that the gods don’t like to see me too happy. Adam had given me the future he was smart and funny and warm and loving, and the happiest person I ever met. As my mother would say, ”It just wasn’t meant to be.“
“So instead of dancing in a white tent on our hilltop, we all came to this beach Adam’s favorite. His father and sister went out on his sailboat, brought it around from Menemsha to this point, and scattered his ashes where they thought he’d want them to be. And this is where I come to talk to him, Mike, like some madwoman in a bad novel, you’re probably thinking. But I’ll never let go of him. It’s where I always come to find him and love him, and know that he loved me better than anything on earth.
That’s the thing that killed him driving all night to get here to marry me.“
Mike let me sit there alone for five or ten minutes while he walked further down the beach, before returning with an outstretched arm to pull me up from the sand.
“Give me the keys, kid, and let’s get to the plane. It would be my luck to get marooned here overnight at a time when you’re this maudlin, and stuck on another guy.”
We walked back to the car and Mike drove the short distance to the airport, where we turned in the rental car and waited in the terminal for the perky pilot to come back for the six o’clock Cape Air flight to Logan. There was no wind to speak of so even Mike stayed calm on the short hop into Boston.
I was leading him from the exit gate of the commuter plane to the corridor for the connecting shuttle flight, when I heard Mike call out for me to stop. He was standing still, staring at the television screen that was facing out at him from the airport bar, and gesturing excitedly for me to walk back to him.
“Hey, Coop, can you believe it?
“Jeopardy” must be on earlier up here than in New York. C’mon, they’re about to do the Final Jeopardy question.“
I reminded myself of a mother talking to a five-year-old kid as I shook my head in annoyance and called out to him, “No, Mike. Move it let’s not miss the seven o’clock shuttle.”