She nodded.
“Will you tell me? Because things just don’t add up. They say the Axis are hard socialist, and that they want us to be as well. They say they want to take from us our freedom of religion and speech and the right to work. Take from us our right to vote. They say they are Godless autocrats who seek to revive communist ideals by beating us into submission. Please, tell me the truth.”
She considered this for a moment and shook her head. “Maybe someday. Look, I gotta go.” She got up and dusted off her clothes. Our wonderful moment, a tiny bubble floating in a sea of darkness and doubt, was unraveling. “If father catches you with me, you’re done.”
“I know.”
She acted as if she were about to bolt, then stopped. “That’s why I’ve been staying away. I don’t want to make things more complicated for us. It’s hard enough serving with dear old dad, but us, that’s some legitimate Shakespearian nonsense. You don’t want him to go to war against you. We need you to survive.”
I hung my head between my legs. “I know, it’s just—”
“David?”
“Yeah?”
“Why didn’t you meet me?” Her question came at me out of nowhere, a glittering knife with a razor’s edge poised over my chest.
“What?” I raised my head and cocked it to the side, heart aching.
“After we trashed the skimmer I waited for you just like we’d planned.” Her left eye twitched as she took a deep breath. “But you never came. Why is that?”
I averted my gaze and focused on the dirt, counting rocks till I could draw the will to respond. Too bad emotional territory wasn’t her thing. It must have been hard for her to even as much as she had.
She moved on. “By the way, David, all that PT you’ve been doing… keep it up. You look really, really good.” And she slipped off through the leaves, leaving behind one dumbstruck idiot who couldn’t utter the answer to a simple question. An answer she deserved.
I waited for a moment, recollecting my balance. The green’s effect was still heavy in my system.
Had she just complimented my body? I spun the gasket on my finger and grinned, then stumbled back to my quarters, not nearly as careful this time. As I rounded the turn into the port hatch of Crew 1, I found Griffin staring at me from down the hall, mouth agape.
Had Liberty just passed her? Had she put it all together? I knew my expression of pure rapture had to be a glaring clue. Who the hell looked like that in this madhouse? Most of us who started acting too happy ended up in a sleeveless jacket and a dark room for a few days.
I waved a hand, acting casual, and went back to my bunk. Here’s to hoping Griffin isn’t the unrequited jealous type.
[9]
I awoke the following morning with both my biggest smile and worst hunger pains on record, piled a tray of slop and poured a cup of what passed for coffee on a Brethren warship. It was black and hot, and it had caffeine, but I doubt it came from the Earth’s equator like coffee should. César gave me a strange look as I ate fitfully, but before he could inquire as to my cheerful disposition, I sent him off on tasks, informing him I’d be there in a minute. He took up his tool belt with a little more force than was required, red handled combo torch and all, and stomped out of the empty crew quarters. I rolled my eyes after he was gone. He was stewing, that much was clear. But over what?
That aside, the biggest question on my mind was, where do I go from here?
Obviously, Liberty and I couldn’t be open about this, I mean, hell, we’d almost gotten caught despite the fact that most of the ship was asleep. But I couldn’t think to stay away from her, not for a second. Dreaming of her smiling face and moist lips summoned all kinds of effervescent emotions. I imagined us doing the sorts of things normal couples might; shopping in the Arsia markets, taking a trip to Earth, Australia, or hitting the dunes at high speed in a brand new skimmer. Liberty and I would kill at racing. We could do doubles. Who needed for women to be given out like popcorn when I had her? If I really did have her.
My grin slipped.
I was so caught up my thoughts I hadn’t noticed the new arrival. Dour Face was taking the seat across from me, setting his stun stick on the table with a click. “Good morning, Master Engineer. Sleep well?”
A bite of slop froze on its way to my former grin. “Good morning, officer.”
He made a showy yawn and went on, “Same old slop gets tiresome, doesn’t it?”
“Um, sometimes, but it’s better than being hungry.”
He shrugged. “Makes you miss those days planet side, canned beans, fresh greens. Huh? We had steak and potatoes last night. Too bad it was all frozen. Been in cold storage for near on two years.” He tapped his fingers against the table in a rhythm. “Don’t you miss the bigger meat rations? Beef tips? Pork chops? Fatback?”
“Who wouldn’t?”
He glanced over his shoulder, turned back and leaned in. “So I hear the Lieutenant and you were in grade school together.”
“Fryatt?” I swallowed.
“Yes, Fryatt? What other hot trick of a Lieutenant do we have on board?”
My face was getting hot. I took a drink of water, first pushing aside the coffee. “Yeah, we were.”
“So, you eh, you know her pretty well?”
“Back then I did,” I admitted, “but not so much now.” Not an entire lie. Images of her face flashed in my mind as an anger flared in my chest. “You know, just haven’t been in touch for a long time. People grow apart as they grow up. Happens every day.”
“I see. Well, damn, she’s got a nice ass on her, doesn’t she? I’ve had better, you know, I like ’em all tiny like a doll, pale skin and not so dark, but beggars can’t be choosers. Hmm?” He pointed to my pile of slop with his stick.
“I… I’ve been too busy to take notice. I’m sure she’s just fine.” It was hard to keep my hands from shaking. They wanted nothing more than to burst free and clean this guy’s injectors.
“I find that hard to believe.” He barked a contemptuous laugh. “Ha. Even if you’re just enlisted, you still got those urges, we all do. Might wanna find a good place to vent them.”
“Um. I’ll be fine.”
“Hey now, hotshot,” he said in singsong, as if a random thought had just occurred to him. “She likes to ‘talk tech’, doesn’t she? I’m a bit of a tech head myself. What do you think we should talk about? Is she into chemical computing? Multilateral net sharing?”
I felt my angry stomach sink into dread. Liberty nor I, had used that term aboard this ship except for last night. Sure, Liberty had said it often enough back when we were younger, but not here. “I, um, don’t really know, I haven’t had the chance to talk to her.” I rubbed at the gasket on my ring finger, pressing so hard it made the digit pulse along with my heartbeat.
“Oh, is that so?” Dour Face looked surprised, his broad nose flaring out. “Well, it’s for the best. Enlisted and officers aren’t supposed to mix anyways. We’re like oil and water, right? Or, maybe, feces and food? One little drop and it ruins the whole damn thing. Best to keep the trash separate. We’d hate to fail inspection.”
My face grew hot so fast I nearly flung myself across the table and started beating him within an inch of his life, a stampede of wild emotions overtaking my common sense. He tapped the stun stick with a finger and I arrested myself. He would drop me in an instant, then toss me in the brig for attacking an officer. I wasn’t willing to risk that, not yet. César wasn’t ready to take my place.
“I do what the rules require,” I said, and swallowed another bite. Stone faced.