***
The smell of fresh-ground coffee hit, second only to the sight of Banner at the corner table straight ahead. He wasn’t wearing a suit, to her dismay, but his black shirt made him look almost as dignified. Or maybe it was the five o’clock shadow on those high cheekbones. She regretted what she was about to do. She’d love to kiss those sexy lips one more time.
He stood up when she approached the table, and like a gentleman, pulled the chair out for her across from where he’d been sitting. Unexpectedly, he also pecked her on the cheek. The affection threw her off her game already, which didn’t bode well.
“Here.” He pushed a cup toward her. “I got your tea.”
“Thanks.” Vowing to keep her cool, despite the warmth of his lips lingering on her cheek, she sat down and looked at him. “Are you off today? I was expecting to see you in a suit.”
He winked. “I bet you were.”
Her face turned hot as she glanced at the table. Ugh. How did he manage to keep her so off balance? “Shut up,” she mumbled.
When she lifted her gaze, he cocked an eyebrow at her. It was bratty, but what could he do? They were in the middle of a public place. It wasn’t as if he’d spank her there. She smirked. She could play games too.
Sighing, he sat back in his chair. “Did you come here just to brat at me and think you’re safe, or was there something on your mind?”
She shook herself back to business mode. “I just wanted to thank you for your help. I know it was an inconvenience.” A vision of Banner pounding into her, chest sweaty, smiling when she screamed popped into her mind. Maybe not that inconvenient. He seemed to enjoy their lessons. “But I think I’ve learned all I need to.”
“Wait a minute.” His brow furrowed. “Is this a break-up speech?”
She shrugged. “Is there anything to break up? We were never together.”
“True.” He narrowed his eyes and stared, making her shrink back at his intensity. “What’s this really about? What’s scaring you off?”
“Nothing,” she snapped too quickly.
His lips quirked, and she sighed.
“I just . . .”
“Can’t resist me when we’re together and that’s freaking out your carefully controlled world.”
Ding, ding, ding. We have a winner.
She swallowed hard and squirmed in her seat. “It wasn’t supposed to go like this. I just think I’m ready to move on now. I’ve learned a lot.”
“Have you?”
“Yes.” More than he knew.
“What did you learn?”
“Protocol. Expectations . . .”
“No. I mean, what did you learn about yourself?”
Her gaze flickered to his, gauging whether he was serious. Their eyes met in a moment of scorching heat. Their chemistry was still there, as electric as it’d been a few nights before. And now he seemed to be staring into her, searching for truths she didn’t want to share. Quickly, she looked away. For some reason, the urge to answer him honestly, even if it made her vulnerable, was too much to resist.
“Um.” She laced her fingers together then looked at him. “I learned what submission is.”
“And what’s that?”
“I can tell you what it’s not. It’s not weakness of character. It’s not antifeminist. It’s not about being a doormat.”
“And it’s not about losing control.”
“I don’t know about that.”
“It’s about handing it over. To someone you trust. To someone you could eventually come to love.”
Love? Could she grow to love someone who demanded control? Weeks ago she’d have adamantly protested the idea, but now . . . she wasn’t so sure. Being a slave was out of the question, but submitting was becoming about more than just good sex. Admitting that to Banner would only make it harder to end things, especially with their connection. He’d see no reason they couldn’t continue having sex and experimenting with BDSM, but her future wasn’t his main concern. She had to keep her goal in mind. Finding a partner who was as good at loving her inside the bedroom as he was outside of it.
At his expectant look, she gave him a noncommittal shrug.
It was quiet for a moment as she stared at the table. Then she glanced up at him. What was he thinking? Was he sad they wouldn’t have sex anymore? Would he refuse to stay friends? She didn’t get the impression it was all about sex for him, but it was hard to be sure. He was a guy after all—wasn’t that supposedly first and foremost on their minds?
He pinned her with a somber gaze. “I have one more thing I want you to do. For you. Not for me.”
“Okay,” she said skeptically.
“Just hear me out. I’m going to throw a party and invite my Dom friends to meet you. Guys that I know are reputable.”
“Uhh.” Was Hell no too rude an answer?
He moved in closer, leaning across the table to catch her gaze. “I would never put you at risk, Kate. Do you believe that?”
“Yes, but you can’t know everything.” Even Janine, her best friend in the world, hadn’t known that pirate guy would end up a douche bag.
He smiled. “You trust me.”
Why did he look so gleeful about that? “Yeah. So?”
“It’s just very satisfying.”
“Don’t flatter yourself. I trust you to keep me from getting assaulted by your friends the same way I trust my mailman to deliver letters addressed to me. You’re both fulfilling a job. Nothing more.”
His smile faded. “You think this is just a job to me? I can’t possibly see how, considering you’re not paying me.”
“It’s a job. The currency is just . . . different.”
“I’m not doing this for sex.” He leaned back, frowning. “You make me sound like an asshole.”
“Sorry.” She dropped her head. “I guess I just don’t understand why you’re doing it.”
“It started off because I was bored, and maybe lonely. But now I care about you, Kate.” He stared at her earnestly, as though he was hoping for a response.
Her cheeks flushed. He cared about her? Why did that make butterflies take off in her belly?
“I want to make sure you find someone safe to go to from here.” He shrugged and cracked a pained smile. “It’s the protective Dom thing. Even if you’re not mine, you’re still vulnerable. Too many submissives get hurt looking for a Dom. I don’t want that to be you.”
A smile touched her lips. “Thank you.” His sentiment was sweet. She almost didn’t want to go on with her plan. Having someone care about her so much that they would protect her even when they weren’t together was novel. But there was more than that for her. A real regret was growing, but making this work was a pipe dream. He deserved better—someone who could meet his needs and not have to fake it. Someone who wouldn’t resent his kink, but would enjoy it.
“So you’ll meet some of my friends? You’ll try your best to be a good girl?” he asked. “Remember, you’ll never win a Dom over with behavior like you had with my last introduction.”
She rolled her eyes. “Yes, I’ll be good. I told you I learned a lot.”
“Excellent. I’ll make some calls and see if I can set something up for this weekend.”
She nodded, then bit her lip. The truth of what she’d just agreed to came crashing down. “Banner . . .”
“Yes?”
“This is just to . . . meet them, right? Nothing crazy?”
He leaned forward. “That’s entirely up to you.”
Then it was a big fat no.
“But if we put on a . . . display, it’ll show them what kind of sub you are and whether your kinks line up.”
She gulped. “A display?”
“Just to show you off. It doesn’t have to be much. I’ll show them some of the things you’ve learned. Protocol, how to kneel, that sort of thing.”
She felt her eyes go wide. “Like I’m in a dog show?”
His beautiful lips curved. “Like you’re a prize to be won.”
A treasure . . . a prize . . . Always with the flattery. Okay, so maybe they’d make a match faster if his friends could see what kinds of things she was into. Maybe she wouldn’t have to kiss as many frogs. Still, the idea of being shown off like an animal made her feel kind of weird. But she trusted Banner. He hadn’t objectified her yet, so maybe he had a way of getting through this without it coming to that.