I attempt to relax against him, allowing him to lead as his hands caress my lower back. I’m acutely aware of his chest pressed to mine, his hips pressed to my hips. He smells of rain and masculine cologne. My eyes shut, taking in his scent, and my head swims. Whether from the little bit of wine I had with supper or his proximity, I’m unsure. He’s dancing far too close for era customs, and I’m uncomfortable with his show.
Turning my head to the side, I seek air not shared between the prince and me, and notice Devlan across the room. He’s leaning against the far wall and burning a hole into something, or someone, with his eyes. Shifting my head, I follow his gaze. One of the king’s Round Table knights of the Force—the one who callously took me from my home—Larsen… Laren… no, Larkin is dancing with a petite girl in a satin cream dress.
I look back at Devlan and consider the gravity of his stare. Is he angry that Sir Larkin isn’t dressed in uniform? The girl is beautiful. Mayhap she’s someone Devlan cares for. I smile to myself, trying to envision the over-serious Devlan being romantic with anyone. It’s an amusing thought. He takes his duty as first knight too severely to become involved.
Why do I care?
I don’t care. I’m trying to avoid my thoughts of the betrothal and my father and being this close to Sebastian now. Imagining a scandal with the knights is a good distraction from my own situation. Soon, I’ll have to plot an escape, and that thought terrifies me, especially after witnessing the Force torturing Mr. Levine, and seeing the dreaded King Hart on the monitor during the ceremony.
Sebastian nuzzles his head closer to mine, resting his cheek against my temple. “See,” he whispers in my ear, his breath warm on my skin. “This isn’t so bad.”
I don’t respond. I can’t. If I open my mouth in this moment, everything will fly out. He’s forcing me to marry him, to be a queen, and sit idly by as he rules his realm with malice and fear. I want nothing to do with that, and I detest him and this era for not allowing me a say in my own future, and this shattered world for taking my father.
I won’t rule over a kingdom where everyone you love is taken by some Virus no one understands. Where everyone pretends Karm isn’t a neat lie woven into a pretty package meant to deceive us about the horrid truth of our reality. Most days, I wonder if everyone is being fed some drug that keeps them in a lucid daze, and somehow, I’m the only one immune.
The music switches tempo, and bodies break apart as the beat demands a fast-paced dance. I separate from Sebastian, but his hands linger on my waist.
“Well, thank you for the dance,” I say. “But I’m too tired from today’s events to entertain you further.” I curtsy slightly, keeping my eyes on him.
He nods. “I’m pleased with our first dance,” he says, and I arch an eyebrow. “Let me escort you back to the table.” He offers me his arm.
I accept it, latching my fingers onto his solid arm, and suspect he’s flexing. Sebastian is built well; I’ll admit to that. He has a tight, muscular form that makes the girls of Karm swoon, but his arrogance ruins the effect. The appalling words that fall from his mouth shatter the illusion.
“Prince Sebastian,” a high-pitched voice calls from behind us. I turn with Sebastian as he guides me to face a perfectly polished young maiden. No doubt a lady of the court, flawlessly packaged in a gleaming silver dress, as if she stepped right out of a painting.
Sebastian tips his head forward. “Miss Cecily.” He pivots my way. “I don’t believe you’ve had the privilege of meeting my betrothed.”
Cecily’s gleaming blue eyes sweep over me, very apparently. “Congratulations on your engagement. It’s wonderful to make your acquaintance, Princess Zara.” She curtsies low.
“Thank you. It’s lovely to meet you, Miss Cecily.” I attempt to mimic her expert curtsy, but feel I’m not quite as lithe.
Her lips twitch, and she covers her mouth with a gloved hand. I scrunch my eyebrows and look at Sebastian, but his face is stoic. I realize my blunder. Madity coached me not to bow or curtsy to others of a lower station now that I’m considered royalty. Heat splashes my cheeks.
Cecily doesn’t acknowledge my ignorance for long. She quickly moves her gaze to Sebastian. “You’re not going to sit out the Branle, are you, Prince Sebastian?” She twirls a perfectly coiled blonde curl around her finger.
Standing awkwardly by his side, I look up to Sebastian as he clears his throat. “Actually, my princess needs a respite.” His eyes glance at me. “She’s weary from today’s events.”
I open my mouth to agree, but Cecily cuts in. “It would be an honor to dance in her stead.” She moves closer to Sebastian. “I would hate for you to miss out on your favorite dance.” She puckers her mouth into a pout.
Oh, for heaven’s sake. “Please, Miss Cecily,” I say. “I’d appreciate you keeping the prince entertained while I rest.” I give Sebastian a curt nod, then quit their company before my supper makes an unwanted appearance on the dance floor.
As I weave my way toward the table, I force my jaw to unclench. If dancing with Sebastian and laughing at my lack of etiquette gives this noble girl satisfaction, so be it. It only vexes me a small amount that she believes she’s… well, vexed me.
I settle down in my chair and release a heavy breath. Lugging my gown around is tiring work, though at least Madity removed the train after the ceremony. I find myself missing her company as I watch the nobles dance and laugh. She’s the closest thing I have to a friend here.
Sebastian and Cecily hold hands and dance around the room, skipping and clapping and laughing with the other courtiers. I’ll admit, Sebastian is a fine dancer. Cecily equals his grace, making them stand out amid the others. They look good together, evenly matched in both beauty and elegance. Why didn’t he choose her? She obviously wouldn’t be despondent over marrying the prince of Karm.
Sebastian cuts out of the dance early and joins me at the table. He’s quiet, and I choose to say nothing about Cecily. I’ve met many of the court ladies tonight, and all have been flirtatious toward Sebastian and standoffish with me. I’m sure this will become the norm for my relationships with them.
I sigh, missing Hadley with a deep ache. After seeing her drawn face tonight, I realize it will never be the same. I don’t know whether she assumes I’ll ignore her because of my new station, or if she’s upset because this was her dream. She’ll never know that I’ve been removed to this place, and wouldn’t disregard her on purpose, though that doesn’t matter now. I must sever ties. I don’t want to endanger anyone when I run. She’ll honestly have no knowledge of my whereabouts.
I push the heavy thoughts from my mind and scan the room. Devlan’s attention is still taken. I try to spot the couple on the floor, but they’re no longer dancing. The girl in the cream dress is just slipping through the arched doorway. Larkin stands at a table for a moment, then sets down his wine and follows after her. Scandalous, indeed.
Devlan takes a step forward as if he’s going to pursue them, but halts. His eyes shoot in our direction—to me. His features are strained, his brow furrowed, but he chooses to come to us instead of chasing down the couple.
I grab a dinner roll and tear small pieces onto my plate, giving my hands something to do. What is the story behind the gray-eyed knight and the girl in the cream dress? If I asked Devlan, would he tell me? I shake my head. I have too many worries of my own to make it my business.
Sebastian stands to meet Devlan as he approaches. “Devlan,” he says. “All is well?”
“Yes, Your Highness. Everyone is enjoying themselves.” His eyes dart to me, then back to Sebastian.