The third big change in Madam X came about unconsciously. Some time or other, she gave up her nighttime ‘‘dispel boredom’’ activities and hid out in the dark room, ‘‘concentrating on creating miracles.’’ And thus the female colleague noticed that her good friend had ‘‘completely lost her femininity’’ and ‘‘wouldn’t be able to attract even the ugliest man’s interest.’’ Her best friend was ‘‘deeply mortified’’ by this and yearned for ‘‘the good old days,’’ because ‘‘those days had been so enraptured.’’ ‘‘Living in those days, she felt she would always be a young girl, always superior, and absolutely confident.’’
After embracing the bygone days, she angrily changed the subject: ‘‘What do all of you think about this hanky-panky behind closed doors? She wants to create a false image of being loyal and steadfast: this is clear enough. Isn’t this a joke? As for adultery, it doesn’t make any difference whether there’s one lover or twenty. Doesn’t she even know this much? If we can say that her past behavior embodied a certain innocence and was a kind of free indulgence, she certainly doesn’t have that excuse anymore. She’s actually a complete sham, a person with detestable behavior. And all of a sudden she closes the door and changes from a devil into an angel! And becomes extremely serious! What’s she trying to prove? Does she think she can get a lock on her lover’s heart this way? Right. I remember this is just the kind of person she is. If she stares at someone, then she immediately affects a certain attitude, as if she has reformed completely overnight. I hear that her lover is a weirdo who is incredibly jealous. Because of him, she doesn’t look at any other men. She hides inside all the time. Although she has no other choice, I still have to say that this is the most scandalous behavior I’ve ever seen in her. She even calls this behavior ‘creation’-her ‘creation.’ Rather, she has created herself into a disgusting weirdo. Those who used to appreciate her all want to cover their noses and flee! When she leaves her room, her whole body reeks of sulfur. Whenever she opens her window, the passersby see thick smoke billowing out from her room! Who could still remember the likable woman I used to work with? She’s ruined her self-image. This is really depressing.’’ The female colleague began shedding tears. The people listening to her felt touched by the women’s friendship: they all looked downcast.
Was Madam X really ‘‘creating miracles’’ in her room? Could she purposely throw out this smoke bomb and actually tryst inside with her lover? Answer: No. You have to realize that she wasn’t so simple- minded or so driven by passion that she would entice her lover to her home for a daytime tryst. We mustn’t underestimate our adversary. As for the site of their tryst, no one up to now has come up with any reliable information. One said it was on the mountain nearby; another said it was behind the garbage dump; another said it was in Old Meng’s attic (the one who had this opinion was the good friend of X’s husband); another said it was in the meeting room, and so on and on and on. Out of more than a thousand people, there were at least five hundred different views. So we can see only that the crowds were motivated by their inner passion to come up with some irresponsible guesses. But the adultery actually did occur very recently. Inwardly, everyone was sure of this. In the dark meeting, they verified this with their high-level telepathy. Each person had actually ‘‘seen’’ the adultery, and they could still see it clearly. If you asked about it, they were unanimous. As for the place and the time- those were minor issues. The important point was that they had ‘‘seen’’ it. And this ‘‘seeing’’ was ever-present: it richly embodied the artistic temperament and poetic grace among the people on Five Spice Street. Since Madam X could become ‘‘invisible’’ in her adultery with Mr. Q, others couldn’t get a handle on it. Yet, the elites on Five Spice Street could re-create her adultery by employing a special method-called ‘‘the fox is smart, the hunter is smarter.’’
It didn’t matter whether Madam X was phony or real-nothing mattered. Now she really was staying away from men. No longer did any dizzying fragrance come from her person. Nor did she any longer have that sort of ‘‘sex appeal.’’ When her sister asked about this, Madam X laughed out loud and said that she ‘‘hadn’t even thought about it.’’ How would she know if other people were interested in her? She had never bothered to figure out whether she was ‘‘chaste or lewd.’’ She was simply being herself. She liked men. Too bad that when she opened her eyes, all she saw was garbage. Since now she had found the one she truly loved, ‘‘she wouldn’t lay an eye on those pieces of garbage.’’ She couldn’t be happier: she didn’t care what other people thought! That day, she and her sister sat for a long time in the dark room. By the light that came from the mirrors, her sister saw tears in Madam X’s eyes: in fact, she wasn’t as happy as she’d said she was. At once, her sister empathetically began to take pity on this ‘‘beloved older sister.’’ She arbitrarily thought that her sister must be cold and took a woolen coat out of the closet and draped it over her shoulders. Yet, it was a warm May day. Everyone else was wearing light clothing. She seemed to stop worrying a little only when she saw her put on the coat.
‘‘When I’m here, I feel alone. There are a lot of people outside, but I don’t know them-and haven’t for a long time. I pretend that they’re old friends, but in fact, I’ve never been able to tell them apart. I just call out any old name and tell some stories. Sometimes, it’s really quiet here. I don’t know whether this is good or not, and there’s no way to anticipate it: you can only wait. Do you still remember that we used to sing? That was a long time ago, wasn’t it? As for your brother-in-law, I’m going to leave him. I’ve had a premonition of that.’’
‘‘Let’s sing then,’’ her sister said, choking with sobs. (Listening to her sister’s sentimental words, she was already all tears. Anyhow, she was completely confused. She realized only that a catastrophe was about to befall them.)
‘‘Don’t sing!’’ Madam X curled her body into a ball. ‘‘Listen closely: he’s walking back and forth on the hill over there. I can hear him. When he isn’t here, I sit in this corner and listen: I hear everything. You know, he doubts his own existence. This is agonizing for me. There is a certain fateful thing in this. It’s coming: can I accept it?’’
The sister’s emotions were on the verge of exploding. Crying her eyes out, she wept for about fifteen minutes.
“You didn’t understand,’’ Madam X finally said. ‘‘Everything happened as I wished, even much better than I wished. You can’t imagine how good it is. At the time, how many rules I made for my eyes!’’
‘‘Did you bring it into effect?’’ her sister asked, close to tears.
‘‘Not just that!! I have everything-everything… Ah, I want to keep him, I want to do my best to keep him!’’ She stamped her foot and looked decisive.
One day not long after the crowds noticed the third big change in Madam X, an obtrusive guy forced his way into her home and stood bravely in the midst of the flickering demonic mirrors. He asked Madam X a lot of flirtatious questions, such as ‘‘Are you lonely at night?’’ ‘‘What kind of experience have you had with masculine charms?’’ ‘‘Is reddish-gold velour sexy?’’ and so on. After he finished asking these questions, he noticed that Madam X had climbed up to the windowsill. Only his voice was whirling crazily in the dark room: it was like playing a record over and over again. ‘‘Help me with this curtain,’’ she said to him. ‘‘I was just noticing that there’s a new problem here.’’ At this, the man ran off.
‘‘She isn’t at all the way she used to be. (In the past, when Mr. F and I talked about this at the toilet, we were simply crazy about her.)’’ The man announced, ‘‘When I was with her, she climbed up to the windowsill like a monkey. That was like having a pail of icy water thrown over my feverish body.’’